(no subject)
No, everything is NOT well.
Funny how many friends I have until I need something. Where the fuck are you all now? All I get are empty questions about how I am. I am horrible. There is your fucking answer. I am doing very badly and do not expect that I will be doing as well as I was before anytime soon.
Now, world, unless you really want to try and help me, go ahead and be hurt that I said what I did. I'll probably regret it later, but I also probably shouldn't. I've always wanted to say it. I am so goddamn sick and tired of worrying about getting you all to fucking like me by being nice and helping out. Fucking sick and tired of letting everyone walk all over me.
I'm sure I'll change my mind later. I'll go back to being a pushover again for a week, a month, a year, a decade...but not forever. And then something will set me off again and I'll probably do this all over again. Because the person I'm most angry with is not all you "friends" out there, it's myself. I can't believe I let people treat me the way they do. But I suppose that I'll continue to let you all push me around eventually because I don't know how else to be.
But not right now. Right now I'm pissed and I want you all to fuck off and leave me alone- unless you're willing to step up and be there for me.
Did I hurt your feelings? I will be sorry later, I'm sure. But not now. I don't give a flying fuck. I've earned this little rant, and much more. And if I really hurt you, then prove I'm not talking about you. Fucking prove it. DO something, anything. Take me out. Give me a listen. Visit me. I don't care, you fucking think of something for a change. Be a real friend.
Funny how many friends I have until I need something. Where the fuck are you all now? All I get are empty questions about how I am. I am horrible. There is your fucking answer. I am doing very badly and do not expect that I will be doing as well as I was before anytime soon.
Now, world, unless you really want to try and help me, go ahead and be hurt that I said what I did. I'll probably regret it later, but I also probably shouldn't. I've always wanted to say it. I am so goddamn sick and tired of worrying about getting you all to fucking like me by being nice and helping out. Fucking sick and tired of letting everyone walk all over me.
I'm sure I'll change my mind later. I'll go back to being a pushover again for a week, a month, a year, a decade...but not forever. And then something will set me off again and I'll probably do this all over again. Because the person I'm most angry with is not all you "friends" out there, it's myself. I can't believe I let people treat me the way they do. But I suppose that I'll continue to let you all push me around eventually because I don't know how else to be.
But not right now. Right now I'm pissed and I want you all to fuck off and leave me alone- unless you're willing to step up and be there for me.
Did I hurt your feelings? I will be sorry later, I'm sure. But not now. I don't give a flying fuck. I've earned this little rant, and much more. And if I really hurt you, then prove I'm not talking about you. Fucking prove it. DO something, anything. Take me out. Give me a listen. Visit me. I don't care, you fucking think of something for a change. Be a real friend.