(no subject)
Dear Atlas,
Last night was more intense than I could ever imagined. I never thought that I would tell you that. Maybe it freaks you out how quickly I shove it to the back of my head. How much I close off something that still haunts me and pretend it didn't happen, that it wasn't a real experience. You admitted that discussions about where we are headed scares the hell out of you...
and
I understand and it makes sense but I hope we have a wonderful long future together. I hope that one day far from now your "caring for me" will turn into love. You keeo making odd mentions about your limits, that if I go to cold you don't know how long you'll stick around or even when I was joking (and it really was just a joke) about how I could order you to make Zac dance, you got really serious and said that there are limits.
Was she controlling? Did she push too much?
I don't want to be a bad girlfriend. You took me home early last night and I hope that won't become common. You were sick so I'm going to use that as my rationale which is all it really is. I just have too much time to think at the moment and spilling out all my thoughts is so therapeutic. You were hinting about us finding a hotel room and its half thrilling and half monumental. I don't know when to talk to you about how I feel. (i probably wont). I love you, when that room finds us as its occupants I will be loving you in the full sense of the word.
I hope I don't screw 'us' up. You are so amazing. You make me so unbelievably happy.
Could you stop calling me mate though? I don't mind any of your other nicknames but 'mate' is for your friends.
I'm your girlfriend.
falling,
Will
Last night was more intense than I could ever imagined. I never thought that I would tell you that. Maybe it freaks you out how quickly I shove it to the back of my head. How much I close off something that still haunts me and pretend it didn't happen, that it wasn't a real experience. You admitted that discussions about where we are headed scares the hell out of you...
and
I understand and it makes sense but I hope we have a wonderful long future together. I hope that one day far from now your "caring for me" will turn into love. You keeo making odd mentions about your limits, that if I go to cold you don't know how long you'll stick around or even when I was joking (and it really was just a joke) about how I could order you to make Zac dance, you got really serious and said that there are limits.
Was she controlling? Did she push too much?
I don't want to be a bad girlfriend. You took me home early last night and I hope that won't become common. You were sick so I'm going to use that as my rationale which is all it really is. I just have too much time to think at the moment and spilling out all my thoughts is so therapeutic. You were hinting about us finding a hotel room and its half thrilling and half monumental. I don't know when to talk to you about how I feel. (i probably wont). I love you, when that room finds us as its occupants I will be loving you in the full sense of the word.
I hope I don't screw 'us' up. You are so amazing. You make me so unbelievably happy.
Could you stop calling me mate though? I don't mind any of your other nicknames but 'mate' is for your friends.
I'm your girlfriend.
falling,
Will