13 months later....
Surprise, surprise, it's actually been thirteen agonizingly long and seeming unending months since I've actually seen my laptop. I very much miss the feeling of having my own computer (especially one that works!), and I am more than sick of holding a ninja takeover of my mother's desktop any time I need or want online.
For those (all except for one lucky person) who've since become convinced that I dropped off the face of the earth in the past year or so, it's not so. I've simply been laying low, keeping off the radar (not entirely intentionally, mind you), and making some steps into becoming fully independent once more and figuring out my life.
There were years, as many of you knew and saw, that my life had only one focus and direction. I remained incredibly sheltered and naive. (painfully so, looking back on it!) I thought I knew what I wanted, but once I finally got out on my own, I came to the shocking and quite terrifying realization that I had not a sweet clue where I wanted my life to go or what I could see myself doing.
For two and a half years, I ran away from life. I jumped from place to place, in and out of school, never able to focus, and always insecure.
Well, I finally sucked it up, and asked for help. It meant moving back to my parents', letting my insecurity ruin what could have been my best relationship yet, job hopping, and a serious lack of computer with undue amounts of stress. Things are starting to look up though. I've been going to a homeopathic counselor to help regain my focus, figure out what it is that I want, and finally be happy and confident in my own skin. I do feel that it has helped me relax quite a bit, and though I still have days where I revert to my overbearing insecure behavior, more days are now spent happy and confident.
As I need to get offline, again, I shall finish this update at a later date.
For those (all except for one lucky person) who've since become convinced that I dropped off the face of the earth in the past year or so, it's not so. I've simply been laying low, keeping off the radar (not entirely intentionally, mind you), and making some steps into becoming fully independent once more and figuring out my life.
There were years, as many of you knew and saw, that my life had only one focus and direction. I remained incredibly sheltered and naive. (painfully so, looking back on it!) I thought I knew what I wanted, but once I finally got out on my own, I came to the shocking and quite terrifying realization that I had not a sweet clue where I wanted my life to go or what I could see myself doing.
For two and a half years, I ran away from life. I jumped from place to place, in and out of school, never able to focus, and always insecure.
Well, I finally sucked it up, and asked for help. It meant moving back to my parents', letting my insecurity ruin what could have been my best relationship yet, job hopping, and a serious lack of computer with undue amounts of stress. Things are starting to look up though. I've been going to a homeopathic counselor to help regain my focus, figure out what it is that I want, and finally be happy and confident in my own skin. I do feel that it has helped me relax quite a bit, and though I still have days where I revert to my overbearing insecure behavior, more days are now spent happy and confident.
As I need to get offline, again, I shall finish this update at a later date.