--> J is for Juxtaposition
It was like we were together again. But even when we walked together, we still walked so far apart. There was that distance between us that we'll never be able to close again. It was a nagging reminder that, even at my best, I wasn't good enough.
This is how I procrastinate for U.S. History essays. In all honesty I have absolutely no idea how to get started on an essay I know I can bullshit. Actually, right now, I think I should have paid just a little more attention, instead of sleeping for an hour in class.
Going to retake the A.P. Statistics test. It’s the only time he’ll let us retake the test, and he said if we score lower, he’ll give us the first score, so I guess I should take it. Makes me feel really Asian, I mean come on, I got a B. But I really need the grade. Hooray for finally giving a shit about school. I feel bad when Janine asks me to explain things because I’ve never been great at explaining things. I could never be a teacher.
I like cooking. I actually really do enjoy it. I had to cook dinner today because my mother was getting home late and we’re going to open house soon. She said it was good and that put a smile on my face. It’s ironic that she told me that I couldn’t do anything right just a few days ago. Oh well, I knew she was stressed, I’m used to it.
I have to write an email to Mr. V about Hawaii because I ran out of time to ask during our auditions. He only gave us four minutes and I was really nervous. Mostly because it was me and Mr. V alone in a room with just a stand between us. Oh baby. I’m feelin’ last chair again. It’s ok, I really don’t mind. It’s like my seat you know? And I kept shaking so I couldn’t control my sound very much and I was playing on two strings a few times. But it’s ok, I don’t mind getting a crappy seat. As long as he knows I practice and I have a certain passion for playing I have a chance at going to Hawaii.
I’m mad because none of the places that I applied for jobs to called back. I really need the money if I want to go to the Hawaii trip. At most we get a half scholarship [which is still like, freaking 700 dollars] and my mother doesn’t really want to do bingo because the ladies there are crazy, so I have to ask if there’s any work that I myself can do to earn the trip. My parent’s are big on earning shit.
It’s definitely the school year. I’m stressed over god knows what. It’s amazing. It’s not like I have super amounts of homework, I’m just… stressed. Like, I don’t really know. I just feel like I’m running out of time to do everything. Maybe it’s something else.
Anyway, open house soon. Get to hang out and direct my mother to my classes because she probably can’t read my writing. I told her she should go because Mr. Crowe was sexy and she was like, okay. My mother is cool sometimes. Then I have to come home and actually work on my U.S History essay, haha. Oh and read Falling Leaves too.
Bleck.
This is how I procrastinate for U.S. History essays. In all honesty I have absolutely no idea how to get started on an essay I know I can bullshit. Actually, right now, I think I should have paid just a little more attention, instead of sleeping for an hour in class.
Going to retake the A.P. Statistics test. It’s the only time he’ll let us retake the test, and he said if we score lower, he’ll give us the first score, so I guess I should take it. Makes me feel really Asian, I mean come on, I got a B. But I really need the grade. Hooray for finally giving a shit about school. I feel bad when Janine asks me to explain things because I’ve never been great at explaining things. I could never be a teacher.
I like cooking. I actually really do enjoy it. I had to cook dinner today because my mother was getting home late and we’re going to open house soon. She said it was good and that put a smile on my face. It’s ironic that she told me that I couldn’t do anything right just a few days ago. Oh well, I knew she was stressed, I’m used to it.
I have to write an email to Mr. V about Hawaii because I ran out of time to ask during our auditions. He only gave us four minutes and I was really nervous. Mostly because it was me and Mr. V alone in a room with just a stand between us. Oh baby. I’m feelin’ last chair again. It’s ok, I really don’t mind. It’s like my seat you know? And I kept shaking so I couldn’t control my sound very much and I was playing on two strings a few times. But it’s ok, I don’t mind getting a crappy seat. As long as he knows I practice and I have a certain passion for playing I have a chance at going to Hawaii.
I’m mad because none of the places that I applied for jobs to called back. I really need the money if I want to go to the Hawaii trip. At most we get a half scholarship [which is still like, freaking 700 dollars] and my mother doesn’t really want to do bingo because the ladies there are crazy, so I have to ask if there’s any work that I myself can do to earn the trip. My parent’s are big on earning shit.
It’s definitely the school year. I’m stressed over god knows what. It’s amazing. It’s not like I have super amounts of homework, I’m just… stressed. Like, I don’t really know. I just feel like I’m running out of time to do everything. Maybe it’s something else.
Anyway, open house soon. Get to hang out and direct my mother to my classes because she probably can’t read my writing. I told her she should go because Mr. Crowe was sexy and she was like, okay. My mother is cool sometimes. Then I have to come home and actually work on my U.S History essay, haha. Oh and read Falling Leaves too.
Bleck.