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[does_not_pine]

An optimistic person might say it only takes Scott four hours to show up at the abandoned building, but Kim’s pretty sure optimists don’t get kidnapped by psychotic Japanese twins at four in the morning, strung up in a cage in a condemned building and left to stew until drunk on way too much tequila becomes still drunk and kind of hung over, still

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[not_the_s]

The clothes box has been mocking him for the last two days. When he doesn't feel like doing laundry, his dafault reaction is to grab some clothes from the clothes box and he'll return them later. He definitely hasn't been in the mood for laundry.

Of course that does mean that he has to put up with what the clothes box and, so far, it's given him nothing but S shirts. In fact, it's given him nothing but a blue shirt with Clark's standard symbol instead of his own red and black take on the symbol.

He wandered into the kitchen, opened the fridge, and closed it again when he didn't see anything he felt like having. About a minute later, he opened it a second time and peered in. Yet again, he closed it when the thought of juice again didn't seem at all appealing.

Wasn't it Zesti time, yet?

[does_not_pine]

"Is the fridge magic too," Kim intones from one of the tables, leaning over her coffee and glowering at pretty much everything. Especially the asshole who won't stop opening the fridge. "Do the contents change every time you open it?"

Anyone else might sound genuinely interested: Kim doesn't do interested, especially when she's pretty sure he's just being stupid.

[not_the_s]

"You know, it'd be nice if it did. I'm hungry, but not for anything in here." He checks out the fridge one last time and shakes his head. "I'm going to have to wait until...New Years' I think. Then...pizza. Soda. Zesti." Oh, he couldn't wait to hand Bart a six-pack of Zesti. Of course, they might never pull him back down from the ceiling, but...

Well, it'd be worth it anyway.

[does_not_pine]

"And here I thought starving yourself for months for a slice of pizza was something only teenage girls did," Kim drawls, wrapping her thin fingers firmly around her cup of coffee and adjusting her posture so she can lean and glower more comfortably. "You know you could just learn to make it from scratch."

[not_the_s]

Kon opens his mouth, closes it, and frowns. How do you make pizza? Do they even have all of the ingredients? He doesn't think so, but it's entirely possible that they do. He just doesn't do all a lot of the cooking. Or any if he's really honest with himself.

Well, anyway, he can answer the first accusation. "It's not about starving myself. The island only gives people any food they want a couple of times a year. Everytime else, it's boar burger."

[does_not_pine]

At first Kim thinks she's maybe broken him with earth logic, then she realizes it probably has no affect, since he clearly doesn't operate on a level that understands sarcasm. You know, like the underdeveloped mind of a child. "Okay, you're not dabbling in an eating disorder then: if you're hungry, settle for the burger. Just stop fucking around in the fridge."

She stops then, because she realizes how much she sounds like her mom. No, worse, like his mom. "At least until I'm too far away to watch you do it," she amends.

[not_the_s]

"Yes, mom," Kon replies dryly. He glances over at her and grins. "Shouldn't you be telling me to do something like eat my vegetables, too?" He shuts the door and leans against it, watching her. "Except that you don't look like my mom. Not that I have one."

[does_not_pine]

"You can be my dark-haired stepchild," she says, brow arched more out of habit than interest. "But only if your dad's filthy rich and aging really well.

"I'm Kim."

[not_the_s]

"I'm already someone's dark-haired stepchild, and one of my dad is filthy rich back home." Kon had to think about the last qualification. "Well, you can say that Lex is aging well, but only because he's a lot younger than when I knew him. Maybe twenty, thirty years younger? More than that."

[does_not_pine]

Wallace had called this place a gay mecca, so the more-than-one-dad and no mom bit doesn't really faze her.

Oh wait, she's on a magic gay island after sitting in a cage for four hours, nothing is going to faze her ever again. "What a shame," she says dryly, wishing she'd gotten a magazine or something to flip through. "So are there any straight guys on this island or am I just that lucky," she asks, leaning her head on her hand and thinking maybe it would be kind of awesome to watch boys be stupid to each other instead of her for a change.

[not_the_s]

Kon snorted and raised his hand. "Just what do you think I am?" He chuckled. "You're not going to be all by your lonesome, I promise. People hook up here faster than I can keep count. I'm pretty sure I don't know one person who's stayed single longer than a month." Except for him, of course. He always stayed single.