i am sixteen going on seventeen

[lucked]

Claire can't quite remember when birthday parties got to be a pain. It's probably, she thinks, balled up with all of the other stuff that started losing its luster once she made it into high school, once Jackie told her clearly that high school was Claire's chance to make something out of herself rather than just sit idly by and daydreaming,

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[backward]

Effy recognizes Eden at once, the recollection of their first and only meeting in the snow one that brings a surprising amount of peace to Effy's mind, even a month later, also she still can't quite put her finger on why. It was interesting conversation, certainly, but also surprisingly deep for two near strangers, which tends to invite a certain level of uneasiness. She does worry about having exposed too much of herself, but once Effy spots the other woman, it's difficult to turn around and head in the opposite direction, particularly when she knows she has more than likely been seen in return.

It won't hurt, she decides, to stop and say hello. Eden is with company (she vaguely remembers meeting the blonde before) which means the conversation is bound to be cut short. Mouthing her greeting, Effy raises her fingers in a wave as she comes to a half before both women and a small boy, offering the latter a small, rather painfully forced smile.

[wishesandsmoke]

Eden waves in kind, smiling. Their conversation might not have been particularly happy, but it was pleasant in its way, the kind of honest talk that, for Eden at least, lightens the burden of that honesty a little. "Hello, Effy," she says. "Care to sit?" All she has to do right now, after all, is be present to make sure Nate's okay, and she's certain he's in good hands with Claire. After sand cakes, it'll probably be time for castles and that she can do, but for the moment, she's more intent on making time for Effy, too, if she wants it.

[lucked]

Although she can't place a finger on the name (and wonders if she should be able to, with the way that Eden waves, clearly familiar), Claire's seen the other girl before. It takes her a while to figure it out, her brow furrowing in confusion and probably not at all polite while she waves back, before her eyes suddenly widen in recognition. The house party. This girl is just another of many people that Claire met at the house party, and the very memory of it makes Claire's cheeks flush a bright red, wondering if this girl saw. Wondering if her first impression of Claire was... blonde floozy, or some other equivalent.

"Hey, Effy," Claire chimes in, grateful for Eden's name drop and keeping one hand gently wrapped around Nate's wrist as he starts walking around them all in circles. "I'm Claire, I don't think we've properly met."

[backward]

Wordlessly, Effy bows her head in a nod and lowers herself onto the sand, taking Eden up on the offer of a seat. She finds herself somewhat helpless in such a situation, not quite knowing what to say or how to act, but doing her best not to let it show. It involves more smiling than is usual, for Effy, as she attempts to play the part of someone far more pleasant and social than herself. (There was a time, months ago, when she wouldn't have given a single fuck how she came off to these people. A time before Tabula Rasa, when she was afforded the luxury of being a solitary spirit, when she had all the drink and drugs needed to dim the loneliness to a minimum. That time is gone, now, and she has to make due.)

"Claire," she repeats with another small nod, "yeah, I've seen you round before."

[wishesandsmoke]

"Small island," Eden says lightly. She doesn't miss the way Claire blushes, which makes her wonder what's going on there, but this isn't the time or place to ask or pry; she makes a mental note to ask later if it doesn't come up naturally (it probably won't, she thinks) and blows a kiss to Nate as he passes. Sooner or later, everyone's seen everyone else, whether or not they know them. "How have you been, Effy?"

[lucked]

Fortunately for Claire, it doesn't look like Effy cares to give away the blonde's rather illicit activities from last month while in Eden's presence; she sighs just enough to let go of all of the tension in her shoulders, focusing on Nate instead as he rounds. For his part, the toddler continually makes little glances in Effy's direction, perhaps noticing the gentle wave of her curls in the light ocean breeze, but ends up toddling his way back over to Eden and clinging to the back of her shirt.

"Yeah, small island," Claire agrees lightly with a raise of both brows, before settling into the background, in a manner of speaking. She's always content to simply watch people, to listen idly to conversation and not have to worry about speaking and inserting her own foot in her mouth. Eden's probably a better person to talk to Effy anyway, the older woman always calm and capable of connecting to just about anyone, it seemed.

[backward]

For separate reasons altogether, Effy is similarly content to fade into the background, having always entertained a knack for observation, be it of other people or animals or objects; anything exciting enough to catch her attention and hold it would do. As the newcomer, however, she isn't afforded that luxury and can only hope that the other two will take it upon themselves to provide the bulk of conversation. In many ways, she has yet to develop social skills beyond those of a teenage girl who for quite some time remained mute by choice.

"Well," she answers, a simple enough word for a happy enough statement, although truth be told, that might be something of an overstatement. But then, the same would go for most around here, few people fortunate not to be suffering from the debilitating consequences of ennui and homesickness. Effy gestures at the boy, furling a brow as she glances back toward Eden. Her suspicion is that Eden isn't the mother, but it's best not to assume, either way.

[wishesandsmoke]

At that, Eden glances back over shoulder at Nate with a bright smile. "Hey, kid," she says lightly. "Say hi to Effy. Effy, this is Claire's cousin Nate." He's grown up so quickly or she's been here so long. Either way it startles her sometimes, how fast the time has gone by - a lifetime for both of them. She's never spent all that much time with him, though, not on her own, and that probably exacerbates the sense of his growing by leaps and bounds a bit. "His parents are gone, but you have your daddies, don't you, Nate?"

[lucked]

It feels a little strange to be leaving much of the conversation to a boy so young he can't even put full sentences together, most of the time, but Nate's cute enough that Claire just watches him in amusement, hands twining together and resting lightly on her knees. Nate leans out just slightly to peek past Eden and gives a shy wave. "Effy," he says brightly, able to wrap his tongue around that name pretty easily, before he beams at Eden. "Nate have two daddies."

He holds out two fingers for emphasis.

Claire beams at he boy, before turning back to look at Effy. "He was born on the island, and my uncle... went back to New York, but it's like having a piece of him here. He really looks like Peter."

[backward]

To say that Effy isn't great with children is an understatement at the very least, but that doesn't mean she's never put forth an effort, especially here on the island. In fact, until coming here, she can't recall a time in her life when she was around so many children. None so young, at least, and never in situations where she was forced to interact with them. It makes her nervous still, not out of any aversion but out of distrust in herself; no one, if they really knew about her, would let her be an influence on their children.

"Hey Nate," she waves at the boy, giving her best attempt at an easy smile. She almost mentions the fact that she has just the one father, who happens to be a prick, but thinks better of it before opening her mouth. "You're… how old?"

[wishesandsmoke]

"Nate, Effy's asking how old you are," Eden adds when no answer seems forthcoming. Like many children his age, he's a bit easily distracted, but she just smiles, taking hold of his hand. There's a part of her that enjoys this, getting to play a part in taking care of him every now and again, mothering every child to cross her path, though there's something bittersweet in it, too. "Can you tell her how old you are?"

[lucked]

Claire stretches out on the sand then, her stomach facing down and drawing warmth from the sun-washed beaches. Seeing his cousin laying on the beach like that, Nate only manages a shy little giggle before he lets go of Eden's hand to also drop down, the sand sticking to his chin as he mimics Claire's actions, encouraged by her smiles and laughter, light and easy. He shoots a toothy grin up at Effy, index finger digging into the dimple on his cheek before he holds out a hand, then shapes it into a V.

"Nate is two," he tells her with a firm nod, before folding both arms under his chin and kicking up some sand with his feet. "How old Effy?"

[backward]

Even for someone so averse to the very idea of children, someone such as Effy, the scene which unfolds before her is one that is undeniably precious. It takes a lot to bring a genuine smile to her face these days, but Nate seems to have unlocked the secret and has apparently taken to abusing that discovery to the fullest. "Effy's seventeen," she tells the boy, raising both hands to flash ten fingers, then seven.

[wishesandsmoke]

"Practically ancient," teases Eden. There's something old about Effy, though, that much is true, a weight that Eden understands well enough that she still believes she might just be projecting. Though having Claire in her life makes things easier than they might otherwise have been, gives her purpose and focus, it's not quite enough to keep the sadness off Eden more often than not. When everything seems just a little too heavy, it's difficult not to try and shift the burden to someone else, just to feel less alone for a moment. It's good, though, to see Effy smile.

[lucked]

Nate stares in a bit of awe at all the fingers that Effy has to put up in order to make it to seventeen. Of course, Nate's heard some numbers now and again that are bigger, knows that he can say that people look like they're fifty, or even a hundred, and everyone will laugh and be delighted by it, but there's something about seeing every finger put up that makes him pause, staring. Soon enough, though, he turns to Eden as she talks, his gaze lingering there and a tiny knit of worry passing over his brow.

"Hey, I'm also at that so-called 'practically ancient' age," Claire protests, even though she laughs, letting Nate climb off her lap without really registering anything as the toddler plops himself down to Eden and gives her a hug there, the side of his head pressed against Eden's chest while he stares back at Effy with a shy little smile.

[backward]

Often, Effy is quick to cite other people as the problem, relieving herself of any blame for being less than endearing in social situations. The truth, however, is far more simple: she has never had the talent with people - at people, even - that Tony always did, and despite her best efforts, she typically comes up short. (There have been times, of course, when this hasn't been the case, but they have far decreased in numbers since her brother went away. Unfortunate, yes, but also to be expected.)

"Do you know the slap-hand game?" She asks Nate, mostly for lack of anything better to offer the conversation, but also in an effort to entertain him. Children's games are hardly the pinnacle of fun, but a two-year-old boy can't know that yet.