Once upon a time....
Once upon a time we were a family. And I know that yes they will always be with me. This is along the line what people have been saying, but that is hard to say when you still have a parent(s) who are still physically with you. Who can still give you advice and hug you and spend holidays with, etc. It is just not the same.
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It has been just over 10 days since Mom died.
Life seems to suck.
I am sleeping not through the night, but off and on throughout the day. I usually catch a few hours in bed and a few later on in the day on the couch.
I need to clean
I need to make cookies
I need to finish reading my book club book. That will get done tomorrow.
I need to figure a lot of things out.
There are a lot of big decisions coming up at the first of the new year.
I am selling the house. Sadly, I cannot afford to stay and that sucks. I have no clue where I am going to go, or what it is I am even looking for.
I just want to crawl in a hole and go to sleep only to emerge the way things were before all the shit hit the fan.
I just miss my parents.
It is crazy to miss someone so much that you physically hurt. And the icing on the cake is that I won't see them again until (hopefully) many years down the line after I die and that is if there actually is a place we will all be together in. But if I do see them outside of pictures before that day comes, I've gone crazy. What a shitty deal. Could the double bladed sword get any sharper?
I just miss my parents.