(no subject)
I have a dilemma.
See...on Wednesday I am supposed to leave for a free trip to Whistler with my family. I've been looking forward to it for months and I'm very excited about seeing mountains and ocean again.
But at the same time right now I have shitloads of schoolwork, a filthy room (yes, Carol, it actually is filthy, I'm not exaggerating...something smells...), and a whole pile of stress. And this trip to Whistler isn't helping, because it's putting alot of pressure on me to get a lot of work done in the next few days, and when I return I will still be behind...and stressed.
As you know, I have depression and stress ain't good. I'm afraid that this trip to Whistler will be more of a stress-inducer than a stress-relief. So I'm debating about not going. I really don't want to set myself on a path that will take me to those bad mental spaces.
If I don't go. I would have an empty house and 5 full days of time to get a lot of work done, clean my room and my bathroom, catch-up with friends, and maybe, just maybe relax. I could really go for some good mental downtime. Which will be next to nil if I go to Whistler.
But at the same time...MOUNTAINS!!! mountains mountains mountains mountains mountains....
But I will be seeing lots of mountains in a few months wih Anthony...can I wait...should I wait...I don't know.
Really, I feel like I need a BREAK right now...just some time to have a bath, listen to music and catch up on all the things I need to do...
So it's a dilemma...free trip to mountains and stress (which will likely lead to a big bout of depression in March) or no mountains but lots of TIME.
I don't know what to do.....
See...on Wednesday I am supposed to leave for a free trip to Whistler with my family. I've been looking forward to it for months and I'm very excited about seeing mountains and ocean again.
But at the same time right now I have shitloads of schoolwork, a filthy room (yes, Carol, it actually is filthy, I'm not exaggerating...something smells...), and a whole pile of stress. And this trip to Whistler isn't helping, because it's putting alot of pressure on me to get a lot of work done in the next few days, and when I return I will still be behind...and stressed.
As you know, I have depression and stress ain't good. I'm afraid that this trip to Whistler will be more of a stress-inducer than a stress-relief. So I'm debating about not going. I really don't want to set myself on a path that will take me to those bad mental spaces.
If I don't go. I would have an empty house and 5 full days of time to get a lot of work done, clean my room and my bathroom, catch-up with friends, and maybe, just maybe relax. I could really go for some good mental downtime. Which will be next to nil if I go to Whistler.
But at the same time...MOUNTAINS!!! mountains mountains mountains mountains mountains....
But I will be seeing lots of mountains in a few months wih Anthony...can I wait...should I wait...I don't know.
Really, I feel like I need a BREAK right now...just some time to have a bath, listen to music and catch up on all the things I need to do...
So it's a dilemma...free trip to mountains and stress (which will likely lead to a big bout of depression in March) or no mountains but lots of TIME.
I don't know what to do.....