Twist, crash, bang!
Yesterday I left work to go to Pilates. There was a slightly odd looking chap heading into the class ahead of me, turns out the normal instructor was on holiday and that he was covering. Apparently he used to teach at my gym until about 6 years ago, when he was ousted by “some Russian bitch”. Hmmm, professional.
He then went on to teach a yoga class, which confused us all massively as we were expecting pilates. Similar, yet different. Pilates does not include nonsense about how certain moves are massaging your internal organs and how head-stands improve your eyesight. I refused to even try doing a head-stand, on the grounds that my balance is shoddy. At this point he looked at me and said “You’re really not into this, are you?” You think?! Then there was the point where he decided to make those of us who couldn’t get our legs wrapped round themselves twice do so, not bothering to check why we might not be able to do it. Clue - if your knees click out of place a lot it tends not to be such a good idea to make them do unnatural things… At the end of the class he urged us to write in if we would like him reinstated. No chance!
I went home, and attempted to cook. Knocked the turmeric out of the cupboard and all over everything, including some of me (the kitchen surface is still yellow from that one). When trying to remove the yellow from the hob and surface with the aid of kitchen bleach stuff a bit later I think some water must have got in to where the sparky-thing for the gas is. It started smoking. At which point I went all girly and summoned the male housemate to look at it. We were both looking at it smoking when it went "bang!".
Frankly, this sums up how things have been going lately. I’m astounded I still got out of bed this morning.
He then went on to teach a yoga class, which confused us all massively as we were expecting pilates. Similar, yet different. Pilates does not include nonsense about how certain moves are massaging your internal organs and how head-stands improve your eyesight. I refused to even try doing a head-stand, on the grounds that my balance is shoddy. At this point he looked at me and said “You’re really not into this, are you?” You think?! Then there was the point where he decided to make those of us who couldn’t get our legs wrapped round themselves twice do so, not bothering to check why we might not be able to do it. Clue - if your knees click out of place a lot it tends not to be such a good idea to make them do unnatural things… At the end of the class he urged us to write in if we would like him reinstated. No chance!
I went home, and attempted to cook. Knocked the turmeric out of the cupboard and all over everything, including some of me (the kitchen surface is still yellow from that one). When trying to remove the yellow from the hob and surface with the aid of kitchen bleach stuff a bit later I think some water must have got in to where the sparky-thing for the gas is. It started smoking. At which point I went all girly and summoned the male housemate to look at it. We were both looking at it smoking when it went "bang!".
Frankly, this sums up how things have been going lately. I’m astounded I still got out of bed this morning.