I've been bummin around this town for way too long
I can't sleep and I start what might as well be the rest of my life in the tomorrow that is today. So much has changed between the summer and now, and in many ways I wish I could go back to "that guy." From now till the end of March my life will consist of working and visiting Boston (and other locales), as I struggle to put together enough money to make it in Tokyo. If not for the terrible commute, I would have nothing but fond memories of working. Indeed, at the end of the summer I was somewhat deliriously happy - my ambitions then seem so far-fetched now. I never wrote the book that I burned to write. I never quite succeeded in my personal fitness goals. I've been stressed ever since I heard about Japan, and I've allowed that stress to rule me.
Work, and working around my travel schedule, will have one benefit - my eating regimen will once more consist of the things that I pack with me in the morning. I must subsist on this for the entirety of the day. I managed quite well for a while in Boston; perhaps in the first few weeks my memories of the summer carried me. And I know - how much can I talk about food? About nutrition? It all seemed so superfluous back when I was "messing up" once a week. When that stretched into a daily habit that has affected me ruinously throughout the holidays....I am embarrassed. That I am climbing better than I ever have seems a nearly erroneous footnote in an otherwise very unhealthy time in my life.
As I struggled to sleep before, I thought fondly back to the second semester of last year, and my first few days on the job when I got out of school. I remembered my struggles with Lazarus, my erstwhile ipod that had somewhat miraculously come back to life, only to die on me again a few weeks into the summer (this time, it seemed, for good). Perhaps I could squeeze a little more life out of the guy, I thought. So I found the damned thing and popped it open and began to fiddle, and hey! I got the bugger to work. If I wake up to Andrew Bird in the morning, one good thing will have come of this shaking up in my sleep schedule.
As for now, it's time to once again try my hand at sleeping.
Work, and working around my travel schedule, will have one benefit - my eating regimen will once more consist of the things that I pack with me in the morning. I must subsist on this for the entirety of the day. I managed quite well for a while in Boston; perhaps in the first few weeks my memories of the summer carried me. And I know - how much can I talk about food? About nutrition? It all seemed so superfluous back when I was "messing up" once a week. When that stretched into a daily habit that has affected me ruinously throughout the holidays....I am embarrassed. That I am climbing better than I ever have seems a nearly erroneous footnote in an otherwise very unhealthy time in my life.
As I struggled to sleep before, I thought fondly back to the second semester of last year, and my first few days on the job when I got out of school. I remembered my struggles with Lazarus, my erstwhile ipod that had somewhat miraculously come back to life, only to die on me again a few weeks into the summer (this time, it seemed, for good). Perhaps I could squeeze a little more life out of the guy, I thought. So I found the damned thing and popped it open and began to fiddle, and hey! I got the bugger to work. If I wake up to Andrew Bird in the morning, one good thing will have come of this shaking up in my sleep schedule.
As for now, it's time to once again try my hand at sleeping.