Chapter Nineteen
The Lion and the Serpent
Useless Fact: This is the chapter I read first when I got my copy, purely on the basis of the title.
( Read more... )
Useless Fact: This is the chapter I read first when I got my copy, purely on the basis of the title.
( Read more... )
At least with that, it's something almost fair, since a Patronus is useful and something he developed for good (well, protecting himself, which I suppose is close enough.) The Polyjuice bit is like, I don't know, Crabbe getting marks for knowing how to land the most effective punch, or Malfoy getting marks for knowing Evil Spells that his dad taught him.
(note: at university, one gets marks off for an overlong essay)
Seriously. If you're told to write 1'000 words (or in HP terms, I guess, a scroll) and you write double that, I wouldn't consider you highly intelligent. I'd consider you too stupid to listen to the instructions (unless it was liek rilly rebellious not to or something) and too in love with your own thoughts to know when to stop.
Nevertheless, he is hugely biased towards Slytherin and lets them off everything. Indeed, he is obsequiously pally with them all, whereas Gryffindor teachers are Fair and Reasoned in their unqualified sycophancy and praise.
Oh, totally. That's why his favourite calls him sir every other word. Because he tucks them all in at night, and sings them lullabies.
I mean, dude. Snape's never given out a single point, iirc. To anyone. Ever. (Unlike McGonagall, of course.)
As you put it, he's nothing if not consistent.
I do wish he gave less of a shit about Quidditch, though. Still, that's men for you ;)
Heh.
Hermione sounds less like a human being an more like the soulless automaton we all know she is. And by "we all", I mean "you and me".
Hee! We are legion!
Even though Rowling has more or less admitted that Hermione is her self-insert, I wonder if she ever comes out with stuff that sounds like she memorised it out of a book.
*looks both ways* I don't actually buy Rowling as being an intellectual giant herself. I mean, there's the whole 'theory and imagination sucks, don't question authority unless they're liek rilly fat and don't <3 Dumbledore' theme in her books and Hermione to me, is like the Hollywood, layperson (oooh!) idea of a genius: She reads whole books and works an entire level above the rest of her class!
And of course, there's Rowling's style, which is not exactly breaking ground, and the whole borrowing of folklore and history for huge chunks of plot...
Plus, self-inserts are really what people want to be, rather than what they are, imho. I'm betting Rowling wasn't Queen of the Prom or the nearest equivalent (heh, I see her in the Pansy P. role actually - bitter and overdressed, plotting revenge for when I'm A Famous Author ;)
But we can't be allowed to forget how full of herself wonderfully clever Hermione is.
Oh, yes. The hat probably considered her for all four houses.
McGonagall's attempts to be "fair" are as convincing to me as her attempts to be a "strong woman".
Seriously. I could tolerate McGonagall, like a lot of characters, a lot better if I wasn't being force-fed how great she is, and how she's such an example of fairness when she patently isn't. If all the 'McGonagall's soooo strict and unbiased' exposition was dropped, she'd come across a lot more human.
I wonder why none of them went "Behind you!" or made any attempt to prevent this.
Heh. I imagine no-one was too upset at seeing her get hexed, except the presumed fourteen close personal friends. (Dude, if I were Bletchely or whoever, I'd just have fourteen people I know as 'eye-witnesses'.)
Reply
I was always told that when people write reams and reams of stuff in exams, it doesn't mean they have better answers, it just means they've been writing Everything I Know About Thermodynamics or whatever and quite possibly padding out their paper by adding blank sheets and double-spacing. Likewise, an essay which is over the wordcount is usually considered to be full of waffle (although Rowling is a big fan of waffle, it seems). In fact, I would love the next DADA teacher to take Hermione to task for this, with the red pen of d00m.
Hermione to me, is like the Hollywood, layperson (oooh!) idea of a genius: She reads whole books and works an entire level above the rest of her class!
Hermione is what somebody who isn't very bright thinks of as "clever". When you're in school, people who read a lot and get high marks because they're up all hours studying are often considered to have teh_SMRT, but these people never create anything or go on to great works of genius. Genius comes from people finding out how things work when you don't work by conventional standards. Plenty of people regarded as geniuses (genii?) today were people who pissed off their teachers by not following the rules and maybe not knowing the answer. People who do something new. Hermione will never be that person, because she cares about rules more than anything else.
I'm betting Rowling wasn't Queen of the Prom or the nearest equivalent
sistermagpie said that what Hermione actually is is a forty year old woman's idea of what they would have done if they hadn't been so young and stupid. So Hermione comes to the Yule Ball in a "classic" "understated" ballgown and a really boring hairstyle when a real teenager would come in something shiny and Big Hair!, possibly Big Hair with glittery bits. Which is, of course, the natural order of things. Hermione's menopausal soul doesn't actually make her seem more intelligent, just more irritating - but in the book, all the boys <3 her and Viktor Krum wants her as his date (what does he see in her?) even though he's a super 1337 stah and she's an oh-sucks lil' old me ordinary schoolgirl. Vomit.
I could tolerate McGonagall, like a lot of characters, a lot better if I wasn't being force-fed how great she is, and how she's such an example of fairness when she patently isn't.
You mean, every time she appears in a scene? Yes, I do rather think they could tone that down a bit, just like they could tone down Ron's poverty, Hermione's brains and every Slytherin's ugly.
Reply
Heh. I shouldn't really laugh tho, since my summaries aren't exactly concise. Oh well. I'm not getting paid to write.
I would love the next DADA teacher to take Hermione to task for this, with the red pen of d00m.
Oh lord. Then they'd be liek, totally evil!11
Teh Best Evar DADA teacher was Lupin, who adored Harry and Neville and thought Hermione was Teh Smartest!1
There should be some crazy K2K style theory about Hermione in actual fact being forty+. Makes a lot more sense than Ron.
Reply
Leave a comment