(no subject)
so i've really figured this out.
i've finally figured one dimension of me out, definitely for sure...and it's odd because it's relative to the least vivid part of me.
with me, you must have patience. lots and lots and lots.
..and then i still have to explain myself.
i'm not vague on purpose, i'm not. it's the way the wheels that produce my thoughts turn.
so for those that get impatient with how i present myself and my feelings..
think of how it is in my mind.
because i think a thought that makes no sense, then i have to analyze it..and that processes slowly..
and this is why i'm so good at analyzing. if i weren't in a constant state of analogy i wouldn't function, i couldn't think. i couldn't break myself down to words that i can speak.
so...seventeen years later [obvious i.e. of my ability to process] i realize.
i don't care how insignificant it seems...it doesn't matter. because now i've developed 1/348739184 of myself and figured it out. who can say that for themselves?
perhaps i will be a well rounded person one day thirty years down the line. it's better than only a glimpse of completion before death.
life goal #1.
i've finally figured one dimension of me out, definitely for sure...and it's odd because it's relative to the least vivid part of me.
with me, you must have patience. lots and lots and lots.
..and then i still have to explain myself.
i'm not vague on purpose, i'm not. it's the way the wheels that produce my thoughts turn.
so for those that get impatient with how i present myself and my feelings..
think of how it is in my mind.
because i think a thought that makes no sense, then i have to analyze it..and that processes slowly..
and this is why i'm so good at analyzing. if i weren't in a constant state of analogy i wouldn't function, i couldn't think. i couldn't break myself down to words that i can speak.
so...seventeen years later [obvious i.e. of my ability to process] i realize.
i don't care how insignificant it seems...it doesn't matter. because now i've developed 1/348739184 of myself and figured it out. who can say that for themselves?
perhaps i will be a well rounded person one day thirty years down the line. it's better than only a glimpse of completion before death.
life goal #1.