A SIGN OF WEAKNESS
a thousand, nine-hundred and eleven words of pure angst for naomi (onceuponataem).
kai-centric (feat. sulli, taemin and mentions of krystal)
// this is a companion or sequel fic to " a belief in vision". you're welcome. //
( Kai thinks that he never meant for things to change. )
ME ON THE BUS BASICALLY BC I GOT UR TWEET ABT POSTING RIGHT AFTER CLASS AND I READ THIS ON My WAY hOME And I WAS BEYOND DEPRESSED AFTER????
u know i have a big big big soft spot in my heart for jongin :< and you know since a belief in vision i was already hurting for jongin because i mean poor guy he loved soojung and then things just went so wrong and even at the end of a belief in vision there is some closure right and i thought ok jongin will move on AND WELL IM DUMB OBVIOUSLY BECAUSE I PICK THE WRONG PROMPTS AND DSJAFOIJSDFOAI this happened and i also have a huge soft spot for kailli and can i just say the way you wrote this is beyond amazing? the format and like the way it switches feelings here and there idek how to describe it, it's so complex but so simple but perfect? like i can't get over how many powerful emotions you conveyed in literally 1911 words HOW DO YOU DO IT TEACH ME PLEASE
since i'm talking about length, i have to say that i love how short and straightforward this was, and jongin centric and UGH YOU WRITE HIM REALLY WELL U KNOW?? U SHOULD WRITE HIS CHARACTER MORE. like i'm rereading parts as i'm writing this comment and NIKKA I JUST CANT EVEN. how do i pour my soul, my heart out in words, how do i tell you how much i enjoyed this coherently. and i mean it's not that it's angst and i love angst but because it's just so true how hard it is to move on and how he wanted soojung's ghost to kind of haunt him and how he obviously psychologically wanted jinri to be more than just jinri for him. i love it :<
bows because this is probably going into my favourites Y___________________Y the whole what if jongin had met soojung first just kills me because it's so true isn't it?? in life that's all we ask ourselves, how things could be different, maybe for the better and i think that's what holds us back from attaining our true potential because we're so stuck in all the possibilities of life that we miss all the opportunities and chances right under our noses. i can relate so much to jongin, not in the same way, but in the sense that its hard to accept tough situations and digest yours harsh feelings of hurt and moving on, and this:
“I think I’m falling for you.” He tells her this over the phone, honest and calm. And even before Sulli responds, Kai knows the answer to his statement.
He knows because he has yet to accept it.
“I’m not Soojung.”
right in the heart
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I am really really happy to hear that you liked this so much. Writing was actually rather freeing for me since I have been really battling with feelings of sadness/incompetence these days... I identified with Kai a lot in this one to be honest, so to hear that you enjoyed this a lot more that I'd hoped makes me feel good inside.
Hopefully I'll be able to come up with another good one soon but for now, here's my tribute to you Naomi. /hugs
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