Fic: Secrets and Hope. (5/9)
Title: Secrets and Hope - (5/9)
Characters/pairings: Ianto, Jack, Gwen, Rhys, Andy, various other characters introduced in CoE. Jack/Ianto and Gwen/Rhys
Rating: PG, maybe pg13ish in places.
Genre: Happy eneded angst, hurt/comfort.
Summary: As Torchwood rebuilds following the events of CoE the government are still keeping secrets and it's up to Ianto to reveal the truth.
Spoilers: Children of Earth days 4 and 5.
Authors note: A CoE fix-it fic. Compound B67 as a name for Retcon appears in They Keep Killing Suzie. Also dodgy science is dodgy, but no more so than it already is in a lot of Torchwood episodes. I will try to update once a week, but a new baby means my posting schedule could be a bit erratic.
part one
part two
part three
part four
"It doesn't look so bad." Gwen tries to sound optimistic as she look at the large hole that occupies the centre of the Plas now that the Hub has been cleared of debris.
"Not if you like craters," Andy says looking over the barrier beside her, and down into what had been Torchwood three.
"All the lower levels are still intact, including the archives and the central computer system is still working."
"Just needs a bit of paint then." Andy doesn't sound convinced.
"Builders start on Monday." Gwen smiles and shakes her head, before starting to walk across the Plas. After a moment she turns back to Andy, saying, "Well come on then."
Andy follows Gwen to the boarded up tourist office.
The tourist office has been packed up, all the leaflets and maps boxed up, every trace that it was ever used gone. Gwen runs her finger along the desk, leaving a trail in the dust, her expression sad.
After a moment Gwen presses a switch hidden under the desk and the to the side of her wall slides back to reveal a short section of corridor that ends in a flight of stairs.
"We're keeping that, right?" Andy gestures at the wall, looking impressed.
"I guess so." Gwen starts down the stairs, "I've not really thought about it."
The stairway shows very little damage from the blast, only a few small cracks in the stone giving any indication that it has been effected at all.
Andy notices them those and asks as they reach half way, "Are you sure you should be doing this?"
"The baby's not due for another five months, I can walk down some stairs you know," Gwen replies irritably, her tone suggesting that she's already had far too many people telling her what she should and shouldn't be doing.
"I mean wander round a building site." Andy glance around to check that nothing is about to collapse and fall on either of them.
"Somebody has to check that everything's secure and that the builders can't get into the archives or the lower levels."
"I could do it."
"Andy, please. I just need to feel like I'm still useful."
"Oh right. Sorry," Andy apologies and follows Gwen in to the Hub.
The interior of the Hub has been gutted, and no traces of where the workstations or Jack's office were remain. The only familiar feature still present is the dragon mural on the wall, its paint blackened and peeling in places where the fire that followed the bomb blast has got to it.
The lighting and power is still operational in much of the Hub, the central computer system maintaining many of the systems, the back ups and extra shielding which Tosh had installed having protected it from any serious damage.
Gwen checks the doors down to the cells and the archives, opening them then closing them again and resetting the electronic locks and alarms.
They are just about to leave when Andy bends down reaches through the gap in one the gratings that still cover the floor of the main part of the Hub. "Looks like someone lost one of those fancy GPS watches."
"It's Jack's," Gwen says, taking it from Andy before he can protest, and turns the battered vortex manipulator over in her hands, trying not to think about how the dark stains got onto the leather cuff.
Andy is quiet for a moment before asking, "How's he doing?"
"I don't know." Gwen sighs, and puts the vortex manipulator into her coat pocket. "Going to see Martha seemed to help a bit, but he's not the same. He doesn't laugh or joke any more, and I can't remember the last time I saw him smile. It's like I've lost him too."
"Just give him time." Andy puts an arm round her.
"That's what Rhys says," Gwen says wanly.
"I suppose he's got to get it right sometimes, law of averages, right?"
"Andy, don't." Gwen shrugs off his arm, saying irritably, "I know you don't always get on with Rhys, but I really can't be dealing with it right now."
"Okay, shutting up," Andy says good naturedly, before changing the subject and pointing at the pocket where Gwen had put the vortex manipulator, asking "So what you going to do with it?"
Gwen thinks for a moment before replying, "Try to get it fixed I suppose. Martha will probably know somebody who can help."
"What about Johnson? She might know somebody," Andy says as they start to walk back towards the stairs up the old tourist office.
"I'm not sure I want the sort of people who Johnson knows knowing about this." Gwen sets the door alarm behind them as they leave, "I mean I trust her and Lois, but the people she worked for I don't know them, and I don't want to."
"You didn't used to be like this you know," Andy says, "You used to trust people."
"Maybe I'm just seeing things as they really are now." Gwen smiles sadly as she presses the button to close the wall behind them, shutting off the Hub once more. "I used to think Ianto was being miserable when he said things like that, but he was right, Torchwood changes you."
* * *
Christmas has already gone when the package finally arrives, the UNIT officer looking a little confused at why he's delivering a small box to a house in Cardiff.
Once he has gone, Gwen opens the box and smiles. Inside is the vortex manipulator, the leather cleaned and the broken cover on the panel inside replaced, a note from Martha placed along side it.
Gwen,
Hope you're keeping well, and I'm sorry I can't make it to your New Years party, we're still run off our feet here, the clean up operation from the 456 is taking forever.
Professor Taylor says that he's fixed as much of the vortex manipulator as he can, I think he was sorry to have to hand it back, he was absolutely fascinated by it.
How is Jack doing these days? I've not heard from him since his visit.
Hope to be able to visit soon,
Martha.
Putting the note in her pocket, Gwen phones Jack to make sure he'll be at the party that evening.
* * *
The New Years party is in full swing, Bananaboat trying to convince Rhys to let him make cocktails for everybody when Gwen finally gets a moment alone with Jack.
"I've got a surprise for you." Gwen takes hold of Jack's hand, getting him to follow her into the kitchen and away from the rest of the guests. "Close your eyes."
"I didn't know it was that sort of party." The humour is forced and the smile that accompanies it strained.
"It's not. Now close you eyes."
Jack opens his eyes as he feels Gwen buckle the vortex manipulator about his wrist, and looks at her with amazement before hugging her tightly.
"Where did you find it?" Jack is smiling faintly as he runs a finger across the worn leather, "I didn't think I'd ever see it again."
"I didn't, Andy found it just before the builders started work on the Hub. I'd wanted to give it to you at Christmas, but it wasn't fixed," Gwen says apologetically, before adding, "Maybe this is better though, a new year, a new start."
"Yeah." Jack's voice is thick with emotion, "A new start."
"Martha called in some favours, got the teleporter part of it fixed." Gwen opens the panel on the cuff, to show Jack where the cracked glass cover has been replaced. "It's not completely fixed, there was a lot of things that Martha said they had no idea what they did, so they left them as they were."
"The Doctor didn't help then?" Jacks expression is unreadable, although there's a trace of hope in his voice.
"No, I don't think Martha contacted him about it."
"Didn't think so," Jack says sadly, closing it again. "The Doctor broke it you know, not the explosion."
"I'm sure he didn't mean to." Gwen puts her hand on Jack's arm, "Accidents happen."
"He meant to." There's anger in Jack' voice now, "If he hadn't maybe we wouldn't have lost Tosh or Owen. I could have taken Tosh to the hospital, or got Owen out before-" Jack pauses sounding choked, "And Ianto I could have saved him, and Steven, I could have found another way. Now it's too late."
"Oh Jack, it's never too late. There are still so people we can help."
"Why?" Jack says bleakly, eyes wet with unshed tears, "There's no one left."
Gwen can't keep the hurt from her face as Jack turns and walks away, letting himself out of the house.
Standing alone in Gwen and Rhys' small back garden Jack looks up at the sky, the stars above him lost in a blur of tears.
* * *
Christmas and then New Year come and go at the Audley Clinic with no opportunity for escape. It's lonely and miserable time despite the fact that Ruth visits him most days and Ianto can feel any hope that he had of seeing Jack and his friends and family start to fade.
Ruth has become his lifeline to the outside world, bringing him newspapers and books on some of her visits, as well as trusting him with much of the research information.
The realisation that Ruth is as lonely as he is came just before Christmas when he'd asked what she was doing with her days off, and she'd replied that she wasn't taking any Christmas holiday this year as she'd just be sat at home on her own.
The new year does however provide new information as Ruth continues to bring Ianto medical report, having overcome her original reservation about allowing Ianto to see the other patients notes.
"There is one strange thing," Ruth says, flicking through the pages until she reaches the toxicology report, "All the survivors have an unknown compound present in their bloodstream."
"Unknown?" Ianto gives her a questioning look.
"Well not exactly unknown, it's being flagged up as classified compound B67. We've not been able to get anymore information than that." Ruth hands Ianto the report, "Everything that we've found so far points to the information having been lost a few years ago when the archives at Torchwood London were lost. Not that they've have shared it with us anyway."
"Compound B67?" Ianto looks at the report, shocked. It makes no sense at all, why would all the survivors have been exposed to Retcon? There has been no opportunity or reason for the Retcon to have been administered to any of them since the attack, even if the Audley Clinic knew what it was, which only leaves the option that it had been taken before.
"From what we've been able to determine about B67, that it's reacts with certain proteins associated with memory formation. Our current theory is that virus has a permanent effect on brain chemistry, it would seem to fit with its rapid onset, that it shuts down brain functions first which is why it's so rapidly fatal in most cases."
"Doctor Munro is talking about taking brain tissue samples to confirm it," she adds with distaste.
"No." Ianto doesn't want to share this information with them, but if it prevents somebody, especially as he's got a 1 in 14 chance of it being him, from getting their brain poked about with he'll do it. "I know what it is."
"You do?" Ruth gives him a curious look.
"Compound B67 is nothing to do with the 456, it's the official name for a substance that causes amnesia. Torchwood One invented it, called it Retcon. They used it to stop the public finding out about aliens."
"So all the survivors have had part of their memory wiped at some point?" Ruth shakes her head, "Talk about unlucky."
"They survived," Ianto says flatly, the realisation that it had, in a way, been Jack that had saved him after all starting to sink in. They'd all had a couple of missing days back the previous year, and Jack had signed the paperwork for the Retcon, with a warning that they shouldn't try to get back those memories, ever.
"You don't sound very happy about that," Ruth says, sounding confused. "Or didn't you know that you'd had been given B67 until now?"
"I knew." Ianto closes his eyes, remembering waking up at the boardroom table, Tosh, Owen and Gwen, still asleep around him, and being more worried by the fact that Jack wasn't with them than what had happened to himself.
"Is that the problem?"
"No, you wouldn't understand." Ianto turns away hoping that Ruth will take the hint and leave him alone with the memories of him and Jack holding each other tightly, trying to calm their fears of what could have happened in those missing days. Some things are still too private for Ianto to want to open up to anybody about, especially as he's still not sure how he feels about some of those things himself. It's not embarrassment or shame that makes him want to keep it private it's because what he has - had - with Jack is special, it's theirs alone,
"I could try." Ruth smiles encouragingly at him, "I don't think there's much left that surprises or shocks me these days."
Ianto shakes his head. He appreciates what she is trying to do, she is after all the nearest thing he has to a friend, and if the circumstances were different he knows might consider talking to her about it.
"Well I'm here if you change your mind."
"I know." Ianto forces a smile, experience having taught him that it's the best tactic in convincing people he's fine when he's really not. "Now let’s see if we can find out where the people came in contact with the Retcon, maybe the quantity of the dose they received has an effect how well they resisted the virus.”
Working like this isn’t perfect, it’s far from it, but it’s a good distraction from what feels like a hopeless situation, and at the moment Ianto thinks that the best he can hope for.
part six
Characters/pairings: Ianto, Jack, Gwen, Rhys, Andy, various other characters introduced in CoE. Jack/Ianto and Gwen/Rhys
Rating: PG, maybe pg13ish in places.
Genre: Happy eneded angst, hurt/comfort.
Summary: As Torchwood rebuilds following the events of CoE the government are still keeping secrets and it's up to Ianto to reveal the truth.
Spoilers: Children of Earth days 4 and 5.
Authors note: A CoE fix-it fic. Compound B67 as a name for Retcon appears in They Keep Killing Suzie. Also dodgy science is dodgy, but no more so than it already is in a lot of Torchwood episodes. I will try to update once a week, but a new baby means my posting schedule could be a bit erratic.
part one
part two
part three
part four
"It doesn't look so bad." Gwen tries to sound optimistic as she look at the large hole that occupies the centre of the Plas now that the Hub has been cleared of debris.
"Not if you like craters," Andy says looking over the barrier beside her, and down into what had been Torchwood three.
"All the lower levels are still intact, including the archives and the central computer system is still working."
"Just needs a bit of paint then." Andy doesn't sound convinced.
"Builders start on Monday." Gwen smiles and shakes her head, before starting to walk across the Plas. After a moment she turns back to Andy, saying, "Well come on then."
Andy follows Gwen to the boarded up tourist office.
The tourist office has been packed up, all the leaflets and maps boxed up, every trace that it was ever used gone. Gwen runs her finger along the desk, leaving a trail in the dust, her expression sad.
After a moment Gwen presses a switch hidden under the desk and the to the side of her wall slides back to reveal a short section of corridor that ends in a flight of stairs.
"We're keeping that, right?" Andy gestures at the wall, looking impressed.
"I guess so." Gwen starts down the stairs, "I've not really thought about it."
The stairway shows very little damage from the blast, only a few small cracks in the stone giving any indication that it has been effected at all.
Andy notices them those and asks as they reach half way, "Are you sure you should be doing this?"
"The baby's not due for another five months, I can walk down some stairs you know," Gwen replies irritably, her tone suggesting that she's already had far too many people telling her what she should and shouldn't be doing.
"I mean wander round a building site." Andy glance around to check that nothing is about to collapse and fall on either of them.
"Somebody has to check that everything's secure and that the builders can't get into the archives or the lower levels."
"I could do it."
"Andy, please. I just need to feel like I'm still useful."
"Oh right. Sorry," Andy apologies and follows Gwen in to the Hub.
The interior of the Hub has been gutted, and no traces of where the workstations or Jack's office were remain. The only familiar feature still present is the dragon mural on the wall, its paint blackened and peeling in places where the fire that followed the bomb blast has got to it.
The lighting and power is still operational in much of the Hub, the central computer system maintaining many of the systems, the back ups and extra shielding which Tosh had installed having protected it from any serious damage.
Gwen checks the doors down to the cells and the archives, opening them then closing them again and resetting the electronic locks and alarms.
They are just about to leave when Andy bends down reaches through the gap in one the gratings that still cover the floor of the main part of the Hub. "Looks like someone lost one of those fancy GPS watches."
"It's Jack's," Gwen says, taking it from Andy before he can protest, and turns the battered vortex manipulator over in her hands, trying not to think about how the dark stains got onto the leather cuff.
Andy is quiet for a moment before asking, "How's he doing?"
"I don't know." Gwen sighs, and puts the vortex manipulator into her coat pocket. "Going to see Martha seemed to help a bit, but he's not the same. He doesn't laugh or joke any more, and I can't remember the last time I saw him smile. It's like I've lost him too."
"Just give him time." Andy puts an arm round her.
"That's what Rhys says," Gwen says wanly.
"I suppose he's got to get it right sometimes, law of averages, right?"
"Andy, don't." Gwen shrugs off his arm, saying irritably, "I know you don't always get on with Rhys, but I really can't be dealing with it right now."
"Okay, shutting up," Andy says good naturedly, before changing the subject and pointing at the pocket where Gwen had put the vortex manipulator, asking "So what you going to do with it?"
Gwen thinks for a moment before replying, "Try to get it fixed I suppose. Martha will probably know somebody who can help."
"What about Johnson? She might know somebody," Andy says as they start to walk back towards the stairs up the old tourist office.
"I'm not sure I want the sort of people who Johnson knows knowing about this." Gwen sets the door alarm behind them as they leave, "I mean I trust her and Lois, but the people she worked for I don't know them, and I don't want to."
"You didn't used to be like this you know," Andy says, "You used to trust people."
"Maybe I'm just seeing things as they really are now." Gwen smiles sadly as she presses the button to close the wall behind them, shutting off the Hub once more. "I used to think Ianto was being miserable when he said things like that, but he was right, Torchwood changes you."
* * *
Christmas has already gone when the package finally arrives, the UNIT officer looking a little confused at why he's delivering a small box to a house in Cardiff.
Once he has gone, Gwen opens the box and smiles. Inside is the vortex manipulator, the leather cleaned and the broken cover on the panel inside replaced, a note from Martha placed along side it.
Gwen,
Hope you're keeping well, and I'm sorry I can't make it to your New Years party, we're still run off our feet here, the clean up operation from the 456 is taking forever.
Professor Taylor says that he's fixed as much of the vortex manipulator as he can, I think he was sorry to have to hand it back, he was absolutely fascinated by it.
How is Jack doing these days? I've not heard from him since his visit.
Hope to be able to visit soon,
Martha.
Putting the note in her pocket, Gwen phones Jack to make sure he'll be at the party that evening.
* * *
The New Years party is in full swing, Bananaboat trying to convince Rhys to let him make cocktails for everybody when Gwen finally gets a moment alone with Jack.
"I've got a surprise for you." Gwen takes hold of Jack's hand, getting him to follow her into the kitchen and away from the rest of the guests. "Close your eyes."
"I didn't know it was that sort of party." The humour is forced and the smile that accompanies it strained.
"It's not. Now close you eyes."
Jack opens his eyes as he feels Gwen buckle the vortex manipulator about his wrist, and looks at her with amazement before hugging her tightly.
"Where did you find it?" Jack is smiling faintly as he runs a finger across the worn leather, "I didn't think I'd ever see it again."
"I didn't, Andy found it just before the builders started work on the Hub. I'd wanted to give it to you at Christmas, but it wasn't fixed," Gwen says apologetically, before adding, "Maybe this is better though, a new year, a new start."
"Yeah." Jack's voice is thick with emotion, "A new start."
"Martha called in some favours, got the teleporter part of it fixed." Gwen opens the panel on the cuff, to show Jack where the cracked glass cover has been replaced. "It's not completely fixed, there was a lot of things that Martha said they had no idea what they did, so they left them as they were."
"The Doctor didn't help then?" Jacks expression is unreadable, although there's a trace of hope in his voice.
"No, I don't think Martha contacted him about it."
"Didn't think so," Jack says sadly, closing it again. "The Doctor broke it you know, not the explosion."
"I'm sure he didn't mean to." Gwen puts her hand on Jack's arm, "Accidents happen."
"He meant to." There's anger in Jack' voice now, "If he hadn't maybe we wouldn't have lost Tosh or Owen. I could have taken Tosh to the hospital, or got Owen out before-" Jack pauses sounding choked, "And Ianto I could have saved him, and Steven, I could have found another way. Now it's too late."
"Oh Jack, it's never too late. There are still so people we can help."
"Why?" Jack says bleakly, eyes wet with unshed tears, "There's no one left."
Gwen can't keep the hurt from her face as Jack turns and walks away, letting himself out of the house.
Standing alone in Gwen and Rhys' small back garden Jack looks up at the sky, the stars above him lost in a blur of tears.
* * *
Christmas and then New Year come and go at the Audley Clinic with no opportunity for escape. It's lonely and miserable time despite the fact that Ruth visits him most days and Ianto can feel any hope that he had of seeing Jack and his friends and family start to fade.
Ruth has become his lifeline to the outside world, bringing him newspapers and books on some of her visits, as well as trusting him with much of the research information.
The realisation that Ruth is as lonely as he is came just before Christmas when he'd asked what she was doing with her days off, and she'd replied that she wasn't taking any Christmas holiday this year as she'd just be sat at home on her own.
The new year does however provide new information as Ruth continues to bring Ianto medical report, having overcome her original reservation about allowing Ianto to see the other patients notes.
"There is one strange thing," Ruth says, flicking through the pages until she reaches the toxicology report, "All the survivors have an unknown compound present in their bloodstream."
"Unknown?" Ianto gives her a questioning look.
"Well not exactly unknown, it's being flagged up as classified compound B67. We've not been able to get anymore information than that." Ruth hands Ianto the report, "Everything that we've found so far points to the information having been lost a few years ago when the archives at Torchwood London were lost. Not that they've have shared it with us anyway."
"Compound B67?" Ianto looks at the report, shocked. It makes no sense at all, why would all the survivors have been exposed to Retcon? There has been no opportunity or reason for the Retcon to have been administered to any of them since the attack, even if the Audley Clinic knew what it was, which only leaves the option that it had been taken before.
"From what we've been able to determine about B67, that it's reacts with certain proteins associated with memory formation. Our current theory is that virus has a permanent effect on brain chemistry, it would seem to fit with its rapid onset, that it shuts down brain functions first which is why it's so rapidly fatal in most cases."
"Doctor Munro is talking about taking brain tissue samples to confirm it," she adds with distaste.
"No." Ianto doesn't want to share this information with them, but if it prevents somebody, especially as he's got a 1 in 14 chance of it being him, from getting their brain poked about with he'll do it. "I know what it is."
"You do?" Ruth gives him a curious look.
"Compound B67 is nothing to do with the 456, it's the official name for a substance that causes amnesia. Torchwood One invented it, called it Retcon. They used it to stop the public finding out about aliens."
"So all the survivors have had part of their memory wiped at some point?" Ruth shakes her head, "Talk about unlucky."
"They survived," Ianto says flatly, the realisation that it had, in a way, been Jack that had saved him after all starting to sink in. They'd all had a couple of missing days back the previous year, and Jack had signed the paperwork for the Retcon, with a warning that they shouldn't try to get back those memories, ever.
"You don't sound very happy about that," Ruth says, sounding confused. "Or didn't you know that you'd had been given B67 until now?"
"I knew." Ianto closes his eyes, remembering waking up at the boardroom table, Tosh, Owen and Gwen, still asleep around him, and being more worried by the fact that Jack wasn't with them than what had happened to himself.
"Is that the problem?"
"No, you wouldn't understand." Ianto turns away hoping that Ruth will take the hint and leave him alone with the memories of him and Jack holding each other tightly, trying to calm their fears of what could have happened in those missing days. Some things are still too private for Ianto to want to open up to anybody about, especially as he's still not sure how he feels about some of those things himself. It's not embarrassment or shame that makes him want to keep it private it's because what he has - had - with Jack is special, it's theirs alone,
"I could try." Ruth smiles encouragingly at him, "I don't think there's much left that surprises or shocks me these days."
Ianto shakes his head. He appreciates what she is trying to do, she is after all the nearest thing he has to a friend, and if the circumstances were different he knows might consider talking to her about it.
"Well I'm here if you change your mind."
"I know." Ianto forces a smile, experience having taught him that it's the best tactic in convincing people he's fine when he's really not. "Now let’s see if we can find out where the people came in contact with the Retcon, maybe the quantity of the dose they received has an effect how well they resisted the virus.”
Working like this isn’t perfect, it’s far from it, but it’s a good distraction from what feels like a hopeless situation, and at the moment Ianto thinks that the best he can hope for.
part six