i only know that i can change
I only know that I can change, everything else just stays the same, so now I step out of the darkness that my life became 'coz I just needed someone to talk to, you were just too busy with yourself. You were never there for me to express how I felt, I just stuffed it down, now I'm older and I feel like I can let some of this anger fade, but it seems the surface I am scratching is the bed that I have made.
Most of that doesn't really apply to me, because you were always there for me.
Anyway, my little stalking mission was sucessful today, for the first time in like 3 months. :P and it fucking made my day. I was just about to walk past the stupid church and then Demola walked out. Like yass =P and at first I pretended it was just a coincidence that I walked past there at the same time he came out but we all know that's not quite true. Ended up walking pure ages along the road. Walked through that mad place that I haven't been to for ages. Oh yeah, maybe because I hate it! But it was with him so meh. Was too muddy like ew though. Then we had to go through the fucking graveyard. I hate graveyards. And he pure tried to make me walk on the graves and I lifted my feet off the ground thinking that he would just end up carrying me but turns out we both fell on the ground. On top of a fucking grave like ew. I didn't really like that but I suppose if there's one person I wouldn't mind falling on top of a dead person with it's Demola. Have decided that I'm going to stalk him to wherever he goes to live during the summer. Sorry but I am. Urgh, then a stupid carful of stupid girls went past on the way to his house shouting on him. Urgh stupid fucking girls, they have no right to say his name in their stupid fucking girly voices. I would have threw a brick at them if I didn't think it would have made a bad impression. I ended up walking home with Stuart Little, who is going out with LAURA! :O He smelled nice.
Went to my Nanas later on, ate loads of chocolate. Later still kinda talked to Demola online for a tiny while. I know it must seem to him that I don't want to talk to him or something but truth is I'm just scared to say what I'm thinking incase he gets all pissed off because then it just ruins my day and I can't sleep. Anyway, they're so many thoughts goiing through my head at the one time it's hard to type them all down. I hope he knows what 'bb' stands for. I hope he doesn't mind that nobody compares to him in my eyes. Going to watch that program William and Mary in a bit, I like it now, never used to. Well that was my day. I think I make a lot more sense when I'm not in a bad mood. I haven't did a proper update like I used to for ages.
Most of that doesn't really apply to me, because you were always there for me.
Anyway, my little stalking mission was sucessful today, for the first time in like 3 months. :P and it fucking made my day. I was just about to walk past the stupid church and then Demola walked out. Like yass =P and at first I pretended it was just a coincidence that I walked past there at the same time he came out but we all know that's not quite true. Ended up walking pure ages along the road. Walked through that mad place that I haven't been to for ages. Oh yeah, maybe because I hate it! But it was with him so meh. Was too muddy like ew though. Then we had to go through the fucking graveyard. I hate graveyards. And he pure tried to make me walk on the graves and I lifted my feet off the ground thinking that he would just end up carrying me but turns out we both fell on the ground. On top of a fucking grave like ew. I didn't really like that but I suppose if there's one person I wouldn't mind falling on top of a dead person with it's Demola. Have decided that I'm going to stalk him to wherever he goes to live during the summer. Sorry but I am. Urgh, then a stupid carful of stupid girls went past on the way to his house shouting on him. Urgh stupid fucking girls, they have no right to say his name in their stupid fucking girly voices. I would have threw a brick at them if I didn't think it would have made a bad impression. I ended up walking home with Stuart Little, who is going out with LAURA! :O He smelled nice.
Went to my Nanas later on, ate loads of chocolate. Later still kinda talked to Demola online for a tiny while. I know it must seem to him that I don't want to talk to him or something but truth is I'm just scared to say what I'm thinking incase he gets all pissed off because then it just ruins my day and I can't sleep. Anyway, they're so many thoughts goiing through my head at the one time it's hard to type them all down. I hope he knows what 'bb' stands for. I hope he doesn't mind that nobody compares to him in my eyes. Going to watch that program William and Mary in a bit, I like it now, never used to. Well that was my day. I think I make a lot more sense when I'm not in a bad mood. I haven't did a proper update like I used to for ages.