To the British people:
Just watched Bender's Big Score - an extended Futurama episode which contains an uncannily accurate plot line: In the future, "Scammers" manage to steal everyone's money, first throwing the Earth into a Depression before finally managing to scam even the politicians charged with sorting the problem out and repossessing the entire planet, throwing everyone out and renaming the place "New Scamadonia".
Of course this being the movies, the Earthlings fight back, led first by Zap Brannigan, then Captain Leela. Bender's Big Score was made just before the big financial crisis hit. As I said, the similarity is uncanny, with one glaring exception - eventually, the people fight back and take the Earth back from the evil Scammers. And it inspired me to pen this rant, because even as we face a Depression people are blaming each other, in fact they are blaming the most pathetic victims of the crisis - so they are still being conned. It's as if halfway through the movie they decide to turn on poor old Zoidberg and curb-stomp him instead.
Is there anything you shitmunchers WON'T buy?
Maybe I should have been a con-man, politician or a bankster. 'Cos looking at the internet and the news, it seems you're all fucking morons who will buy any bucket of shit with a hole in it that the government and its propagandists want to sell you.
* Right wing "new" Labour - morons bought it.
* War in Iraq - morons bought it.
* Hassling immigrants and gypsies - morons bought it.
and the big one:
* Beating the living shit out of poor people while handing BILLIONS to the super-rich... MORONS BOUGHT IT lock, stock and barrel. Seems they don't mind being impoverished as long as some poor family gets made homeless. If nothing else this proves my thesis that BRITISH PEOPLE ARE CUNTS.
And whenever anyone came along to offer you an alternative - like the old school Lib Dems under Charles Kennedy or (further back) Kinnock and Smith's Old Labour - well, you didn't like that, did you? Occupy protesters want to blame "capitalism", conspiracies and the banking lizards, but it seems they're just taking advantage. You lot really seem to go around with your trousers down and the words FUCK ME tattooed on your buttocks.
Why don't you just wire Cameron all your money directly and cut out the middle man! You fucking, stupid, evil MORONS!
Of course this being the movies, the Earthlings fight back, led first by Zap Brannigan, then Captain Leela. Bender's Big Score was made just before the big financial crisis hit. As I said, the similarity is uncanny, with one glaring exception - eventually, the people fight back and take the Earth back from the evil Scammers. And it inspired me to pen this rant, because even as we face a Depression people are blaming each other, in fact they are blaming the most pathetic victims of the crisis - so they are still being conned. It's as if halfway through the movie they decide to turn on poor old Zoidberg and curb-stomp him instead.
Is there anything you shitmunchers WON'T buy?
Maybe I should have been a con-man, politician or a bankster. 'Cos looking at the internet and the news, it seems you're all fucking morons who will buy any bucket of shit with a hole in it that the government and its propagandists want to sell you.
* Right wing "new" Labour - morons bought it.
* War in Iraq - morons bought it.
* Hassling immigrants and gypsies - morons bought it.
and the big one:
* Beating the living shit out of poor people while handing BILLIONS to the super-rich... MORONS BOUGHT IT lock, stock and barrel. Seems they don't mind being impoverished as long as some poor family gets made homeless. If nothing else this proves my thesis that BRITISH PEOPLE ARE CUNTS.
And whenever anyone came along to offer you an alternative - like the old school Lib Dems under Charles Kennedy or (further back) Kinnock and Smith's Old Labour - well, you didn't like that, did you? Occupy protesters want to blame "capitalism", conspiracies and the banking lizards, but it seems they're just taking advantage. You lot really seem to go around with your trousers down and the words FUCK ME tattooed on your buttocks.
Why don't you just wire Cameron all your money directly and cut out the middle man! You fucking, stupid, evil MORONS!