(no subject)
Seventeen days after reliving those last few hours of the war, I feel the best that I have yet, the closest to myself, again. I just can't believe it took me so long to find something that hits back. It's the biggest resource we have, here- the ocean- and I couldn't see it. I kept looking inside and coming up against walls, but I couldn't beat myself against them hard enough.
I'm probably afraid they'll come down.
I left my slacks and dark blue t-shirt folded on the sand with my shoes, and dove into the water off the south west beach. A half hour out and I had cleared the sandbar and the peninsula and had hit open water. I considered, briefly, heading for the second island- I haven't seen it yet, and I should. It's there, after all, part of the makeup of the place- but instead I struck out further into the blue.
The water is calm enough past the initial breaking point but farther out the waves get bigger, the bottom drops away and disappears and there's only blue above and blue fading into deep, shadowy green below, and when I hit that point I should have turned back.
Should have, but didn't.
It's the middle of the afternoon by the time my feet touch sand, again, and there's a slight ache in my muscles that lets me know I pushed myself, was out there longer than I was necessarily wise. It feels good, though. I feel good.
It's a welcome change, to be honest.
I push both of my hands over my face and back through my hair, shaking the excess water away and wiping the salt from my eyes. When I drop them and lift my head again, I realize I'm not alone on the beach. There's still a few yards between us, but I raise my hand in greeting and nod.
“Afternoon.”
[Timed to mid-afternoon on the 28th. Swimsuit style reference. Only it's solid blue.]
I'm probably afraid they'll come down.
I left my slacks and dark blue t-shirt folded on the sand with my shoes, and dove into the water off the south west beach. A half hour out and I had cleared the sandbar and the peninsula and had hit open water. I considered, briefly, heading for the second island- I haven't seen it yet, and I should. It's there, after all, part of the makeup of the place- but instead I struck out further into the blue.
The water is calm enough past the initial breaking point but farther out the waves get bigger, the bottom drops away and disappears and there's only blue above and blue fading into deep, shadowy green below, and when I hit that point I should have turned back.
Should have, but didn't.
It's the middle of the afternoon by the time my feet touch sand, again, and there's a slight ache in my muscles that lets me know I pushed myself, was out there longer than I was necessarily wise. It feels good, though. I feel good.
It's a welcome change, to be honest.
I push both of my hands over my face and back through my hair, shaking the excess water away and wiping the salt from my eyes. When I drop them and lift my head again, I realize I'm not alone on the beach. There's still a few yards between us, but I raise my hand in greeting and nod.
“Afternoon.”
[Timed to mid-afternoon on the 28th. Swimsuit style reference. Only it's solid blue.]
