Rantings from the midst of a Brenda Dickson video
Well hellllllllllllo!
Some of us have one of those Vegas experiences where we tell you little, tell you even less, or tell you absolutely nothing ("Whatever happens in Vegas..")..
Then there's me. I have been put upon this multicolored Earth to tell you too much. Everything from the Strip to the organ recitals to the canyons to seeing slot machines in the airport..
Welcome to Las Vegas.
THURSDAY:
I leave work 30 mins late again due to some unforseen last-minute crisis, making me fear that I'll miss my connections to Dulles; this after working 12-hour days the 3 days prior. Of course I didn't miss anything, including my flight, otherwise I probably would not be sharing my Vegas story to tell you (whatever happens in Dulles..).
I will tell you about the worst flight any single freak would endure: an overcrowded downsized plane with food-for-pay, bad movies-for-pay, being surrounded by, no lie, 15, yes, 15 screaming children whose parents were all going to a Mormon wedding in Utah.
It was the longest, most horrid, most noisy, most annoying (if that one little brat wouldn't stop dumping her doll on me I was going to IMMOLATE IT!!!!) flight from DC to Salt Lake City any human could endure.
Now I will, however, share in how incredibly gorgeous the mountain scenery around Salt Lake City was, since I had a very long layover in Utah, 2.5 hours worth, I had time to get out of the plane, even the airport, to take a few pics of the snow-capped summer mountain scenery, which was utterly breathtaking. Oh yeah and I saw that temple in the distance.. first time ever in Utah and what a view..
So then I board my next plane from Salt Lake City to Las Vegas, and it was short and child-free (you normally don't bring children to Vegas, conceive children is another story...)..
Chris is at the airport to pick me up and off we go.. down the Strip for me to experience a whirlwind Vegas.. my first time in this wild, strange, imitation city was a serious case of sensory overload.. we breezed up and down the Strip for me to see the old places like the Flamingo (the one the mob built), the Golden Nugget, and the Sahara, and the newer ones like the Venetian, the Bellagio, Paris, Luxor, Excalibur and New York New York.. We also stopped quickly at his house for a bit before time to check into my hotel (Main Street Station, on the north end of the Strip) (oh and BTW Chris lives in one of the wealthiest parts of Las Vegas, where multi-billionaire Steve Wynn is building his empire, etc.).. so then off to my hotel to check me in, put my stuff away and experience being 3 hours ahead of the rest of the populat...zzzzzzzzzzz...
FRIDAY:
What am I doing getting up before noon? Oh wait, it is the afternoon.. back home.. Chris picks me up after we had this lead weight of a great buffet brunch at the Original Pancake House (tooooo muuuuuuch foooooooood for very little price), meet one really cool freaky waitress Michelle and then go off to Trader Joe's to satisfy my newly-found obsession with pomegranate anything (mmmm Trader Joe's pomegranate soda = THE YUM!!!), hit Target for water (remember: you are in the desert), and proceeds to give me the day tour of his neighborhood, where the rich and the not-so-fabulous live (but I actually do want to meet his Lambourghini-driving lesbian neighbor with the huge animal statues everywhere!), the narcissistic photo shoot, and then that evening it's the Fremont Street Experience, one of the oldest sections of Las Vegas with one of the most spectacular light shows I've ever seen (considering that they've roofed all of Fremont Street to become Fremont Street Experience), being joined later by my friend Tom from Phoenix..
SATURDAY:
Chris picks me up and off we go to Paris.. I should leave it there and let you wonder for a while.. so in Paris we have crepes; I had fruits de mer seafood crepe with shrimp, scallops, mushrooms and béchamel..
Chris decides for me that I should see some of the better hotels in Vegas; listen to him, everyone! He took me first to the Venetian, one of the most beautiful hotels I've ever seen in my life! A hotel with its own Piazza San Marco, its own Grand Canal, its own fleet of gondolas (complete with singing gondoliers), and the occasional $15,000 artwork on sale at the nearest gallery just for you (Vegas, Baby!); that was utterly spectacular.. we also walked around the too-expensive-for-DC shops at the Palazzo, then took more pics near the front of the Venetian where this breathtaking ceiling fresco awaits you..
Afterward we go down the street to Caesar's Palace, one of the largest hotel/casinos in Vegas, complete with giant Roman statues, giant Roman fountains, and FAO Schwarz with a giant plush spider (MINE!!! Provided I had a few hundred dollars *sigh*), and this animatronic show about the Fall of Atlantis featuring fire, water, a dragon, and too many annoying tourons..
We also found time to stop by the International Food Market, where they have quantities of food from around the world except Scandinavia.. Any store w/o pepparkakor or knäckebröd or princesstårta has no right to call itself "international". I bought a Japanese exfoliating bath towel.. anyway..
So anyway, we are still full from the gigantic brunch at my hotel so we just piddle about around the city as Chris buys ingredients for his curry sensation on Sunday.. We then drove around for a night tour of some of the more fun-filled elements that you'll see on Cops on occasions.. of course, we didn't get out of the car..
SUNDAY:
I get up in time for Chris to pick me up again from the hotel and we go off to the cathedral (that looks like an IHOP) to hear Walt's really awesome organ recital.. beautiful music, fantastic talent, really bad flashbacks to my organ recitals as a 9-year old child whose organ teacher never showed up to a single one of them.. but what a rendition of Ave Maria and Vidor's Toccata..
Chris drops me off back at the hotel for me to change from ele-goth to phil-like-goth for the rest of the day as we go back as his friend Brian comes over to help make this wondiferous chicken curry with mango chutney, cranberry/apple chutney, rice and cranberry/blueberry bread.. and the Wonder that are Brenda Dickson videos!!!!!! Brenda (or parodying Brenda) is the most awesome experience anyone could imagine.. well, almost the most awesome experience anyone could imagine, but that's for another time..
Sunday night was one of the most awesome experiences I've had in Las Vegas. Chris, Brian and I go to the Bellagio. Inside you see a hodgepodge of French, Italian and American all over the place, model trains, controlled water displays and giant eaglet animatronics.. then outside we rush out because toward the end of the evening the Bellagio puts out the most spectacular fountain water shows I've ever seen in my life! Indeed it was just plain amazing, all set to music piped outdoors for hundreds to see (like fireworks only with water).. just plain phenomenal!
MONDAY:
I managed to finally do what is the tradition in Vegas: I spent $7 on slot machines (and won $6 back!!)
My last day in Las Vegas and Chris saves the absolute best for last: I didn't think anything could top the Venetian, the fountains at the Bellagio or his chicken curry, but alas he topped it all by driving only an hour away, to Red Rock Canyon, one of the most beautiful natural sites I've ever seen in my life!!!
We spent the afternoon in 100-degree+ (F, or for you Euros, +45C), taking pics after pics after glorious pics of truly one of the most impressive sites created by an Uncaused Cause next to Norway.. I got to see Joshua trees in the wild for the first time in my life, drove around where wild burros, scorpions, roadrunners and breathtaking creations of sandstone and limestone all hang out and party.. the Wow..
After that we drive back into the city in time for me to take a quick trip up the Stratosphere to view Vegas from the rooftops, nearly 1000 feet up.. nearly lost one of my hats (how's that for irony?), took lots of pics.. then Chris, before he takes me back to the airport, insists that I try one of the most beloved traditions in the American West: In-And-Out Burger (Yeah Brad, you were right, OK????).. and that was tragically it for me.
I flew back that night to Detroit on a flight surrounded by old people, but they weren't screaming so I was OK with that..
TUESDAY:
Detroit.. The Major YUCK! I used to work there and I will never intentionally visit that place ever again! The 2 hour layover was uncomfortable and annoying, and didn't make my subsequent return to DC that pleasant considering that I am here at Kinko's, haven't been home yet and.. oh whatever, VEGAS ROCKS!!!!!
Now for more pomegranates and crepes.. :)
Some of us have one of those Vegas experiences where we tell you little, tell you even less, or tell you absolutely nothing ("Whatever happens in Vegas..")..
Then there's me. I have been put upon this multicolored Earth to tell you too much. Everything from the Strip to the organ recitals to the canyons to seeing slot machines in the airport..
Welcome to Las Vegas.
THURSDAY:
I leave work 30 mins late again due to some unforseen last-minute crisis, making me fear that I'll miss my connections to Dulles; this after working 12-hour days the 3 days prior. Of course I didn't miss anything, including my flight, otherwise I probably would not be sharing my Vegas story to tell you (whatever happens in Dulles..).
I will tell you about the worst flight any single freak would endure: an overcrowded downsized plane with food-for-pay, bad movies-for-pay, being surrounded by, no lie, 15, yes, 15 screaming children whose parents were all going to a Mormon wedding in Utah.
It was the longest, most horrid, most noisy, most annoying (if that one little brat wouldn't stop dumping her doll on me I was going to IMMOLATE IT!!!!) flight from DC to Salt Lake City any human could endure.
Now I will, however, share in how incredibly gorgeous the mountain scenery around Salt Lake City was, since I had a very long layover in Utah, 2.5 hours worth, I had time to get out of the plane, even the airport, to take a few pics of the snow-capped summer mountain scenery, which was utterly breathtaking. Oh yeah and I saw that temple in the distance.. first time ever in Utah and what a view..
So then I board my next plane from Salt Lake City to Las Vegas, and it was short and child-free (you normally don't bring children to Vegas, conceive children is another story...)..
Chris is at the airport to pick me up and off we go.. down the Strip for me to experience a whirlwind Vegas.. my first time in this wild, strange, imitation city was a serious case of sensory overload.. we breezed up and down the Strip for me to see the old places like the Flamingo (the one the mob built), the Golden Nugget, and the Sahara, and the newer ones like the Venetian, the Bellagio, Paris, Luxor, Excalibur and New York New York.. We also stopped quickly at his house for a bit before time to check into my hotel (Main Street Station, on the north end of the Strip) (oh and BTW Chris lives in one of the wealthiest parts of Las Vegas, where multi-billionaire Steve Wynn is building his empire, etc.).. so then off to my hotel to check me in, put my stuff away and experience being 3 hours ahead of the rest of the populat...zzzzzzzzzzz...
FRIDAY:
What am I doing getting up before noon? Oh wait, it is the afternoon.. back home.. Chris picks me up after we had this lead weight of a great buffet brunch at the Original Pancake House (tooooo muuuuuuch foooooooood for very little price), meet one really cool freaky waitress Michelle and then go off to Trader Joe's to satisfy my newly-found obsession with pomegranate anything (mmmm Trader Joe's pomegranate soda = THE YUM!!!), hit Target for water (remember: you are in the desert), and proceeds to give me the day tour of his neighborhood, where the rich and the not-so-fabulous live (but I actually do want to meet his Lambourghini-driving lesbian neighbor with the huge animal statues everywhere!), the narcissistic photo shoot, and then that evening it's the Fremont Street Experience, one of the oldest sections of Las Vegas with one of the most spectacular light shows I've ever seen (considering that they've roofed all of Fremont Street to become Fremont Street Experience), being joined later by my friend Tom from Phoenix..
SATURDAY:
Chris picks me up and off we go to Paris.. I should leave it there and let you wonder for a while.. so in Paris we have crepes; I had fruits de mer seafood crepe with shrimp, scallops, mushrooms and béchamel..
Chris decides for me that I should see some of the better hotels in Vegas; listen to him, everyone! He took me first to the Venetian, one of the most beautiful hotels I've ever seen in my life! A hotel with its own Piazza San Marco, its own Grand Canal, its own fleet of gondolas (complete with singing gondoliers), and the occasional $15,000 artwork on sale at the nearest gallery just for you (Vegas, Baby!); that was utterly spectacular.. we also walked around the too-expensive-for-DC shops at the Palazzo, then took more pics near the front of the Venetian where this breathtaking ceiling fresco awaits you..
Afterward we go down the street to Caesar's Palace, one of the largest hotel/casinos in Vegas, complete with giant Roman statues, giant Roman fountains, and FAO Schwarz with a giant plush spider (MINE!!! Provided I had a few hundred dollars *sigh*), and this animatronic show about the Fall of Atlantis featuring fire, water, a dragon, and too many annoying tourons..
We also found time to stop by the International Food Market, where they have quantities of food from around the world except Scandinavia.. Any store w/o pepparkakor or knäckebröd or princesstårta has no right to call itself "international". I bought a Japanese exfoliating bath towel.. anyway..
So anyway, we are still full from the gigantic brunch at my hotel so we just piddle about around the city as Chris buys ingredients for his curry sensation on Sunday.. We then drove around for a night tour of some of the more fun-filled elements that you'll see on Cops on occasions.. of course, we didn't get out of the car..
SUNDAY:
I get up in time for Chris to pick me up again from the hotel and we go off to the cathedral (that looks like an IHOP) to hear Walt's really awesome organ recital.. beautiful music, fantastic talent, really bad flashbacks to my organ recitals as a 9-year old child whose organ teacher never showed up to a single one of them.. but what a rendition of Ave Maria and Vidor's Toccata..
Chris drops me off back at the hotel for me to change from ele-goth to phil-like-goth for the rest of the day as we go back as his friend Brian comes over to help make this wondiferous chicken curry with mango chutney, cranberry/apple chutney, rice and cranberry/blueberry bread.. and the Wonder that are Brenda Dickson videos!!!!!! Brenda (or parodying Brenda) is the most awesome experience anyone could imagine.. well, almost the most awesome experience anyone could imagine, but that's for another time..
Sunday night was one of the most awesome experiences I've had in Las Vegas. Chris, Brian and I go to the Bellagio. Inside you see a hodgepodge of French, Italian and American all over the place, model trains, controlled water displays and giant eaglet animatronics.. then outside we rush out because toward the end of the evening the Bellagio puts out the most spectacular fountain water shows I've ever seen in my life! Indeed it was just plain amazing, all set to music piped outdoors for hundreds to see (like fireworks only with water).. just plain phenomenal!
MONDAY:
I managed to finally do what is the tradition in Vegas: I spent $7 on slot machines (and won $6 back!!)
My last day in Las Vegas and Chris saves the absolute best for last: I didn't think anything could top the Venetian, the fountains at the Bellagio or his chicken curry, but alas he topped it all by driving only an hour away, to Red Rock Canyon, one of the most beautiful natural sites I've ever seen in my life!!!
We spent the afternoon in 100-degree+ (F, or for you Euros, +45C), taking pics after pics after glorious pics of truly one of the most impressive sites created by an Uncaused Cause next to Norway.. I got to see Joshua trees in the wild for the first time in my life, drove around where wild burros, scorpions, roadrunners and breathtaking creations of sandstone and limestone all hang out and party.. the Wow..
After that we drive back into the city in time for me to take a quick trip up the Stratosphere to view Vegas from the rooftops, nearly 1000 feet up.. nearly lost one of my hats (how's that for irony?), took lots of pics.. then Chris, before he takes me back to the airport, insists that I try one of the most beloved traditions in the American West: In-And-Out Burger (Yeah Brad, you were right, OK????).. and that was tragically it for me.
I flew back that night to Detroit on a flight surrounded by old people, but they weren't screaming so I was OK with that..
TUESDAY:
Detroit.. The Major YUCK! I used to work there and I will never intentionally visit that place ever again! The 2 hour layover was uncomfortable and annoying, and didn't make my subsequent return to DC that pleasant considering that I am here at Kinko's, haven't been home yet and.. oh whatever, VEGAS ROCKS!!!!!
Now for more pomegranates and crepes.. :)