(Untitled)

[taco_belle_fred]

Where: outside of the hotel where Wesley resides
When: Late afternoon, September 11th
Who: Fred, Wesley, whoever might be nearby
What: Making an attempt at mending old friendships

Comments

[_wes_pryce_]

After his not so little run in with Faith, Wesley had taken the longer route home. Well, if one could call a shady hotel room home. Home is where the heart is, Wesley remember that line painted on some stupid little tile at this grandmother. He thought it was a unrealistic saying back then when he was eight, as he did now. It pretty much sucked if you found out your heart didn't have a home, because it wasn't really wanted anywhere.

The night didn't get any better by taking the long route home. One of his informants assured him there was a rumor going around that Angel, vampire with a soul was back in town. Wesley these days thought of him as Angel, vampire with a pillow. He really didn't like the idea of a watching meaty, strong arm suddenly flash out from behind a tree to strangle him.

He was still thinking about that, and about whether or not he should tell Giles about Faith as he hobbled his way back to the hotel. At least he'd gotten rid of some frustration by tearing into a group of teen-age vampires. Of course them looking like teen-agers didn't mean they were teen-agers. Still, not as naive as he once had been, Wesley had done alright.

He was still alive, he was still walking more or less, and his brain was still going on overdrive. Did Giles know about Faith being in town? Did they hear the rumors about Angel. Would there be any hot water left in the blasted hotel shower. And did actually re-supply his suture kit when he'd did the routine check up of his first-aid box. A wise thing to carry around with his job.

Those thoughts came to a screeching halt when he noticed a shadow moving about in front of his hotel room. To small to be either Giles or Angel. To...Well, it wasn't Cordelia, obviously. And from the hesitant way she moved it couldn't be Buffy either. Or Willow, not that he was expecting to see the witch any time soon.

Wesley was still surprised when he drew cautiously near to find it was Fred. It was all for noting! Don't come back to the hotel. Ever. The silver key to his apartment that had always been at the hotel still glistened painfully in his dreams. Locked out of their lives, their hearts, his place in the world.

"Fred," he rasped, stepping half out of the shadows to appear beside her. "Did you get lost? Whatever will they way at the resistance about that."

[taco_belle_fred]

Had she expected a warmer welcome? No, but it still stung a little bit. Fred would have given anything to turn back time, stop the false prophecy before it ruined everyone, but she couldn’t and that made her feel incredibly helpless.

“Wesley,” Her voice was smaller than she had intended it to be. She smiled, but her nerves made the expression falter and eventually disappear altogether.

“I just…” She trailed off for a moment or two, clasping her hands together from nerves. She certainly hadn’t thought that this would be easy, but she didn’t think that she would have such trouble with the speaking part.

“I thought I’d come see you. See how you are and…” She let out a heavy sigh, choosing not to continue the sentence. Her lips seemed to twitch just a little bit but the twitch soon brought about a smile, a hopeful one, and she prayed that it would melt the ice between them if only just a little bit.

[_wes_pryce_]

Wesley kept a save distance as he kept looking at Fred. He wasn't about to fall into that trap again. He wasn't about to get close - be that physically or mentally - to anyone again from here on end. Well, from the moment Fred had told him never to come back.

Before that he'd held on to some hope. Even after Angel tried to smother him with a pillow. He'd kept looking at the door of his hospital room. Wishing Cordelia would walk in, rip him a new one and then ask his side of the story. Waiting for Gunn to come in and do that elaborate handshake, tell him he was a fool but they'd figure it out. Instead Fred had shown up with a metaphorical knife and thrust it into his heart.

To hear the women he had - used to have - a crush on tell him to never come back with so much disgust in her voice? Wesley might never get over that and found he didn't want to either. No, things were better this way.

Didn't mean he could stop worrying about his friends.

Narrowing his eyes he kept quiet while she tried to stammer out a reason as to why she was here. On this side of town no less. The bad side of town.

"You just what?" he asked softly, shifting from one foot to the other. What he wanted was a hot, hot shower, tend to his bruises and cuts and then sleep for a very long time. Not stand here in the dark where it was dangerous and listening to a stammering Fred.

Liar. You're such a liar, Pryce. You're even convincing yourself. Inner voices, Wesley decided, really were a nuisance sometimes.

Spreading his arms wide once she finally managed to get some of her words out, he gave her a sarcastic smile. "Here I am. And I'm fine, see? Satisfied? Not dead yet, so you can run back to Angel and assure him he still has a chance if he wishes to bother himself with it."

[taco_belle_fred]

Her hopeful smile melted into a frown. The way he spoke make her heart hurt, but she could hardly blame him. The thought that his attitude had been brought about by her own words and actions hurt even more, but she swallowed the lump in her throat and pressed on.

“I didn’t mean to…” Fred looked at Wesley with her sad brown eyes, not really intending to induce sympathy. It was harder than she’d originally thought to speak with him. It wasn’t at all the way she imagined it. She’d wanted all of their troubles to be water under the bridge. She wanted them to have a warm reunion, but now that she was actually there in that moment it was obvious that that wasn’t going to come about too easily.

“I never meant to hurt you, Wesley.” Her voice had become soft, a meek little whisper.

[hunk_nightthing]

"But I meant to," Angel said, his voice emerging from the shadows just within the hotel. The vampire remained hidden from sight. He hadn't meant to speak. He hadn't wished to be seen or reveal his presence until a more appropriate time. But Wesley's words and demeanor were a knife to his heart.

His pain was constant and unbearable. So much loss, so much senseless destruction. His own beloved infant son gone forever, replaced by a hateful teen intent upon his own father's destruction.

Wesley had saved him from the depths of the ocean, and an eternity of soundless blue and ravenous hunger. Judas hero, former best friend, betrayer, feeding Angel his own life's blood...

Angel had something he needed to say even if it got rejected and thrown back in his face. There were words he had to speak, to unburden his guilt, to assuage his grief...

"It was a mistake. It was all a terrible mistake. I know that you were trying to save Connor..." Angel choked on a sob, his throat filling with tears. He hadn't just lost his son. He'd lost his best friend.

"I'm sorry."

Abruptly, Angel turned on his heel, the sudden movement revealing the vampire's hiding spot. Without waiting for a reply, Angel retreated into the depths of the hotel.

[_wes_pryce_]

If wishes were horses. If he could wish Wesley would go back in time, knowing what he'd knew now and change everything. But he hadn't known everything. And he knew that if he went back in time with the same fact, with the same damn prophecy, with the same threat hovering over all of them? He'd do exactly the same.

He had expected Angel to be furious and beyond reason. Wesley knew the vampire better then most everyone, bar Cordelia. He knew there was a good chance he'd be dead. Still, a strong vampire like Angel using a pillow? When he could move so fast that he could've snapped Wesley's neck within the blink of an eye.

What he hadn't expected was the rest dropping him like a stone. That, he hadn't been prepared for. He opened his mouth to tell Fred exactly that. Tell her what an admirable job she'd done of hurting him anyway and how much it didn't matter any longer when he new voice rang out.

One that made him involuntarily take a step back and pull a stake out. Not that he'd actually dust Angel, but this time he was prepared. No one, no one was going to catch him by surprise ever again.

Blue eyes darted from Angel to Fred and back again while the vampire talked. He felt another wall of ice slam up in place, protecting himself from any future pain that his friends being here could cause. Wesley though he had it oh so well covered.

Until Angel apologized.

And then walked away again. Ran away again.

"I never pegged you as a coward, Angel. " he called after the vampire, not raising his voice. After all, why have supernatural hearing and not use it? “And yet here you are, running away again. Are you afraid I might accept the apology? Or refuse it?”

His eyes darted back toward Fred, a painful, wry smile slipping on his face. "You'd better go after him. Your fearless leader looks in need of his friends." There was no malice in his voice, but he knew better then to not face reality. There would be no place for him in his former family. Not anymore.

They'd never trust him, and he couldn't deal with that.

[taco_belle_fred]

Fred nearly jumped right out of her skin, surprised by Angel’s presence. That’s what vampires were good at, though, wasn’t it? Lurking and looming in the shadows only to pop out of the blue and take someone, usually a victim, by surprise. She almost smiled when he apologized to Wesley, but the occasion was too somber for such cheery expressions.

But then Angel retreated. She was disappointed by that, almost sure that perseverance could break down those cold icy walls Wesley had put up. Angel didn’t seem to be in the mood for persevering.

Fred sighed, feeling like her heart was sinking, and even though she fought them off as much as she could, her brown eyes welled up with tears. Merely blinking, she destroyed them before they could run down her cheek as evidence that she was weak.

“I’m so, so sorry.” She whispered, sniffling a little bit. She gave Wesley a nod, her own quiet ‘goodbye’, and walked, following Angel’s path.

[hunk_nightthing]

Angel turned in the hallway so that Winifred could join him. The vampire gazed down at her with sorrowful dark eyes, reaching out to briefly touch her shoulder. The contact was both fleeting and tender. Angel held the young woman in a special place in his heart. Her vulnerability invoked both his protectiveness and his sense of heroism.

His fingers stroked downward, slipping from Fred's shoulder, and Angel found his gaze turning back toward Wesley. He knew that the Englishman loved Fred. How he could stand to hurt her like this was a baffling mystery.

Time to call the other man's bluff.

"Go ahead, accept my apology. If you refuse then the only thing keeping you from coming home is that colossal chip on your shoulder, Wes."

[_wes_pryce_]

Another wall of ice was slammed around Wesley's heart at the look in Fred's eyes. By now he'd recognized what he'd felt for Fred as a need to love and be loved. If it couldn't have been Cordelia, or Angel or Gunn then maybe Fred could be the one to make him feel less lonely. He knew now that would've been wrong for Fred, wasn't what she needed at all.

Didn't mean he took any pleasure in hurting her. But he had to, or he'd be the one who'd end up hurting again. And it wasn't anything they'd not said to him first, a very childish voice in his head told him.

He watched her join Angel, watched Angel reach out and comfort the woman, watched part of the family he once had. Thought he had, but in the end had build upon lies.

Just he was about to turn around and go back to his room, stake slipping back into his pocket, he felt Angel's eyes on him. Bitter eyes glanced back, Wesley's face a carefully created mask of indifference. Anyone who knew him well would be able to see behind the mask.

But not even his best friend had known him that well, as the past had proven.

"Home?" For a moment he sound and looked wistful. Just for a second, it was gone before anyone could probably see it.

"I thought I had a home once," he whispered, eyes sliding from Angel to Fred and back again. "It turned out to be nothing but lies. One has to wonder if my accepting your apology is more important to your state of mind, Angel. Or because you actually desire to embrace the lost, betraying son back into the bosom of the family."

Wesley wanted to go back. He wanted it badly. He was lonely, he'd always been lonely. But he'd always been able to cover it up. Not anymore though. His reality check hadn't bounced this time.

"Oh, and Angel?" He turned around in front of his hotel room and looked back at the pair. "Faith is in town and she's happily joined Willow's side. I get the impression she'll come looking for you soon."

Once again dark eyes slide from one former friend to another, coming to rest on Fred this time. Wesley paused for a moment, the door to his room half open. "I'm sorry," he whispered, glancing at Fred and then at Angel before he slid into his hotel-room and closed the door.

[taco_belle_fred]

Fred took a moment to breathe. Being around Wesley made her feel as if she had a heavy weight resting on her chest. It was because of how their relationship had evolved - because of how she had treated him after he’d nearly been killed by Justine.

There were other things to focus on, though, and as much as she wanted to pour all of her efforts into patching things up with her friend it was necessary to look at the big picture.

“Faith?” She looked up at Angel, worry in her eyes. Everyone knew Faith and to have her on Willow’s side meant only bad things for the others.

[hunk_nightthing]

Angel removed his stare from the door that had been slammed in his face. Was that it then? Figuratively. Literally. One door shut, another opened. Maybe it was time to leave Wes to his self-destructive depression, and to move on. At least he had the consolation of knowing that he'd tried.

Cold comfort.

"If it's true then Faith has chosen her path," Angel murmured, adopting a gentle tone for Winifred's benefit. The girl looked like she needed a solid shoulder to lean on. Maybe even to cry on. Angel couldn't do much to comfort Wesley, and Cordelia was gone. Maybe forever. With Charles and Lorne back in LA... It was just the two of them.

Angel had to look to Fred's safety above all else.

"Tell you what," he said, mustering a smile. "Once the sun sets, we'll go find out where Buffy and the others are holed up. Alright?" He glanced around the hallway, wishing for a bench. Maybe if there was a manager was around they could check into a room till the sun set. (Two separate beds, of course.)