thank you for being born
title: thank you for being born
pairing: rap monster/jin
rating: G
genre: fluff, romance
summary: heart-to-heart talks with Jin has always been Namjoon’s favourite thing.
a/n: mostly written by amerithaikong, so it can't really be considered a collab. posting this because she thinks it's horrible but i found it really cute. i had permission from her so don't kill me.
it had been long since they were alone in a room together. usually, in the dorms, taehyung would be around talking to himself, jimin would probably be fighting with jungkook as to whose cooler (namjoon votes jungkook, because jimin is just too noisy), hoseok would probably be scrolling through their twitter and laughing idiotically at the comments and yoongi would be working on his lyrics (or sleeping).
but today, it was just the two of them in a hotel room at China. namjoon had no idea what had gotten into their manager that they managed to get four hotel rooms (so one room for two, and one idiot had to crash with two other idiots), but he was glad when he woke up in the morning to see kim seokjin's face right beside him.
-------------------------------------------------------------namjoon is towelling his hair dry as he steps out of the shower, shutting the door behind him but he stops short when he sees a figure perched on the hotel armchair, book in hand and eyes focused.
seokjin looks up and breaks into a soft smile when he spots namjoon just standing there and gaping wordlessly at him.
"hey," he says easily, and namjoon finally finds it in himself to reply, fingers rubbing at his wet hair.
"what are you doing here?" tumbles out of his mouth before he can stop it, and he flushes a deep red.
"I was about to ask you the same thing," seokjin chuckles, "I thought hyung gave me an empty room until I realised that someone was in the shower."
namjoon shrugs, haphazardly stuffing his soiled clothes into a laundry bag and flopping onto the bed with his laptop in hand. "I thought you'd be babying jungkook tonight since he's sick, he'd probably want to be with you the most right now."
seokjin cringes slightly, eyes crinkled in a smile. "taehyung and jimin offered to take him, I couldn't say no to a night's rest. kookie can be quite a handful when he wants to," he wrinkles his nose, "and he's really picky when he's unwell. that said, I did tell those two how to take proper care of him so hopefully we'll still have a jeon jungkook by tomorrow."
the sound of the laptop turning on fills the temporary silence between them, and seokjin places his book down on a bedside table as he unzips his giant luggage and rummages around in it, odd clanking noises coming somewhere from the bottom.
"it's been pretty long since we were alone together, isn't it?" the vocalist asks, and namjoon nods absentmindedly. too long, he wants to say.
"our parents probably felt a lot like this," he says and seokjin laughs, the sound echoing around the room and into the corners of namjoon's heart. he hasn't heard the elder laugh like this in a really long time.
"sure," seokjin agrees. "being a dad and mom to these guys are more tiring than expected. but worth it all the same."
namjoon doesn't always think it's worth it, mainly because seokjin takes his role as a mother hen very seriously and fusses over all the members while the former gets annoyed at taehyung's 4d self and jimin's noise sometimes, when he's working and they decide it's as good a time as any to disturb him.
but otherwise, he pretty much agrees. jungkook can be a pubertal teenager with unpredictable mood swings and taehyung can be a complete weirdo and jimin can be a noisy asshole and hoseok can be a cool hyung who follows the youngers' every wish and yoongi can be a lazy old man, but namjoon probably wouldn't have it any other way.
seokjin grabs his things and heads off to the toilet with a cheerful "I'm off to shower!" namjoon merely grunts in acknowledgement, opening up the document where he and hoseok had left some lines of rap hanging halfway. it's 1.30am in the morning and he should be turning in but he can't make himself fall asleep without being productive first (drawbacks of being a leader).
he's typing in a quick edit to a line when seokjin calls out above the sound of the running water, "hey, could you get my conditioner for me? it's in the front pocket of my luggage!"
namjoon frowns (like really frowns) because why would seokjin need conditioner when there's everything in the hotel bathroom but he gets it anyway, opening the door and thrusts the bottle at the other until he realises that behind the very fogged up glass, seokjin isn't wearing anything.
namjoon promptly stubs his toe on some godforsaken corner with a (it was really manly, he swears days later when seokjin makes fun of him for it) shriek and almost falls right into the other's very wet, very toned and very tempting arms. but fortunately (or unfortunately, he can't decide), he screeches to a halt just a mere two inches away from seokjin's laughing face and his eyes immediately avert to the ground to observe how pretty the toilet tiles are (which is not at all).
"for god's sake kim namjoon," that dickhead is still laughing, "we've been dating for months and you still can't look me in the eye when I'm naked?"
namjoon sputters. "I'm okay!" he declares to no one in particular, before turning right back around to exit and proceeding to stub his other toe ("FUCK") and leaving the still laughing seokjin and all of his dignity behind.
he can still feel the blush right down his neck as he groans and massages his toes, ignoring the elder's humming and the rush of the water as he settles down in front of his laptop again on his elbows, long body stretched out along the bed. he's scrolling through the fans' replies to their latest tweet when he hears the door click and the padding of feet on the carpeted floor. seokjin's guffaws have died down to a small smile, and namjoon blinks at the huge glasses perched on the bridge of the elder's nose. he knows how much the latter hates wearing them because he thinks he looks terrible with it but namjoon thinks it's quite the contrary.
"I wanted to read my book," seokjin explains as he opens namjoon's laundry bag only to find the tangled mess of clothes inside, clicking his tongue disapprovingly, "and I didn't want to take my contacts in and out but I don't want to be blind either." he dumps all of their laundry on the bed and folds everything up neatly before putting them back in. namjoon had asked him what the point of that was before, and seokjin said he doesn't want to lose his organised life just because he lives with a bunch of sloppy men. namjoon disagrees. he isn't sloppy, he's just practical.
the bed dips down on a side as seokjin clambers on, mimicking namjoon's position as he picks up his book, flipping to the page where he last left off with the help of a bookmark that's actually just a scrap piece of paper which namjoon wanted to throw because the lyrics on it were not satisfactory enough. but seokjin had caught his arm, saying he wanted to keep it, and had laminated it. The younger had asked why yet again, and seokjin shrugs. "I don't know. I don't want to see you throwing your hard work away." namjoon personally cringes everytime he sees the ugly scrawl preserved in the plastic. he'll never understand kim seokjin sometimes.
the two observe a few minutes of silence that is occasionally broken by the typing of a keyboard and the flipping of pages. seokjin's lying close enough for both their shoulders to be pressed up against each other, and it's strangely comfortable to work like this, heat seeping through the material of their shirts and shared between them. namjoon lets his eyes trace the line of seokjin's face, from his hairline down to his curled eyelashes, over the curved tip of his nose, and down to his plump lips which he rolls in as he turns to the next page. the rapper thinks the elder looks perfect like this, bathed in the mix of the bright glow of the laptop screen and the ugly orange lighting in the hotel room, eyes completely focused on the words and glasses slipping off his face.
seokjin looks up just then, and raises a finger to rub at the crease between namjoon's eyebrows. he hadn't realised he was frowning.
"did you hurt your toes that badly?" there is no mocking in the former's voice, only concern. namjoon shakes his head.
"I guess I'm just tired."
"kim namjoon. I've known you long enough to know that there's something up. Are you gonna tell me now or what?"
and truthfully, namjoon doesn't know what's wrong. he's just exhausted, and maybe wondering if he's doing the right things as a leader. to be thrown into this role at twenty years old may be something to be proud of but that doesn't lessen the burden that comes with it.
seokjin's still staring really intensely at him and it's kinda throwing him off his thinking track. He glances down at the elder's lips which are pursed in wait, and ponders.
"can i?" he breathes, and seokjin rolls his eyes so hard namjoon thinks they are going to fall back into his head. And he goes in for it, just a soft peck, but a kiss nonetheless. he pulls away to see seokjin grinning warmly at him, and the other brushes the back of his fingers against namjoon's cheekbone.
"you look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders," seokjin says. namjoon's probably gonna be a hunchback by age twenty five, he figures.
"maybe not the world," the younger admits, "just the weight of the dreams of seven boys."
seokjin brushes the strands of dyed hair out of namjoon's eyes, small smile tugging at his lips. "and the six other boys exist just so you don't have to carry it alone."
"I know," he sighs, "but I'd like to. It's my job."
"with how much you are thinking all the time, I wouldn't be surprised if you could achieve this hair colour without any dye." seokjin says with a chuckle, and namjoon whines in indignance, burying his face into the crook of the elder's neck. seokjin smells nice. he smells like strawberries and something namjoon can't put a finger on. maybe it's home.
"hey," seokjin pulls himself up to a sitting position, and places namjoon's head in his lap. "why not we talk about nice things instead? no more work talk. got it?"
the younger hums in reply, revelling in the comfort of seokjin's thighs and the other cards his fingers lightly through the rough strands of namjoon's hair, arranging each strand carefully into place.
"remember that time when yoongi refused to wake up and we had to carry him in a blanket burrito to the dance studio?"
Of course namjoon remembers. yoongi is the laziest person he knows, only getting up to eat (even that's a chore), write and perhaps pee. and he also weighs a ton when he's sleeping.
seokjin's laughter sound like bells. they tinkle in the crevices of namjoon's brain, and echo in his ears. he thinks it might be therapeutic.
"and the time taehyung taped all of jimin's underwear on the ceiling for some ritual that nobody knew about," the elder says, chuckling. "I honestly thought taehyung was crazy."
"same," namjoon agrees as seokjin's fingers run along his nose, and the bow of his lips. "but now I think he's just special."
"mm," the vocalist cradles namjoon's face with both hands and leans down slowly, kissing each of his eyelids very, very gently, and namjoon feels his insides melt into a gooey mess. His heart is trembling, thumping, fighting against his ribcage and trying to escape into seokjin's hands but namjoon thinks it can't, because it is already there. "our special snowflake."
there's a long beat of silence as seokjin pulls away and namjoon allows his eyes to flutter open, and drink in the elder with his gaze. without makeup, seokjin is still beautiful. his eyes are bright, his smile is soft, and his touch is light. no one treats namjoon like seokjin does, holding him there when he feels like he's going to fall, and making sure that even if he falls, he'll always be able to get back up again. seokjin has no rough edges, only soft, kind ones, and always giving to others even if they can't give back. outside, he's breathtaking, but inside, namjoon thinks, he's a work of art. the younger has done nothing to deserve him, but he still wants to clutch onto this warmth and hold him forever.
"life's been pretty fair to us, hasn't it? it has given us so many things," seokjin says, and yeah, namjoon has to agree.
"our dreams,"
your smile,
"the bunch of idiots sleeping next door,"
your laughter,
"happiness,"
your heart of gold,
"success,"
your unwavering presence,
"and most of all,"
and most of all,
"you."
you.
pairing: rap monster/jin
rating: G
genre: fluff, romance
summary: heart-to-heart talks with Jin has always been Namjoon’s favourite thing.
a/n: mostly written by amerithaikong, so it can't really be considered a collab. posting this because she thinks it's horrible but i found it really cute. i had permission from her so don't kill me.
it had been long since they were alone in a room together. usually, in the dorms, taehyung would be around talking to himself, jimin would probably be fighting with jungkook as to whose cooler (namjoon votes jungkook, because jimin is just too noisy), hoseok would probably be scrolling through their twitter and laughing idiotically at the comments and yoongi would be working on his lyrics (or sleeping).
but today, it was just the two of them in a hotel room at China. namjoon had no idea what had gotten into their manager that they managed to get four hotel rooms (so one room for two, and one idiot had to crash with two other idiots), but he was glad when he woke up in the morning to see kim seokjin's face right beside him.
-------------------------------------------------------------namjoon is towelling his hair dry as he steps out of the shower, shutting the door behind him but he stops short when he sees a figure perched on the hotel armchair, book in hand and eyes focused.
seokjin looks up and breaks into a soft smile when he spots namjoon just standing there and gaping wordlessly at him.
"hey," he says easily, and namjoon finally finds it in himself to reply, fingers rubbing at his wet hair.
"what are you doing here?" tumbles out of his mouth before he can stop it, and he flushes a deep red.
"I was about to ask you the same thing," seokjin chuckles, "I thought hyung gave me an empty room until I realised that someone was in the shower."
namjoon shrugs, haphazardly stuffing his soiled clothes into a laundry bag and flopping onto the bed with his laptop in hand. "I thought you'd be babying jungkook tonight since he's sick, he'd probably want to be with you the most right now."
seokjin cringes slightly, eyes crinkled in a smile. "taehyung and jimin offered to take him, I couldn't say no to a night's rest. kookie can be quite a handful when he wants to," he wrinkles his nose, "and he's really picky when he's unwell. that said, I did tell those two how to take proper care of him so hopefully we'll still have a jeon jungkook by tomorrow."
the sound of the laptop turning on fills the temporary silence between them, and seokjin places his book down on a bedside table as he unzips his giant luggage and rummages around in it, odd clanking noises coming somewhere from the bottom.
"it's been pretty long since we were alone together, isn't it?" the vocalist asks, and namjoon nods absentmindedly. too long, he wants to say.
"our parents probably felt a lot like this," he says and seokjin laughs, the sound echoing around the room and into the corners of namjoon's heart. he hasn't heard the elder laugh like this in a really long time.
"sure," seokjin agrees. "being a dad and mom to these guys are more tiring than expected. but worth it all the same."
namjoon doesn't always think it's worth it, mainly because seokjin takes his role as a mother hen very seriously and fusses over all the members while the former gets annoyed at taehyung's 4d self and jimin's noise sometimes, when he's working and they decide it's as good a time as any to disturb him.
but otherwise, he pretty much agrees. jungkook can be a pubertal teenager with unpredictable mood swings and taehyung can be a complete weirdo and jimin can be a noisy asshole and hoseok can be a cool hyung who follows the youngers' every wish and yoongi can be a lazy old man, but namjoon probably wouldn't have it any other way.
seokjin grabs his things and heads off to the toilet with a cheerful "I'm off to shower!" namjoon merely grunts in acknowledgement, opening up the document where he and hoseok had left some lines of rap hanging halfway. it's 1.30am in the morning and he should be turning in but he can't make himself fall asleep without being productive first (drawbacks of being a leader).
he's typing in a quick edit to a line when seokjin calls out above the sound of the running water, "hey, could you get my conditioner for me? it's in the front pocket of my luggage!"
namjoon frowns (like really frowns) because why would seokjin need conditioner when there's everything in the hotel bathroom but he gets it anyway, opening the door and thrusts the bottle at the other until he realises that behind the very fogged up glass, seokjin isn't wearing anything.
namjoon promptly stubs his toe on some godforsaken corner with a (it was really manly, he swears days later when seokjin makes fun of him for it) shriek and almost falls right into the other's very wet, very toned and very tempting arms. but fortunately (or unfortunately, he can't decide), he screeches to a halt just a mere two inches away from seokjin's laughing face and his eyes immediately avert to the ground to observe how pretty the toilet tiles are (which is not at all).
"for god's sake kim namjoon," that dickhead is still laughing, "we've been dating for months and you still can't look me in the eye when I'm naked?"
namjoon sputters. "I'm okay!" he declares to no one in particular, before turning right back around to exit and proceeding to stub his other toe ("FUCK") and leaving the still laughing seokjin and all of his dignity behind.
he can still feel the blush right down his neck as he groans and massages his toes, ignoring the elder's humming and the rush of the water as he settles down in front of his laptop again on his elbows, long body stretched out along the bed. he's scrolling through the fans' replies to their latest tweet when he hears the door click and the padding of feet on the carpeted floor. seokjin's guffaws have died down to a small smile, and namjoon blinks at the huge glasses perched on the bridge of the elder's nose. he knows how much the latter hates wearing them because he thinks he looks terrible with it but namjoon thinks it's quite the contrary.
"I wanted to read my book," seokjin explains as he opens namjoon's laundry bag only to find the tangled mess of clothes inside, clicking his tongue disapprovingly, "and I didn't want to take my contacts in and out but I don't want to be blind either." he dumps all of their laundry on the bed and folds everything up neatly before putting them back in. namjoon had asked him what the point of that was before, and seokjin said he doesn't want to lose his organised life just because he lives with a bunch of sloppy men. namjoon disagrees. he isn't sloppy, he's just practical.
the bed dips down on a side as seokjin clambers on, mimicking namjoon's position as he picks up his book, flipping to the page where he last left off with the help of a bookmark that's actually just a scrap piece of paper which namjoon wanted to throw because the lyrics on it were not satisfactory enough. but seokjin had caught his arm, saying he wanted to keep it, and had laminated it. The younger had asked why yet again, and seokjin shrugs. "I don't know. I don't want to see you throwing your hard work away." namjoon personally cringes everytime he sees the ugly scrawl preserved in the plastic. he'll never understand kim seokjin sometimes.
the two observe a few minutes of silence that is occasionally broken by the typing of a keyboard and the flipping of pages. seokjin's lying close enough for both their shoulders to be pressed up against each other, and it's strangely comfortable to work like this, heat seeping through the material of their shirts and shared between them. namjoon lets his eyes trace the line of seokjin's face, from his hairline down to his curled eyelashes, over the curved tip of his nose, and down to his plump lips which he rolls in as he turns to the next page. the rapper thinks the elder looks perfect like this, bathed in the mix of the bright glow of the laptop screen and the ugly orange lighting in the hotel room, eyes completely focused on the words and glasses slipping off his face.
seokjin looks up just then, and raises a finger to rub at the crease between namjoon's eyebrows. he hadn't realised he was frowning.
"did you hurt your toes that badly?" there is no mocking in the former's voice, only concern. namjoon shakes his head.
"I guess I'm just tired."
"kim namjoon. I've known you long enough to know that there's something up. Are you gonna tell me now or what?"
and truthfully, namjoon doesn't know what's wrong. he's just exhausted, and maybe wondering if he's doing the right things as a leader. to be thrown into this role at twenty years old may be something to be proud of but that doesn't lessen the burden that comes with it.
seokjin's still staring really intensely at him and it's kinda throwing him off his thinking track. He glances down at the elder's lips which are pursed in wait, and ponders.
"can i?" he breathes, and seokjin rolls his eyes so hard namjoon thinks they are going to fall back into his head. And he goes in for it, just a soft peck, but a kiss nonetheless. he pulls away to see seokjin grinning warmly at him, and the other brushes the back of his fingers against namjoon's cheekbone.
"you look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders," seokjin says. namjoon's probably gonna be a hunchback by age twenty five, he figures.
"maybe not the world," the younger admits, "just the weight of the dreams of seven boys."
seokjin brushes the strands of dyed hair out of namjoon's eyes, small smile tugging at his lips. "and the six other boys exist just so you don't have to carry it alone."
"I know," he sighs, "but I'd like to. It's my job."
"with how much you are thinking all the time, I wouldn't be surprised if you could achieve this hair colour without any dye." seokjin says with a chuckle, and namjoon whines in indignance, burying his face into the crook of the elder's neck. seokjin smells nice. he smells like strawberries and something namjoon can't put a finger on. maybe it's home.
"hey," seokjin pulls himself up to a sitting position, and places namjoon's head in his lap. "why not we talk about nice things instead? no more work talk. got it?"
the younger hums in reply, revelling in the comfort of seokjin's thighs and the other cards his fingers lightly through the rough strands of namjoon's hair, arranging each strand carefully into place.
"remember that time when yoongi refused to wake up and we had to carry him in a blanket burrito to the dance studio?"
Of course namjoon remembers. yoongi is the laziest person he knows, only getting up to eat (even that's a chore), write and perhaps pee. and he also weighs a ton when he's sleeping.
seokjin's laughter sound like bells. they tinkle in the crevices of namjoon's brain, and echo in his ears. he thinks it might be therapeutic.
"and the time taehyung taped all of jimin's underwear on the ceiling for some ritual that nobody knew about," the elder says, chuckling. "I honestly thought taehyung was crazy."
"same," namjoon agrees as seokjin's fingers run along his nose, and the bow of his lips. "but now I think he's just special."
"mm," the vocalist cradles namjoon's face with both hands and leans down slowly, kissing each of his eyelids very, very gently, and namjoon feels his insides melt into a gooey mess. His heart is trembling, thumping, fighting against his ribcage and trying to escape into seokjin's hands but namjoon thinks it can't, because it is already there. "our special snowflake."
there's a long beat of silence as seokjin pulls away and namjoon allows his eyes to flutter open, and drink in the elder with his gaze. without makeup, seokjin is still beautiful. his eyes are bright, his smile is soft, and his touch is light. no one treats namjoon like seokjin does, holding him there when he feels like he's going to fall, and making sure that even if he falls, he'll always be able to get back up again. seokjin has no rough edges, only soft, kind ones, and always giving to others even if they can't give back. outside, he's breathtaking, but inside, namjoon thinks, he's a work of art. the younger has done nothing to deserve him, but he still wants to clutch onto this warmth and hold him forever.
"life's been pretty fair to us, hasn't it? it has given us so many things," seokjin says, and yeah, namjoon has to agree.
"our dreams,"
your smile,
"the bunch of idiots sleeping next door,"
your laughter,
"happiness,"
your heart of gold,
"success,"
your unwavering presence,
"and most of all,"
and most of all,
"you."
you.