i don't open my eyes anymore
After a brief period where I honestly thought he would pull through, my grandfather passed away suddenly last week from pneumonia. My initial reaction when people began asking me about him was "oh, we weren't that close; I'll just be going down there with my family for a few days to help out my mother and grandmother." After all the time spent in South Carolina, and all the memories I've sifted through, I believe saying that was a grave error. Distance is all that separated us; a position that especially now I have reason to believe does little to diminish personal relationships. For many years my mom and the au pairs would pack up our little wood-paneled caravan and off we would go to Mt. Pleasant, right outside of Charleston. And for a few months in the summer, I lived exclusively down there with my nanny and poppy. The life I am leading now wasn't something I could have dreamed of back then. I had chores, a library card, and a pretty good neighborhood of kids. Those times have passed now, but to diminish their relevance to the present-day me was unacceptable.
The stress of the past few days brought out some old family grievances and bad blood that was really shocking, given the circumstances. I'm certainly not immune to holding petty differences against others, but I would like to think that I could control myself the morning of a funeral. Despite the minor embarrassing occurrences, I am so thankful for the past few days; thankful to have the opportunity to be there for my grandmother; thankful that my mother was able to be with her family; thankful to our close family friends the Dillons, who have so consistently been the most generous people we know, in paying for our flight down to Charleston; thankful that amid the terrible circumstance I was able to spend a few more days with Allie and Thea. Now I must return to working and commuting for a few days before taking off Thursday to visit Bosco and get up to Boston.
The stress of the past few days brought out some old family grievances and bad blood that was really shocking, given the circumstances. I'm certainly not immune to holding petty differences against others, but I would like to think that I could control myself the morning of a funeral. Despite the minor embarrassing occurrences, I am so thankful for the past few days; thankful to have the opportunity to be there for my grandmother; thankful that my mother was able to be with her family; thankful to our close family friends the Dillons, who have so consistently been the most generous people we know, in paying for our flight down to Charleston; thankful that amid the terrible circumstance I was able to spend a few more days with Allie and Thea. Now I must return to working and commuting for a few days before taking off Thursday to visit Bosco and get up to Boston.