the illness was holding on for dear life
Its been a while since I posted anything, and thats because since Thanksgiving, which was my last post, I have been tragically sick. It started as a cold, them moved insidiously through my body into my chest and nestled snuggly in my lungs. And I think I had some flew mixed in with it because at the height, which was like last wednesday, I passed out in my bathroom and threw up a lot and barely had the strength to get out of bed. But like a hard ass fool I only took one day off of work. So that might be why recovery has been coming slow. WInter is upon us, and it is striking hard with frost bitten windows and bitter chills of air filling my lungs. I just hope we don't have another ice storm like there was last winter. I was snowed in for like two days. which wasn't soooo bad, but still. at least the house i live at now is a lot lot warmer, so I can go to bed without fearing I'm not going to wake up in the morning from freezing to death. I swear to God I was afraid of that last year. but anyways, life is moving. ahead.
I also haven't posted because I haven't had a lot to say. I don't want to write boring posts, which I think maybe the last couple of posts have been. This winter just doesn't seem as exciting as the summer that preceded it, but then again, that's the changing of the season. the rest of the world needs time to recuperate and rejuvinate, and I think that is what time it is for me. To be silent and still, and listen to the voices that will give me direction. I think I lack a lot of that these days. I'm thinking in to many directions, and not actually moving towards anything. Or at least, that's how it has felt since like, September.
But happiness is on the way, like tomorrows sunrise, I suppose. I have pondered that sometimes though, what it means to be happy. I've never placed much stock in a "do what makes you happy" mentality, because I don't know that I truly understand what it means to be happy. I think I had a discussion with my roommate Seth about this, and in a sleepy dilirium (much like this one) I said I just want to exist well. THere is no ethereal Shangri-La of happiness, it's all situational. you exist, and whether you exist well, or for ill, is up to you. You have to take from every situation you are given, and eat it, and see what your body makes of it. and whatever happens is up to you. I suppose, but thats maybe a half assed philosophy. Like I said, I haven't been thinking very much lately, just coughing.
I saw Lemony Snickett, and it's awesome. Recomended for children of all ages, regardless if you are alredy of drinking age. Also, I have been going to some shows of local bands, and there are a couple of local bands that are actually pretty good. Unalaska being one of them, even though they have a not so cool name. I know there is a band called Alaska, and I'm not sure what they sound like, but maybe Unalaska is trying to be their antithises (oh woah is my spelling). Regardless, music is good. And sleep is also good, and on that note, I now take my leave of you. Sleep well children of the future, --TOby
I also haven't posted because I haven't had a lot to say. I don't want to write boring posts, which I think maybe the last couple of posts have been. This winter just doesn't seem as exciting as the summer that preceded it, but then again, that's the changing of the season. the rest of the world needs time to recuperate and rejuvinate, and I think that is what time it is for me. To be silent and still, and listen to the voices that will give me direction. I think I lack a lot of that these days. I'm thinking in to many directions, and not actually moving towards anything. Or at least, that's how it has felt since like, September.
But happiness is on the way, like tomorrows sunrise, I suppose. I have pondered that sometimes though, what it means to be happy. I've never placed much stock in a "do what makes you happy" mentality, because I don't know that I truly understand what it means to be happy. I think I had a discussion with my roommate Seth about this, and in a sleepy dilirium (much like this one) I said I just want to exist well. THere is no ethereal Shangri-La of happiness, it's all situational. you exist, and whether you exist well, or for ill, is up to you. You have to take from every situation you are given, and eat it, and see what your body makes of it. and whatever happens is up to you. I suppose, but thats maybe a half assed philosophy. Like I said, I haven't been thinking very much lately, just coughing.
I saw Lemony Snickett, and it's awesome. Recomended for children of all ages, regardless if you are alredy of drinking age. Also, I have been going to some shows of local bands, and there are a couple of local bands that are actually pretty good. Unalaska being one of them, even though they have a not so cool name. I know there is a band called Alaska, and I'm not sure what they sound like, but maybe Unalaska is trying to be their antithises (oh woah is my spelling). Regardless, music is good. And sleep is also good, and on that note, I now take my leave of you. Sleep well children of the future, --TOby