More from mum
The Way Children See Things!
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a
Woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark
naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the
back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd
dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the
garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom
and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming
little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the
toilet a few days ago.
OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a Note from
his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not
necessarily those of his parents."
KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the jar. During
her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer
the phone. "It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her mother. Then
she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's
hitting the bottle."
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker
room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing
towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then
asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy
before?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins,
I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The various
appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs,
unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false
teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of
questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never
believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When saw her
father donning a tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."
SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting
my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they
won't let me talk!"
BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered
through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked
up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been
pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found", the boy
called out." What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young
boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."
This is really an eye opener...Water or Coke?
WATER
1. 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated.
2. In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is often
mistaken for hunger.
3. Even MILD dehydration will slow down one's metabolism as much as 3%.
4. One glass of water will shut down midnight hunger pangs for almost
100% of the dieters studied in a University of Washington study.
5. Lack of water, the #1 trigger of daytime fatigue.
6. Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could
significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers.
7. A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory,
trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on the computer screen
or on a printed page.
8. Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer
by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79%, and one is
50% less likely to develop bladder cancer.
And now for the properties of COKE:
1. In many states (in the USA) the highway patrol carries two gallons of
coke in the truck to remove blood from the highway after a car accident.
2. You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of coke and it will be gone in
two days.
3. To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Coca-Cola into the toilet bowl and
let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid
in Coke removes stains from vitreous China.
4. To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a
rumpled-up piece of aluminum foil dipped in Coca-Cola.
5. To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of
Coca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion.
6. To loosen a rusted bolt: Applying a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola to the
rusted bolt for several minutes.
7. To bake a moist ham: Empty a can of Coca-Cola into the baking pan,
wrap the ham in aluminum foil, and bake. Thirty minutes before the ham
is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the
Coke for a sumptuous brown
gravy.
8. To remove grease from clothes: Empty a can of coke into a load of
greasy clothes, add detergent, and run through a regular cycle. The
Coca-Cola will help loosen grease stains.
9.It will also clean road haze from your windshield.
For Your Info:
1 The active ingredient in Coke is phosphoric acid. Its pH is 2.8. It
will dissolve a nail in about 4 days. Phosphoric acid also leaches
calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase in
osteoporosis.
2. To carry Coca-Cola syrup (the concentrate) the commercial truck must
use the Hazardous material place cards reserved for Highly corrosive
materials.
3. The distributors of coke have been using it to clean the engines of
their trucks for about 20 years!
Now the question is, would you like a coke or a glass of water?