unsettling feeling in my head
tells me I shouldn't fall back asleep. Like something's going to happen. And I have to be awake to stop it. Like someone I know somewhere...is being hurt...and i'm powerless to do anything about it.
you ever get that feeling?
anyway, it's keeping me up.
other news: my phone is out. I don't have the money to get it back on.
I don't have the money for my gas, electricity, cable/internet or even upcoming rent. I don't have that money right now. I'm going to write and send a rent check tomorrow, and pray to god that it doesn't get cashed until the 4th or 5th. I also need to get either a new ridiculous paying job, or a second one that pays a mediocre amount...
...with my schedule thinning out, and with the job I have now (reporting) I really kinda want the latter. Something about working as a journalist I feel is the right thing to do at this moment; if something else comes up, i'll move on it. But for now my wallet speaks for me, and it keeps reminding me i'm useless (financially at least).
"responsibility builds character"
maybe that's a reason I want to try harder
but, maybe the reason is more that I don't want to disappoint you?
I'm so pathetically transparent...
Smile. Breathe. Enjoy time off. I keep telling myself this. I hope it sticks. At the very least, this time with my brothers is amazing for my health; they make me remember how much fun I could have without money. We come up with the craziest shit sometimes; we have fun in spite of the world around us because we know it doesn't want us to.
I'm going to try to fall asleep again.
Goodnight.
-David
"you're better off believing everything you heard was true..."
you ever get that feeling?
anyway, it's keeping me up.
other news: my phone is out. I don't have the money to get it back on.
I don't have the money for my gas, electricity, cable/internet or even upcoming rent. I don't have that money right now. I'm going to write and send a rent check tomorrow, and pray to god that it doesn't get cashed until the 4th or 5th. I also need to get either a new ridiculous paying job, or a second one that pays a mediocre amount...
...with my schedule thinning out, and with the job I have now (reporting) I really kinda want the latter. Something about working as a journalist I feel is the right thing to do at this moment; if something else comes up, i'll move on it. But for now my wallet speaks for me, and it keeps reminding me i'm useless (financially at least).
"responsibility builds character"
maybe that's a reason I want to try harder
but, maybe the reason is more that I don't want to disappoint you?
I'm so pathetically transparent...
Smile. Breathe. Enjoy time off. I keep telling myself this. I hope it sticks. At the very least, this time with my brothers is amazing for my health; they make me remember how much fun I could have without money. We come up with the craziest shit sometimes; we have fun in spite of the world around us because we know it doesn't want us to.
I'm going to try to fall asleep again.
Goodnight.
-David
"you're better off believing everything you heard was true..."