She'd worked herself to the bone.
She needed to get herself into shape. She needed it. It didn't seem to matter that there wasn't any performance. There wasn't any opening. There was only Nina, and now there was Lily with her eyes smiles and dark eyes, and Thomas with all his concern that she didn't understand
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The last time that he'd seriously danced had been ten or so years ago. In other words, it had been a considerable amount of time, but, rusty or not, he'd remained generally active. He'd started out in the corps, and no one simply forgot training like that. He wasn't really dressed to dance (a grey sweater and black slacks - the clothes box had been taken by a kind mood a couple of days ago), but he seemed instantly more comfortable once he was in the actual space, although a fraction of that ease slipped away halfway across the threshold as he was immediately met by the sight of a girl in the middle of a fouetté (or rather, a series of them).
Once again, he shouldn't really have been surprised. Nina.
It was too late to be completely subtle in coming into the studio, but he did his best to close the door quietly, keeping his eyes on her as he did.
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Just behind her, someone was laughing.
"Thomas," she said, stretching her calf muscles and offering him a tentative smile in the mirror.
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He had to wonder if she'd kept practicing since arriving here; he wouldn't have put it past her despite there being no performance to prepare for anymore. Just as he'd eventually decided to come down and visit the studio, dance wasn't something anyone just let go.
It didn't even occur to him to ask if she minded that he stayed, the next words out of his mouth instead: "Working on the coda?"
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She watched him out of the corner of her eye, her focus narrowed in on him and only him, while she tried to pretend she wasn't staring. After all the practicing, weeks and weeks of it, the last time they'd been alone in a room together, she'd humiliated herself.
Open your mouth... Open it...
"It's important I don't lose it." Of anyone, she knew Thomas would understand.
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He knew full well how their last solo encounter had gone, and the recollection, while not easy per se to drown out, was also not, so far, the crux of what was going on here.
"How does it feel?" Beyond familiar, came the tacit end. He wanted to know how the dance felt to her - how she thought she was doing. It was rare that he ever brought himself around to that question, but it wasn't one he failed completely in reaching.
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"A little clumsy," she added, "I've been keeping up with it as best I can, but when I first got here, I..." she trailed off, unable to put words to how she'd felt, torn away from the most important night of her life, and literally dumped on a beach worlds away from anyone she knew. She'd hardly kept up with her warm-ups, let alone put on a pair of pointe shoes.
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"Don't worry about it," he said, although he knew the words were fairly hollow. You're so close, he wanted to say, and although the words never left his mouth, they were obvious in the way that he regarded her as he crossed his arms across his chest, head canting to one side.
"Well. Let's see it."
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"Wait-- Now?" she asked, hating how meek her voice sounded. Again. Always. She could feel it, feel herself trying to gather up a little more strength, to grow a fucking spine for once, but she withered every time. The pristine flower. The little ingenue. Sweet, sweet girl. My little princess.
"But I..."
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Within an instant, however, he relented, lips pulling to one side, not in a smile but in an expression that was warmer than the one he'd been wearing.
"At least we're not running on a deadline." (Both a blessing and a curse, but not a point he intended to bring up.)
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When it came to him, she would always have something to prove.
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"Whenever you're ready."
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