It's New Years Eve
What a year.
After everything that's happened, it's interesting to look back and reflect on what this year has been. It's been much more clear-cut for me than most. I suppose that's one thing I can be thankful of. It was, on this night, last year, that Alex broke the news to me that we were breaking up. My life changed in an awesome way. I was driving home and it was pouring out. I was listening to Enya. Go figure, while not even thinking about it today, I was sitting in the parking-lot, waiting to go into work, and it was absolutely pouring out. It had been all day. Just yesterday I had taken all of my cd's out of my car except for Enya.
Anyway, that wasn't my point. The enya creepyness, I mean.
So much has changed; and while I won't always say it was for the better, the point is, it did change. I'm still here, and that's what's important.
I don't believe in resolutions. I believe in intentions.
I know that my healing is still happening; but I also know that my downside has finally stopped sitting at idle and has begun to make the climb up. Maybe it hasn't, maybe I've just begun to see the world differently, so it seems to.
I know, that for the first time in my life, I'm single and I'm actually okay with that. For those of you who know me, you know this is no meaningless trifle of a thought. Right now, I don't really have any interest in trying to make something work or investing that much energy into a social situation that is so messy. There are a couple of guys that I might not say "no" to, should they express interest, but I'm certainly not waiting for them either. This last semester helped to pave my pathway to move on with me life and has helped focus my goals.
Right now, I'm interested in me: becoming who it is I want and need to be, spending my time doing the things that I enjoy- while I still have the opportunity to do them. I'm focused on my friends (those of you who could be reading this) and trying to be there for them more than I have been. This last year they were there for me, and now it's time to give something back, or at least not ask it so much of them.
My intention for this year is to live a healthier life.
I've already begun to work on that.
I'm eating healthier than I have been, probably ever.
I'm staying active and working harder to do more than I have been.
I'm trying harder to manage my money in a responsible manner so that I can get my life back on track so I can enjoy things when the opportunity arises.
I'm focusing more on school. Hopefully my grades will get even better and I'm working hard to make them at least stay on the track that I've begun.
Tonight, I had the house to myself, I stayed in and ordered myself a pizza, read, played some video games, watched Law and Order and some movies.
I think it was an absolutely perfect New Years.
Happy turn of the year everyone.
May this year be blessed with love, health, opportunity, growth and peace.
♥
After everything that's happened, it's interesting to look back and reflect on what this year has been. It's been much more clear-cut for me than most. I suppose that's one thing I can be thankful of. It was, on this night, last year, that Alex broke the news to me that we were breaking up. My life changed in an awesome way. I was driving home and it was pouring out. I was listening to Enya. Go figure, while not even thinking about it today, I was sitting in the parking-lot, waiting to go into work, and it was absolutely pouring out. It had been all day. Just yesterday I had taken all of my cd's out of my car except for Enya.
Anyway, that wasn't my point. The enya creepyness, I mean.
So much has changed; and while I won't always say it was for the better, the point is, it did change. I'm still here, and that's what's important.
I don't believe in resolutions. I believe in intentions.
I know that my healing is still happening; but I also know that my downside has finally stopped sitting at idle and has begun to make the climb up. Maybe it hasn't, maybe I've just begun to see the world differently, so it seems to.
I know, that for the first time in my life, I'm single and I'm actually okay with that. For those of you who know me, you know this is no meaningless trifle of a thought. Right now, I don't really have any interest in trying to make something work or investing that much energy into a social situation that is so messy. There are a couple of guys that I might not say "no" to, should they express interest, but I'm certainly not waiting for them either. This last semester helped to pave my pathway to move on with me life and has helped focus my goals.
Right now, I'm interested in me: becoming who it is I want and need to be, spending my time doing the things that I enjoy- while I still have the opportunity to do them. I'm focused on my friends (those of you who could be reading this) and trying to be there for them more than I have been. This last year they were there for me, and now it's time to give something back, or at least not ask it so much of them.
My intention for this year is to live a healthier life.
I've already begun to work on that.
I'm eating healthier than I have been, probably ever.
I'm staying active and working harder to do more than I have been.
I'm trying harder to manage my money in a responsible manner so that I can get my life back on track so I can enjoy things when the opportunity arises.
I'm focusing more on school. Hopefully my grades will get even better and I'm working hard to make them at least stay on the track that I've begun.
Tonight, I had the house to myself, I stayed in and ordered myself a pizza, read, played some video games, watched Law and Order and some movies.
I think it was an absolutely perfect New Years.
Happy turn of the year everyone.
May this year be blessed with love, health, opportunity, growth and peace.
♥