Lindsay Stark and I are brilliant. Brrrrrrrrrrilliant.
EXT: VENICE BEACH, DAY
Walking back to the car from the Boardwalk.
Lindsay begins to sing her part from the opening of Edges, the show we're doing in August. And somehow, the stars aligned and the gods spoke...
...and the Edges parody was born.
It's a work in progress.
Alternate Lyrics to "Become," opening number of Edges:
Man 1:
I'm 19 and male, I've have a girlfriend for a year
But there's something that I should probably tell her...
The relationship's grown stale, and I'm starting to fear,
That in her place, I'd prefer a feller!
There you are, I'm a great big homo
Instead of the beaver, I like the cock,
She was great, we had fun together
But I'd rather leave her for a jock
I just can't wait to give a blowjob!
I think I might just become a slut,
'Cause suddenly I am longing
To take a huge dick up the butt.
Chorus to be completed
Woman 1:
I'm 30 and unwed, I read Cosmo every day
And I believe a woman has a right to choose... to abort her baby.
I get them in my bed, they all cum but never stay
And suddenly I realize I'm two weeks overdue.
So it's time, grab the vaccum cleaner
Stick it way up there and say goodbye
Look at me, I am not with child
Can't tell my parents, I'd better lie...
"Yes Daddy, I am still a virgin"
He's still convinced that I've never strayed.
I'm still his baby in the convent,
But every night I'm getting laid.
Chorus
Man 2:
I hang out by the school, follow kids home from the park
I have a law degree but I fuck children instead!
Down at the local pool I get them all to play shark
And before their parents notice, they are naked in my bed.
There you go, I'm a pediphile
I make Michael Jackson look like the Pope!
When we're done, we both take a shower
And if I am lucky they drop the soap.
Fifteen arrests and no convictions!
And seven more they don't know about.
Those tears of theirs won't prove I'm guilty
No matter how they scream and shout.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh and PS, for those of you who like to watch natural disasters and car wrecks, BatBoy opens next weekend.
PPS: You know it's summer when you find yourself racing back and forth between a spa and a freezing cold pool with eight other half-naked people at about 1 in the morning on a Monday. I love you Bridgette!
My sister comes home tomorrow night. YAY!
She's meeting Brandon Thursday night. YAY!
I'm graduating on Saturday. YAY!
My dad will be there. ::fizzle::
Walking back to the car from the Boardwalk.
Lindsay begins to sing her part from the opening of Edges, the show we're doing in August. And somehow, the stars aligned and the gods spoke...
...and the Edges parody was born.
It's a work in progress.
Alternate Lyrics to "Become," opening number of Edges:
Man 1:
I'm 19 and male, I've have a girlfriend for a year
But there's something that I should probably tell her...
The relationship's grown stale, and I'm starting to fear,
That in her place, I'd prefer a feller!
There you are, I'm a great big homo
Instead of the beaver, I like the cock,
She was great, we had fun together
But I'd rather leave her for a jock
I just can't wait to give a blowjob!
I think I might just become a slut,
'Cause suddenly I am longing
To take a huge dick up the butt.
Chorus to be completed
Woman 1:
I'm 30 and unwed, I read Cosmo every day
And I believe a woman has a right to choose... to abort her baby.
I get them in my bed, they all cum but never stay
And suddenly I realize I'm two weeks overdue.
So it's time, grab the vaccum cleaner
Stick it way up there and say goodbye
Look at me, I am not with child
Can't tell my parents, I'd better lie...
"Yes Daddy, I am still a virgin"
He's still convinced that I've never strayed.
I'm still his baby in the convent,
But every night I'm getting laid.
Chorus
Man 2:
I hang out by the school, follow kids home from the park
I have a law degree but I fuck children instead!
Down at the local pool I get them all to play shark
And before their parents notice, they are naked in my bed.
There you go, I'm a pediphile
I make Michael Jackson look like the Pope!
When we're done, we both take a shower
And if I am lucky they drop the soap.
Fifteen arrests and no convictions!
And seven more they don't know about.
Those tears of theirs won't prove I'm guilty
No matter how they scream and shout.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh and PS, for those of you who like to watch natural disasters and car wrecks, BatBoy opens next weekend.
PPS: You know it's summer when you find yourself racing back and forth between a spa and a freezing cold pool with eight other half-naked people at about 1 in the morning on a Monday. I love you Bridgette!
My sister comes home tomorrow night. YAY!
She's meeting Brandon Thursday night. YAY!
I'm graduating on Saturday. YAY!
My dad will be there. ::fizzle::