RP: Poker Night

[damien_j]

Date: December 2, 2011
Characters: Soledad Navarro, Damien Jackson, Jasper Woods, Ezra Loy, Miranda Jackson, Ariel Crabtree, Gigi Campbell
Location: Damien and Soli's apartment
Status: Private
Summary: Just a way to get some friends together and relax.
Completion: Complete

Comments

[ezra_loy]

"It would. I mean the way I see it, if I continue to hold your hand you'll be forced to keep my company all night, and I kind of enjoy your company." Ezra answered with a grin. He wasn't going to look closer at it than that, or at least he wasn't going to elaborate, especially not when he was still trying to figure things out in his own head.

He laughed. "Have to say I didn't realize that, no. I would imagine it's not like I'd really notice, you are after all tiny." Ezra's reply was honest. That thought hadn't exactly crossed his mind, though now that Ariel had brought it up, he couldn't exactly get the image out of his thoughts. "Wouldn't be the first time I was used as a chair." There, that didn't give away what he actually thought about it her point, and it was the truth. It wouldn't be the first time, and it likely wouldn't be the last time either.

"Fate, right?" He was well aware of the whole 'it's fate' thing. A lot of people brought it up to him after his accident, trying to ease his otherwise dismal thoughts. A couple people had even said it was God's plan, though Ezra had never been particularly religious, he could respect other viewpoints.

[ariel_crabtree]

"Well, for that all you have to do is ask," she told him honestly, squeezing his hand slightly. Ezra was a good friend, she thought. Different than what she had with Harley and Thad, to be certain, but good. It was nice to finally have a couple of people she could rely on in her life.

"Mm, I'm sure I could still make your leg fall asleep," she mused quietly. She was tiny, but approximately a hundred pounds, give or take ten at any given time, was still a hefty enough amount. "I'm sure it's not, but I'm also sure it's probably your nieces usually, and they're all still smaller than me, I think." Though she hadn't really met them yet, so she couldn't say for sure. She didn't mention that it had also been his boyfriend--if she remembered it right, the first time she'd met him, Kyle had been in his lap.

"Fate, God," she said with a slight shrug. "But it is something of a sign, I think, when you keep running into the same person all the time. Makes you think a little, at least. There's only so much coincidence in this world."

[ezra_loy]

"Where's the fun in that?" He asked with a smirk, although he stopped himself before he said something about how asking would eliminate the possibility of holding her hand like this, 'cause yeah, he could stick his foot in his mouth, but even he knew saying that would make things awkward.

"I don't doubt that." He agreed, aware that although she was tiny, she would still have the ability to do that. "It usually is my nieces, yes. And Kyle used to do it, also." Ezra had to figure they were both thinking about that fact, since he could remember the first time he'd met Ariel and the fact that Kyle had pretty much been glued to him that night, no point it acting like he didn't have a past. "So guess you could say I'm used to it. You're bigger than my nieces, but smaller than him." And he had to wonder if it was awkward to talk about his ex with Ariel, though probably not as she wasn't aware of how he felt about her, or how he thought he might feel about her.

"Right, God." he said with a nod. "So you believe in a higher power, then?" It wasn't a judgmental question really, just curious. "Yeah? Probably is, and anyway Miranda's a fairly nice girl, so I don't mind running into her. "True, so someone has to have a hand in things, right?"

[ariel_crabtree]

"Mm, you have a point, I suppose," Ariel mused, nodding. She supposed it woudl rather steal the fun out of the process, though it was true, all he had to do was ask anytime.

Ariel nodded. "Thought I remembered that," she said, lifting a shoulder. Kyle had been bigger than her, it was true. She hadn't much been near him, though, so she didn't know much about him in general. She hadn't been around him but the one time. "Used to it is good, I suppose. I'm used to being put in a lap, so it equals out, then, doesn't it?" she said, not bothered by the mention of his ex.

"I grew up in church," she replied with a slight shrug. "So yeah, God and all that. Jesus, heaven, hell." She glanced sidewise up at him, knowing it wasn't that common with some anymore, though it wasn't like she was devout or even judgmental. "Yup, that exactly."

[ezra_loy]

"Or I'm just complicating a simple thing like asking for your company." Ezra countered, grinning slightly. The teasing was fun, and liked holding onto her hand more than he thought he should, but maybe just simply asking her would be better over all.

Ezra shrugged a shoulder and nodded. "Good memory." He said, realizing that his ex had been fairly clingy, so it wasn't surprising that Ariel would remember that about their first meeting, as it hadn't been an uncommon thing. "Think it probably does, guess it's fate." he answered with a grin, and he was definitely thinking about this too much.

"Oh yeah?" He asked, though he wasn't particularly surprised. "Didn't spent a lot of time in churches growing up, you could say we're the 'we go on holidays' sort of family." And even that had been sporadic at best. "So you really think someone has your entire life mapped out?" Ezra's tone was curious, he really did wonder what Ariel's thoughts about that were.

[ariel_crabtree]

"Well, I don't mind either way." She enjoyed the banter they usually shared, though she knew that sometimes it bordered on silly. She had had precious little silliness in her life the last several years, and it seemed sometimes like she was making up for lost time, even though she'd be twenty-three soon.

"First time I met y'all. I remember faces," she said, shrugging slightly. It had been a fun night for her, and she had only had a couple of beers. She had no problems with couples sharing a lap, she'd done it a lot in her life, as she enjoyed the closeness, but she had specifically remembered because she wasn't used to being around gay couples. It had been weird though she hadn't minded it.

"I'm a bit like that these days," she admitted almost wistfully. "I only went on the holidays the last few years." And it made her sad. She really should be a better Christian. She shook her head. "No. God gave us freewill, but He is there to give us guidance. Or so I was taught. It's up to us to make the right decisions."

[ezra_loy]

Ezra knew he could be goofy and silly, but life was often times hard enough, why make it worse by being serious all the time. He enjoyed their banter, even if sometimes it was redundant and silly. "Well, I'll keep that in mind, then." And he was definitely not thinking about doing this more often, well, not only thinking about that.

"Is it strange to admit that feels like a lifetime ago?" He asked. Hadn't even been a year, and yet Ezra already felt like an entirely different person again, which was a common feeling he'd been having since the accident.

He just nodded, not uncomfortable talking about God, but definitely no used to it. "Guess you could say I missed that memo. I didn't really grow up identifying with any one religion." He wasn't even entirely sure if his parents were Christians or not. "The concept of someone you can't see giving you guidance just seems kind of odd to me...." Ezra kind of hoped he wasn't offending Ariel right now. "Not that it's bad or anything, that's just placing a lot of trust is someone you can't see, y'know?"

[ariel_crabtree]

"Not too strange really," Ariel said. "Seems like a long time ago I moved down here, and it's barely been a year, so." She shrugged. She felt lik ean almost completely different person, even though she knew deep down she was the same as she had been in many ways. Only she was better at taking care of himself, a bit. And maybe a little braver than before.

"Well, Ezra, that's why they call it faith," Ariel said simply, looking up at him with large, serious eyes. "I might not go very often, but there's still faith there." She pushed her hair back and smiled slightly. "Perhaps it's odd, but I guess to me if you don't have faith in anything, then you don't look for anything good." She'd always been told that she looked for the good too much. She rarely saw the bad in people until it was shoved up under her nose.

[ezra_loy]

Ezra nodded, relieved that Ariel understood what he was trying to say. It'd been over a year since his accident, and the subsequent change in his life. "Life before my injury seems like another person lived it." He definitely didn't feel like the person he'd been before his accident, and he knew he'd done a lot of changing in the time since. Was still changing actually, still figuring things out.

"Right, it's where the saying 'blind faith' came from, right?" Or at least that's what Ezra had always thought, since most people who believed in God did so without knowing if he truly existed. "Do you have to have religion to have faith, though?" He wasn't being judgmental at all, he was just curious about someone else's take on things.

[ariel_crabtree]

"Sometimes I feel like that. And sometimes I think I'm always gonna be that girl from back home," Ariel said softly, shoulders lifting and falling again. She tugged on her ponytail, resettling it slightly. Sometimes she really did think she'd always be that girl.

"Pretty much, I think," she said with a nod. She hmmmed in thought. "I dunnos. I don't think so, after all, atheists have faith in other people and things all the time, right? But I'd like to think there's some greater power, at least, out there. Someone to watch over us."

[ezra_loy]

"Honestly, I think we all have those moments. " His might not be about feeling like the person he used to be, though sometimes he often wished he could be that person again. As much as the Marines had merely been a way to rebel against his Father, at least when he'd been in the service he had felt like his life had direction. He missed the routine sometimes, but he couldn't dwell on what he no longer had.

"Easier to think that even if you don't know where your life is headed, that someone's up there watching out for you, right?" Ezra understood what Ariel was saying, even if he himself wasn't entirely sure where he stood on religion as a whole.

[ariel_crabtree]

"You think so?" Ariel replied, tilting her head curiously. It wasn't something she talked about with most people. On the whole she just tried to keep pushing on, though her mind still dwelt in the past possibly more than it should at times. She had gotten a lot better about it the last few months, but she still thought of home a lot, especially with the holidays coming up.

"Watching out, or at least there when you reach the point when you know you have to do something. When you don't have the strength to go on alone, He is the one who will help you through," she said rather softly, hand unconsciously going over the scar on her collarbone, remember one of those moments too vividly to discount still. Over a year ago, and still... the realization that she had to leave him despite loving him, or she would die had been one of the most awful ones of her life, and she had had a few in her life. "It can... be comforting," she said, smiling faintly up at him, trying to pull her mind back up from that particular memory.

[ezra_loy]

"Yeah, I do." Ezra answered, shrugging slightly. "I mean I always feel like I'm going to be the new kid." Even after a year in Fort Worth, he still managed to get that 'new kid' feeling about some things. Sure he felt more connected here as a whole, he couldn't deny having that feeling still every once and awhile.

"How do you know he's helping you, though?" It seemed like a logical question to Ezra, and he was realizing that there was a lot that went into having faith in God, or religion in general. If Ariel was right and this whole 'helping' concept was true, did that mean God had a hand in his accident or him surviving it? Nodding, he could see how it could be comforting in a way. "Knowing someone has your back? Yeah, that's always a comfort." It was one thing he missed about being out of the service; he no longer felt like he had a group of people who'd have his back no matter what.

[ariel_crabtree]

"Well, you're here now. Not the new kid anymore," she said softly, bumping her shoulder against his companionably. "Y'got friends here, seems like. Or we wouldn't be here, right?" she said, looking around the place a bit. She knew the feeling he mentioned, though it was only more familiar in the past year or so. She was the new kid around here.

Ariel bit her lip slightly. "It's in that moment when you think you can't take another step, and you do it anyway. Or you're having the worst day ever, and you see a pretty flower and smile. Or like, waking up and just knowing that this is what you have to do, even if it's not the easy thing anymore." She shrugged. She wasn't terribly good with words, but those were her experiences.

[ezra_loy]

"No I'm not. And that's the first time in my life that I haven't been." He said quietly, smiling slightly as she bumped her shoulder against his. Sure he had three years in the Marines where he hadn't been the new kid, but Ezra felt like that was an entirely different thing."Yeah, we wouldn't be here if they weren't." Though he wasn't certain he could call him and Damien friends just yet, but he could admit he was hoping they would be at some point.

Ezra listened intently to Ariel as she explained, thinking that was the best explanation of faith he'd heard in a long time. It made sense to him, he'd had those days where he'd woken up and felt like there wasn't much of a reason to get out of bed, and yet he'd always felt like something or someone was telling him he had to. "So really that voice you hear in the back of your mind is most likely God urging you on?" It was a curiosity question, this being the first time Ezra had really had a chance to talk with someone who seemed to have true faith in something.

[ariel_crabtree]

"Sort of?" Ariel said. "Dunno if it's that, exactly. Maybe the thing behind the voice in your head?" she suggested. "I mean, on TV you always see the angel and the demon on someone's shoulder, right? Those are talking to you, to the voice in your head, I sorta figure. I mean, I don't really know for sure. But even if I don't go to church much no more, I still do believe in God." When she was little, it was almost all she had sometimes, knowing that maybe someday God would bring her something better, if she tried real hard to be real good.