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[with_diamonds]

Most days, Lucy tried not to think about how much she missed her brother. It crossed her mind, of course, on a regular basis - living with Mathias, she had a near-constant reminder of it, which helped in that she'd gotten used to it, let it become normal - but it no longer held the enormity it once did. A year and a half down the line, and it was

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[with_diamonds]

Caught up in the words on the page - not really anything new, though she didn't think she'd been expressly told any of it before - it took Lucy a moment to realize that she'd drawn someone's attention and was no longer alone. When she did, though, peripheral vision picking up a motion, she let out a breath as if she'd been holding it, taking a seat on the stool that had been placed behind her. This might not have been half as upsetting as other things the island had done, but it still left her shaky on her feet, the realizations it brought to light as disarming as the object itself, if not more so. How this always happened, she didn't know, but this, she was sure, was all she needed not to let it do so again. Max might not have been here anymore, but that didn't mean moving on.

There was still a balance to be struck, though. Makeshift family on the island was still family, and so it was that she summoned up a faint smile when she turned her head fully in Ishiah's direction, weak but heartfelt. "Thanks."

[with_diamonds]

"I'm not sure there's much to say," Lucy said, leaning into him even so, notably grateful. Ishiah wasn't Max, not by a long shot, but he was among the people closest to family she had without trying to be a substitute for anyone, and at a time like this, she could appreciate that. People came and people went, but at least she wasn't on her own.

She'd been happy, was the thing. And it was hard to gauge, in the moment, if this would really disrupt that or not, but certainly it put things in perspective. God, she'd gotten so far ahead of herself, thinking that everything was as it was supposed to be. It wasn't, not by a long shot. For that to be the case, a lot of history would have to be changed, and good though she'd become at taking whatever she could get, knowing it wouldn't likely last, it all still came down to one thing.

"He should be here," she continued, quieter than before. Four words was oversimplifying it, but she suspected he would understand. "He was always supposed to be here."

[with_diamonds]

"What, of proof one way or the other?" Lucy asked, keeping close solely because she could, regardless of whatever point he was trying to make. She wouldn't have called herself a pessimist necessarily - she got too easily devoted to causes for that, and never once thought it useless - but cynicism, pragmatism, was bred deep in her. Given everything that had happened, everything that she'd been through, both here and otherwise, she wasn't about to hold her breath sitting and waiting for him to come back; it would have been without a point, and almost certainly led to her heart getting broken. He did have a point, but she wasn't sure how much good that would do. Besides, it only stood to reason when everyone disappeared eventually. Someday it would be her, and she would go home and be able to make sense of everything again. Until then, there was just this. "People do come back, it's happened before, I just... think the chances are pretty slim."

[with_diamonds]

"I'm not sure Max could ever have a life that's stable," Lucy said, and in quick succession, she was fighting back a smile and then tears in her eyes, the latter prompted by the former. God, she missed him, the way she imagined one would miss a limb that had been severed, or a home they were forcibly kept away from. She had no such place, but Max - well, the way she saw it, he was her home, and maybe that was the problem. She'd tried to move on, but in being reminded of it (of him) again, she knew nothing else could compare. There would never be anyone for her like her brother. "But... that does help. To hear." Maybe she couldn't have quite so much faith, but it had to count if someone else did.

[with_diamonds]

Lucy shook her head, though the smile she offered was appreciative, more than a little. "I don't think it's about what it says," she murmured, though her fingertips traced against the page anyway, letters describing her brother, who was there but not here. "I think it's just about him. I know he winds up fine after this, anyway - as fine as anyone ever can be." Which wasn't at all, of course, but speaking purely about the physical, then she knew he recovered. If nothing else, she could hold on to that to be a comfort, too. "Reading it probably isn't going to do much good."

Then again, she'd always had a bit of a masochistic streak where her feelings were concerned.

[with_diamonds]

"We can talk about that," Lucy said, shoulders lifting in an easy shrug, the same small smile still in place. It was hard to think about a wedding at all with these papers in front of her, but that much, she didn't want to talk about. Pete himself, though, that was fair game, and probably only made sense, considering what she'd found out about her last relationship. She wasn't going to make the same mistakes this time that she had with the man she'd known to be Bruce Anderson. "Or, well, him, I guess. What did you want to know?"