(no subject)
this is weird! ok, i feel like i had a lot to say about my life just a minute ago. now that i sit here on my computer, though, i can't articulate what i feel. oh well!
this is weird...
now it seems like it's all about the countdown: until i leave euegene (4 days), and until i leave for spain (22 days! holy cow!)
preparing for going to spain is one thing. let me tell you, trying to pack for 5+ months in... one suitcase is rrrrrreeaallllly hard to do! i just have to keep reminding myself that I'M the one who has to carry it around (duh). since i finished my last final on friday i've been going into my room and just standing there... not even knowing where to start. this isn't the first time i've moved, so why is it so tough this time? i just need to [get off the computer] DO IT. once i start i'm sure it'll be fine.
preparing to leave eugene is like a whole other animal. i don't even know where to start, it's ridiculous. i just wrote out a paragraph and in the process realized how stupid it was, that leaving for 5 months (or 7-8 months from eugene) is not that big of a deal. i know people have been telling me that for a while (patrick, thanks) but i guess now i'm really seeing it. yeah i'll miss you a WHOLE lot but there is no reason to be sad! none! i'll be back.
ok so maybe that's not the reason i'm having a tough time leaving. maybe i'm hiding behind it. i'm nervous. i'm excited. i'm excited-nervous. am i ready for this? will i be able to handle living abroad? i'm nervous because it's something i don't know how to handle,
it's a control thing. at the exact same time it's so exhilirating! it's an adventure! i'm so excited!
that's why it's weird, though. the combo. my mood totally just changed from being all down-trodden about leaving certain people i care a lot about to being super psyched. i gotta get my day started! i gotta keep packing!
one more thing, though. here's what i want: i want to spend time with people that i love. spend time with people that want to spend time with me. in eugene, that means not stressing, keeping opportunities open but not banking on any one activity happening. we need to be mixing packing/moving time with hang out time. no problemo. in santa rosa, it'll be much cooler because hey, i'll already be packed and ready to go! so it's just maximum hang out time.
now i really should get off my rear and GO GO GO!
LOVE
this is weird...
now it seems like it's all about the countdown: until i leave euegene (4 days), and until i leave for spain (22 days! holy cow!)
preparing for going to spain is one thing. let me tell you, trying to pack for 5+ months in... one suitcase is rrrrrreeaallllly hard to do! i just have to keep reminding myself that I'M the one who has to carry it around (duh). since i finished my last final on friday i've been going into my room and just standing there... not even knowing where to start. this isn't the first time i've moved, so why is it so tough this time? i just need to [get off the computer] DO IT. once i start i'm sure it'll be fine.
preparing to leave eugene is like a whole other animal. i don't even know where to start, it's ridiculous. i just wrote out a paragraph and in the process realized how stupid it was, that leaving for 5 months (or 7-8 months from eugene) is not that big of a deal. i know people have been telling me that for a while (patrick, thanks) but i guess now i'm really seeing it. yeah i'll miss you a WHOLE lot but there is no reason to be sad! none! i'll be back.
ok so maybe that's not the reason i'm having a tough time leaving. maybe i'm hiding behind it. i'm nervous. i'm excited. i'm excited-nervous. am i ready for this? will i be able to handle living abroad? i'm nervous because it's something i don't know how to handle,
it's a control thing. at the exact same time it's so exhilirating! it's an adventure! i'm so excited!
that's why it's weird, though. the combo. my mood totally just changed from being all down-trodden about leaving certain people i care a lot about to being super psyched. i gotta get my day started! i gotta keep packing!
one more thing, though. here's what i want: i want to spend time with people that i love. spend time with people that want to spend time with me. in eugene, that means not stressing, keeping opportunities open but not banking on any one activity happening. we need to be mixing packing/moving time with hang out time. no problemo. in santa rosa, it'll be much cooler because hey, i'll already be packed and ready to go! so it's just maximum hang out time.
now i really should get off my rear and GO GO GO!
LOVE