Title: Perfect Soldier - Chapter 23 + Epilogue.
Genre: Crossover (Dark Angel) / Drama
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Sam/Kurt.
Summary: Sam Evans, X4-471, decided that Lima, Ohio was a safe, innocent and unassuming place to start a new life. One moment changed that assumption.
AN: I am so saddened this is over but at the same time very happy that I had such a fun journey. There is definitely more Sam and Kurt coming from me in the future. I love you guys <3
He was panicking, sitting between the X5 and the human boy. They were grilling him, telling him about his past, asking questions and they continuously referred to him as Sam. The name Sam was unfamiliar and cold, but at the same time every time they said it, it spread something through his chest, especially when the boy who called himself Kurt said it. When Kurt said the name Sam, he was filled with a warmth and familiarity that soothed the ache he felt all throughout his body. He wasn’t hurting when Kurt called him Sam.
Why did just the name Sam coming from Kurt make him feel like crying? Crying was an expression of human weakness and not something that he had any familiarity with whatsoever. He had never cried in his life, had he? He was not equipped for tears and he was not going to cry right here and now.
“I need you to think about Manticore,” said the girl, the one who called herself Jondy but identified herself with the designation X5-210. “Think about Manticore Sam and while you think of it, think about the most painful moments you endured there. Think about feeling like a guinea pig, a pawn, an experiment…think about the absolute helplessness you felt.”
He closed his eyes at the insistence. All that he could really feel was helplessness.
He was submerged in a tank, his lungs feeling as though they were going to explode. He opened his eyes and shook his head, begging the commanding officer to let him come up for air. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t hold his breath that long. He did not have the capacity to hold the oxygen that was left in his lungs any longer. Why didn’t they make their soldiers with goddamned gills if they wanted them to be able to withstand long term submersion? He needed to get out or he was going to die.
He hated them. He hated them. He did not understand anything about Manticore and their ideals anymore. His brain was spazzing out from lack of oxygen and he didn’t understand them but he hated them. He was just a pawn for their games. If he didn’t have the physical capabilities to do what they wanted him to do, it was his fault, not theirs. They were the ones who made him. They couldn’t accept their own failures. He was one of their many failures and they could not accept that they ever had failures.
He opened them again and shook his head. “I couldn’t breathe,” he told Jondy. “They were trying to make us develop more endurance than we physically could.”
“The tank,” she said softly, understanding what he was talking about. She looked at him and then over to the young boy, Kurt. Kurt looked a little bit terrified and Sam wanted nothing more than to calm his terror but at the same time more memories came back and flooded him.
Sam’s mind flashed back to the channel and the way he had been forced to swim it and called useless for his lack of ability.
He was terrified of water, terrified of the way it entered his mouth and filled his lungs. He was terrified of being engulfed by the blackness underneath and all around him.
“I couldn’t endure water,” he whispered, keeping his eyes closed again because the emotions were getting the best of him. He had been lying when he said he never cried. Some nights he would cry in his bunk in the barracks. He would hide underneath the thin cotton blanket and still his breath so that none of the other soldiers or heaven forbid, the men who patrolled the halls, would hear his desperate and pathetic cries. “I cried. I’ve cried.”
He remembered exactly how it felt. Soldiers were not human. Emotions were weak. He should have never cried. Crying was wrong. Crying was so wrong.
He was crying again. He felt the burn of tears forming in his eyes and reached up to wipe them away with the back of his hand. “I don’t want to be crying,” he said out loud and immediately, he found that the boy, Kurt, was wrapping an arm around him and holding him tight. He could not remember ever accepting comfort from someone before, but it felt so nice to do so. He leaned into Kurt’s side and Kurt held him close. He sighed, feeling so complete in Kurt’s arms.
“I hate to push you Sam,” the X5 said. “I just need to be able to recover your memory and I have none of the technical equipment Manticore would have to help you. You are remembering though. You made a conscious choice to escape Manticore, a few months after a rogue group of X5s escaped. You need to remember this.”
Sam tried to remember what the girl was talking about, because he knew it was vital. He knew underneath all of the lost and missing memories that he had to be able to get back to that point in time. He had to or else he could be victim to Manticore again. They had hurt him and battered him.
“I was staring out my window.”
The X4, who now identified as Sam, stared out the window. His barracks were on the top floor of the facility and the windows were barred, but he could see the landscape outside of Manticore. It was a long stretch of forest and if he could make it past the perimeter fence, he knew that he could lose them.
There would be armed guards and there would be dogs. The spotlights would be able to catch him, if he didn’t move fast enough. It was a suicide mission but living here, enduring this, that was suicide in itself.
The X5s had done it. They were barely children and they had done it. Sam dealt with the lingering realization that the X5s were stronger and faster but he had the advantage right now. Manticore was distracted and he was useless. He could escape. He could get out and he could make it.
Leaping over the fence was hardly a decision at all, it was an instinct. X4-471 took the fence in a single bound. Unlike the X5 escapees from several months earlier, he knew what he was doing. He was halfway through the woods by the time the sirens blared, the voices from far off easily heard. He had waited until the hysteria over the X5 escapes escalated and made the move when the focus was elsewhere and the time was right. He felt bullets fly past him, but they never touched him. He had made a choice long ago, which made escaping no choice at all in the moment. He was still a soldier, but he had chosen this mission for himself.
He was hit, once, before he got to safety, but he still never flinched, never looked back.
“I never looked back.”
Kurt smiled weakly and Sam realized that the boy had tears in his eyes too. Why was he crying? What reason did he have to be crying? Sam didn’t really understand but he knew that he was slowly recovering his memories.
“He’s coming back to you,” the little girl told Kurt. “I have faith in him. He’s recovering very fast and I think that you’re key to that recovery. He’s strong.” She looked around the bedroom and frowned a little bit. “I need to go Kurt.”
“What, why?” Kurt asked.
Sam didn’t understand what either of them was talking about. He looked at the little girl and felt a sense of familiarity, care and distance. He didn’t know how he knew her though or how he met her. He was slowly realizing that she was an X5 escapee and he felt a sort of hero complex. They were his heroes and he did admire them more than anything.
“It’s not safe here,” she said. “Sam is safe, at least for awhile, because that woman eradicated record of his existence. You’ll have to do all you can to keep him safe, but he remembers what he needs to remember and he has stated that he’s going to stay with you no matter what. I am not safe, if that woman mentions that she saw an X5 escapee. We are truly more valuable to Manticore than he is.”
She flushed and ran a hand through her short, choppy hair. “Also, I have meddled far more than I should have. If Zack ever knew what I had done...Lydecker won’t stop until he finds us or dies trying. I have to go.”
Kurt nodded slowly.
“Protect Sam for me?”
Sam frowned indignantly at her statement. How could the human boy protect him? Then he remembered Kurt’s arms around him and wondered if maybe he could. He watched, confused, as the girl turned and then quickly wrapped her arms around him. “Thank you for teaching me a little about being human Sam. I appreciate it. I hope we get to meet each other again.”
She was gone quickly, Sam feeling a distinct sense of loss with her departure. He closed his eyes and felt thet small body of the boy, Kurt, press up tightly against his. “I thought I’d lost you,” he whispered. “I was so scared. I love you Sam, I love you so much alright? I know you can’t remember me yet but I love you.”
“I… I love you too.”
Epilogue - 2021, Lima, Ohio.
Kurt watched the Seattle news with wide-eyed horror. He and Sam had heard rumors about Manticore burning to the ground and Sam had wanted to go, but transporation in between the states was at an all time level of difficulty and Seattle was one of the most broken cities in the United States. “It’s not safe,” Sam had told him, the for you in that statement being totally implied.
The pictures were brutal, images of half-human-half-animal hybrid creatures running wild in Seattle and being tormented and tortured by maverick groups of rouge transgenic hunters. The city was terrified and it was all because there was something they didn’t understand. Kurt felt his heart drop when he saw the burning crosses, the hicks crying about not letting “trannies” as they called them, into their towns and businesses.
He felt Sam come up from behind him. “You know that we have to go to Seattle,” he said, turning around and looking the other man in the eye. Sam nodded slowly. Sam knew that he had to get back there and help those like him.
Sam and Kurt had lived in relative peace for a decade. They were married, had jobs, everything, but they could never forget where Sam came from. Sam had suffered immensely in the labs of Manticore and thousands of others had been set free on a town unwilling to accept them. “I can’t imagine what would have happened if I hadn’t escaped,” he told Kurt, softly. “Now they’re free of that hell and walked right into a city that doesn’t want them. I mean, I’m likely the last living of my particular make but…”
“We have to go,” Kurt said softly, not even noticing the tiny sounds of his niece running up behind him.
Five year old Jenna Hudson was Finn’s daughter and she adored her uncles. She crawled up into Kurt’s lap and watched the tv for a moment, before declaring softly, “It’s not fair what those people are doin’. Everyone is the same inside.”
“You are right, Jenna,” Sam said, patting her on the head.
A moment later, Jenna was joined by her father. Finn looked at Sam and Kurt. “I knew that you guys would be watching this,” he said softly. “It’s really, it’s really that place, isn’t it Sam?”
Sam nodded slowly. “Kurt and I are going to go there,” he said softly. “I owe it to the people who were taken down by that place, you know?”
“But Sam…” Finn said, but his protests were halfhearted at the best. He knew what they had to do and he knew why they had to do it. He took the tiny child from Kurt and she crawled up onto her daddy’s shoulders. “You guys have to stay safe, alright?”
“I wouldn’t let anything happen to us,” Kurt said seriously.
“Uncle Kurt and Uncle Sam are really good at making the bad things good again,” Jenna reassured her daddy with the wisdom of a child. “They always make bad things go away and they can make this bad thing go away.”
Finn nodded, slowly. “I know they can.”
The drive to Seattle took a very long time and the whole time, Sam kept brushing his fingers through his hair, trying to hide the barcode on his neck. Kurt knew that Sam was as afraid as he was of being found out. He had seen the images of transgenics strung up in makeshift lynchings and he knew it was growing more and more dangerous to be like him.
There were more people like him.
Sam was very happy in Ohio with his family. He was living a life that he had always dreamed of, but at the same time he had to think about others like him. He was the last living X4 but transgenics were swarming Seattle. He had to do this.
Just as they arrived in the city, their car was stopped at a sector checkpoint. The sector police ran over their clearance and identities and they were let past. Their car was old, a convertible that came from Kurt’s family shop. Sam slowly drove past the sector checkpoint, looking over to Kurt who gave him a smile.
“We better get gas,” he said, looking at the meter.
They rolled over to a gas station, where a tall female was servicing a motorcycle. She had dyed dark hair and Kurt couldn’t help notice the way she mastered the cycle like it was a child of hers or something. She turned around fast, faster than most people could.
“Sam, Kurt,” she whispered.
Neither the dyed hair, nor the fact that she was twenty years old at least, could hide who she was from them. She pulled her jacket tight against her body and the smallest smile graced her face. “I can’t believe it’s you guys…it’s been…”
“Eleven years,” Sam said, before pulling the X5 into a tight hug. He knew that she objected to the action, could sense it in the way that she pulled back, but he honestly care. It had been eleven years. He had always hoped that he would see the X5 that saved his life again, considering that he had not even been able to remember her when she took off eleven years ago, but she had never returned to Lima, Ohio, nor had any other positive sign that Manticore existed. He ran into a few problems here and there but it seemed Manticore stopped focusing on that one rogue X4 who got out.
The same couldn’t be said for the X5s. Jondy pulled away from Sam’s hug and smiled, shaking her head. “Eleven years,” she repeated. “I always wanted to come to Ohio again, but Zack laid down a pretty tight hold on us in the following years. He never did find out what I did…”
She looked away and smiled softly. “What have you two been doing?” she asked softly. “I can’t believe that all these years and you’re still together.”
Kurt looked at Sam, smiled and Sam could only smile back. “We stayed together,” he said. “We’re married; though Sam had to do some work a couple years ago to make sure his identity didn’t match the one he formed in high school.”
“What about you?” Sam asked.
The girl smiled again, her hands slipping into her pockets. “I went to Los Angeles and started waiting tables,” she said. “I met a couple of boys, avoided Manticore a couple of times, the usual.”
Sam put a hand on her shoulder. “Why are you here?”
“Well,” she said. “I haven’t seen you in eleven years, Sam. I haven’t seen my sister, Max, since the day we escaped, until I saw her on television just a month ago. She’s the hero of our kind and I’m finally going to be able to offer her my aid. My sister Brin’s been reindoctrinated, Tinga is dead, Zack is…well gone. Everything’s falling apart and I need to find her.”
“That’s where we’re going,” Sam said.
“Well, once again, X5-470, otherwise known as Sam, we’re in this together.”