how is this any different, if you think it's a wake-up call to me, from anything i've done? i try to be brutally honest, to use tough love, because it works. and obviously you seem to think the same way.
would it be better if i went straight up instead of pussy footing around? fine. it hurts me to see my friends self destructing. to see them smoking, picking up drinking - yes i drink, but only socially - and becoming despondent. i have friends who could join the army, who weren't born with the disqualifiers i was born with, and who are throwing away their gifts through self destructive behavior.
and it pisses me off that you don't even see my perspective about this. how'd you feel the last time a dream you've nurtured since you were 6 was destroyed by something hereditary. i desperately wanted to join up, and now i can't. i dreamed of wearing "ARMY" on my chest. strange as it sounds, i wanted to die in that uniform, having it mean something. and now, to me, my life will be basically worthless. you know what that means? destined to walk the earth, a hollow shell who will never see himself as a man. so fuck off.
If you never want to hear from me again, then tell me to fuck off, go ahead, I will never speak to you again ... espicially since im just trying to understand whats going on, and am trying to help get this whole situation get resolved. But honestly if you hate me that much, go ahead and tell me to fuck off ... I will.
We arent self destructing Josh, I havent touched a cigarette since you left last time, im not kidding either. I just stopped one day, I tried it, I enjoyed it to an extent, but I didnt want it to become part of who i am. Josh we are trying to find ourselves right now, everybody is expiermenting with different things, trying to make themselves unique, trying to figure out who THEY are. No one just wakes up one day and knows who they are, we have to figure it out through trial and error. As for the drinking, lemme say this, you have no idea what our drinking habbits are, you wanna know something, I have only been drunk once in my life. I know how ot drink resposibely, and I think I deserve that credit.
And its not that I dont see your perspective Josh, its that I feel like its hard for me to feel bad for you when your upset, when you begin your entry by ripping on someone else who had something emotional happen to them. I realize it sucks to lose something you really wanted, and more so to loose it because of something you had no control over. Im not saying I understand how much it hurts you, if this was as an important a thing to you as you say, then I have never expierenced any loss of that magnitude, BUT I am saying I know the feeling of un-fair loss.
tough love can be good for accomplishing a lot of things Josh, but you have to realize that its still love, and you would never kick someone you love when they are already down.
ok, i didnt give you the credit you deserved on multiple counts. im being emo myself and hating it. so i'm being an ass. you're right. i'm damn good at it when i try.
would it be better if i went straight up instead of pussy footing around? fine. it hurts me to see my friends self destructing. to see them smoking, picking up drinking - yes i drink, but only socially - and becoming despondent. i have friends who could join the army, who weren't born with the disqualifiers i was born with, and who are throwing away their gifts through self destructive behavior.
and it pisses me off that you don't even see my perspective about this. how'd you feel the last time a dream you've nurtured since you were 6 was destroyed by something hereditary. i desperately wanted to join up, and now i can't. i dreamed of wearing "ARMY" on my chest. strange as it sounds, i wanted to die in that uniform, having it mean something. and now, to me, my life will be basically worthless. you know what that means? destined to walk the earth, a hollow shell who will never see himself as a man. so fuck off.
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We arent self destructing Josh, I havent touched a cigarette since you left last time, im not kidding either. I just stopped one day, I tried it, I enjoyed it to an extent, but I didnt want it to become part of who i am. Josh we are trying to find ourselves right now, everybody is expiermenting with different things, trying to make themselves unique, trying to figure out who THEY are. No one just wakes up one day and knows who they are, we have to figure it out through trial and error. As for the drinking, lemme say this, you have no idea what our drinking habbits are, you wanna know something, I have only been drunk once in my life. I know how ot drink resposibely, and I think I deserve that credit.
And its not that I dont see your perspective Josh, its that I feel like its hard for me to feel bad for you when your upset, when you begin your entry by ripping on someone else who had something emotional happen to them. I realize it sucks to lose something you really wanted, and more so to loose it because of something you had no control over. Im not saying I understand how much it hurts you, if this was as an important a thing to you as you say, then I have never expierenced any loss of that magnitude, BUT I am saying I know the feeling of un-fair loss.
tough love can be good for accomplishing a lot of things Josh, but you have to realize that its still love, and you would never kick someone you love when they are already down.
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if anyone here should fuck off, its me.
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