Wraaating
I managed to fit in some writing today during my breaks at work. I always mean to do this but usually end up reading. I've just finished something really good, though, and didn't feel like starting anything new just yet so I picked up my notebook and got scribbling. Typed it up just now and I had written 1.1k, which is the most I've written in one day in a looong time (couple of months probably). Go me! So that brings me to the end of chapter 2 of my little Buffy-centric Thing and maybe... a quarter done? (And I have to laugh at myself when I'm projecting 25k and calling it 'little' - how times have changed).
Anyway, here's another snippet from recent efforts. After this I'm going to try to restrain myself because I don't want to a) spam and b) spoil. Not that I'm sure if anyone will read a probably-Spike-less not-exactly-spuffy fic. But at least I'm enjoying myself :)
She can’t leave without speaking to Dawn, though. Buffy’s been putting it off since she arrived and doesn’t feel any less reluctant to deal with things now, but despite the calm sense of purpose that’s settled over her ever since she made the decision to go, she’s not stupid enough to think there’s no danger.
There’s a long load of nothing on the other end of the phone line when she tries to explain what’s what.
“Dawn?” she tries. “Dawnie? You still there?” Silence. “Look, are you gonna be okay by yourself while I’m gone? Cause I don’t know how long it’s going to be. You could always go stay with Marta for a while, I’m sure her mom wouldn’t mind.” Silence. It’s like when she was thirteen and thought the silent treatment was the ultimate in sibling punishment. Buffy sighs, picturing her sister’s angry face all too easily, the powerlessness that underlies it. If she were a better sister, she wouldn’t go. She’d fly back to Rome and smooth things over and give Dawn the stability she craves. She knows that’s what she should do, but she can’t make the decision take hold within her. Anyway, it’s not like Dawn’s a baby anymore - she’s eighteen now, definitely old enough to take care of herself for a couple of weeks. God, with Buffy and her pesky boyfriend out of her hair she’ll probably have more fun than she’s had all year. It’s what Buffy would have done if she was a normal eighteen year old at home by herself. And it’s not like Buffy being there before made everything so great for her. “Well, I’ve got to go pack, so-”
“Wait!”
Buffy pauses. “Dawn?”
“Wait, Buffy, just… don’t go without…”
She sounds weird, like the words are being torn out of her; like she’s scared. It’s so utterly not what Buffy expected that she feels herself soften like butter. “It’ll be fine,” she soothes, “it’s no big, just a couple of warlocks getting too friendly with the dark magicks. I’ll be back before you know it.”
“Yeah, because powerful warlocks getting hopped up on dark mojo has always been so easy to deal with in the past.” Beneath the sarcasm, which is pretty feeble by Dawn’s high standards, her voice is small enough that she really could be thirteen again, that sweet-faced little girl who’d already seen way too much of the world’s ugliness.
“Right,” Buffy says. “Easy peasy.”
“I’m sorry,” Dawn blurts. “About before, with the Imm- uh, with Giancarlo. I was a complete bitch and I didn’t mean… you know…” Down the phone line it sounds as though she’s taking a steadying breath. “I love you. You know that, right?”
“I know, sweetheart. Love you too.”
“I just… I didn’t want you to leave still thinking that I… that I didn’t.”
Ah, so that’s what this is about. She wonders vaguely why the ache is absent, why she can’t feel even an echo of sympathy for her little sister.
“I’ll always know that,” Buffy says, trying to be reassuring, trying to be all of the things she should be but isn’t.
*
In other news, the hubby and I have been watching House of Cards recently - an epi with dinner most nights. Tonight we started Season 2 and by the end I was legitimately terrified of Frank Underwood. Didn't really see that reaction coming! Basically my progression has gone something like: rooting for the amoral Machiavelli because he's cleverer than all the rest and deserves to win --> rooting for the amoral Machiavelli's downfall because he not only crossed the line but left it on the far horizon --> hiding under the blanket from the amoral M's all-seeing eye-of-Sauron eyes because he hasn't forgotten about me SHIT HE HASN'T FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME RUN RUN RUN FOR HILLS
If you're not watching, you should. So I can shriek with you. Also because the writing is pretty good and the acting is even better. But mostly for the shriekage D:
Anyway, here's another snippet from recent efforts. After this I'm going to try to restrain myself because I don't want to a) spam and b) spoil. Not that I'm sure if anyone will read a probably-Spike-less not-exactly-spuffy fic. But at least I'm enjoying myself :)
She can’t leave without speaking to Dawn, though. Buffy’s been putting it off since she arrived and doesn’t feel any less reluctant to deal with things now, but despite the calm sense of purpose that’s settled over her ever since she made the decision to go, she’s not stupid enough to think there’s no danger.
There’s a long load of nothing on the other end of the phone line when she tries to explain what’s what.
“Dawn?” she tries. “Dawnie? You still there?” Silence. “Look, are you gonna be okay by yourself while I’m gone? Cause I don’t know how long it’s going to be. You could always go stay with Marta for a while, I’m sure her mom wouldn’t mind.” Silence. It’s like when she was thirteen and thought the silent treatment was the ultimate in sibling punishment. Buffy sighs, picturing her sister’s angry face all too easily, the powerlessness that underlies it. If she were a better sister, she wouldn’t go. She’d fly back to Rome and smooth things over and give Dawn the stability she craves. She knows that’s what she should do, but she can’t make the decision take hold within her. Anyway, it’s not like Dawn’s a baby anymore - she’s eighteen now, definitely old enough to take care of herself for a couple of weeks. God, with Buffy and her pesky boyfriend out of her hair she’ll probably have more fun than she’s had all year. It’s what Buffy would have done if she was a normal eighteen year old at home by herself. And it’s not like Buffy being there before made everything so great for her. “Well, I’ve got to go pack, so-”
“Wait!”
Buffy pauses. “Dawn?”
“Wait, Buffy, just… don’t go without…”
She sounds weird, like the words are being torn out of her; like she’s scared. It’s so utterly not what Buffy expected that she feels herself soften like butter. “It’ll be fine,” she soothes, “it’s no big, just a couple of warlocks getting too friendly with the dark magicks. I’ll be back before you know it.”
“Yeah, because powerful warlocks getting hopped up on dark mojo has always been so easy to deal with in the past.” Beneath the sarcasm, which is pretty feeble by Dawn’s high standards, her voice is small enough that she really could be thirteen again, that sweet-faced little girl who’d already seen way too much of the world’s ugliness.
“Right,” Buffy says. “Easy peasy.”
“I’m sorry,” Dawn blurts. “About before, with the Imm- uh, with Giancarlo. I was a complete bitch and I didn’t mean… you know…” Down the phone line it sounds as though she’s taking a steadying breath. “I love you. You know that, right?”
“I know, sweetheart. Love you too.”
“I just… I didn’t want you to leave still thinking that I… that I didn’t.”
Ah, so that’s what this is about. She wonders vaguely why the ache is absent, why she can’t feel even an echo of sympathy for her little sister.
“I’ll always know that,” Buffy says, trying to be reassuring, trying to be all of the things she should be but isn’t.
*
In other news, the hubby and I have been watching House of Cards recently - an epi with dinner most nights. Tonight we started Season 2 and by the end I was legitimately terrified of Frank Underwood. Didn't really see that reaction coming! Basically my progression has gone something like: rooting for the amoral Machiavelli because he's cleverer than all the rest and deserves to win --> rooting for the amoral Machiavelli's downfall because he not only crossed the line but left it on the far horizon --> hiding under the blanket from the amoral M's all-seeing eye-of-Sauron eyes because he hasn't forgotten about me SHIT HE HASN'T FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME RUN RUN RUN FOR HILLS
If you're not watching, you should. So I can shriek with you. Also because the writing is pretty good and the acting is even better. But mostly for the shriekage D: