(Untitled)

[fear_no_words]

The things you never realize that you miss hurt the most. Because when you realize just what you've been living without, you feel the pain of it and all that time spent away crashing down on your heart at once

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[leftwithmybones]

He lingers for a moment, just outside of her eyesight before stepping inwards. Hell, he's not sure what to think about these things. He still doesn't know what to make of the man he sees on that screen, not when he doesn't know how much they share of their past and what the future holds for him. Inevitably, though, he remembers this isn't about him and settles down beside her and offers his hand to her, just in case. "I might just be a simple country doctor, but I recognize someone needing cheering up when I see it."

[fear_no_words]

She took his hand without question or pause, just a natural movement of trust and welcome. With her other hand, Uhura brushed the trickles of tears from her cheeks, grateful for once for the significant lack of eyeliner and mascara among her toiletries.

"Oh, I'm fine," she assured him though her voice was still thick with emotion. "Just.. nostalgic, that's all. It's been so long..."

[leftwithmybones]

It's more than easy to use his other arm and lean forward, draping it around her shoulders and bringing her close enough to comfort. Hell, it's not like he understands half of this -- about worlds colliding and what-not, but he knows that he'd want the comfort, even if he never knows how to ask for it. "I can't exactly offer a lyre, but I do have a good shoulder to cry on. You could always tell me...about them," he finishes, slightly unsure, but knowing he can manage.

[fear_no_words]

With a sniffle she let her head fall to his shoulder. It wasn't the same, not nearly, as it would have been with her McCoy, but the thought, the effort counted and helped. She felt so alone sometimes and knowing that despite their differences he cared helped.

She laughed -- a strangled little sound -- at the mention of the lyre. "You wouldn't be any good at it anyway, sorry," she told him with a faint smile. "Spock said that I was the only human he knew with any aptitude for it. I know he looks so put out in this -- He always looks put out, doesn't he? -- but we used to do this all the time. More so when we were both junior officers."

[leftwithmybones]

"Spock looking put out is a general normality of my day," McCoy complains wryly. "When he's not being that thorn in my side or pain in the ass or whatever other description is fit to describe him." He's only muttering lightly, though, nothing that will end his life. "When did you both start serving aboard the ship?"

[fear_no_words]

"2262," she answered without thinking, then caught herself and amended her words. "I transferred to the Enterprise six years ago, but Spock had been there for years before."

[leftwithmybones]

"Strange," he says, scoffing mildly. Strange because it's years before that to him and he's already on the damn ship. Strange because the former universe changed because of that very Spock hop-skip-and-jumping through into their time. "He was serving with Pike at the Academy a couple years before that for me, too," he offers mildly. "Far as I know. I didn't exactly keep tabs on him before he ripped Jim a new one in front of the whole damn class."

[fear_no_words]

She tried to hide her laugh at the turn of phrase, and failed miserably but kept it small. It was amusing to hear, but not all that surprising.

"Not in my world," she said. "I.. Well, I mentioned it to Jim once but I don't think he really wanted to know. The first time either of us met him was when he took command of the Enterprise, after Pike. All of us, especially Spock, admired Pike so much. Having Captain Kirk walk onto the bridge was... uncomfortable, I think is the best word. At first. That went away fast though."

[leftwithmybones]

McCoy rubs his hands against his thighs slightly as he looks at Uhura, not sure he wants to tell her about anything else, but after she talks about respecting and admiring Pike, he feels he has to. "Did Jim tell you what happened in our world? How he earned his command?"

[fear_no_words]

She stilled, a nearly imperceptible thing given that she hadn't been moving to begin with. "I saw," she said quietly. She hadn't liked it, but she found that, once she had sat down, she couldn't leave Jim's side as that movie reel played. "I watched with Jim, what happened."

[leftwithmybones]

"He's going to be fine if he follows my damn orders," he says, trying to give her a positive side and spin to it. "The slug did a good bit of damage, but with the right rehabilitative treatment, there's a chance that wheelchair isn't going to be permanent," he says. It's only been three months when he ended up here on his ass and so he can't exactly check in, but -- and call him crazy -- he's going to be optimistic about this.

[fear_no_words]

She couldn't figure which 'him' the doctor was referring to for a moment, Captain Pike's fate so blissfully unlike his future in Uhura's reality that he had stayed least in her memory. A smile flashed across her face, but small and fragile and strengthened only by a story of another reality, it disappeared quickly.

"That's not what happened to him in my world," she said. "It's... I'm happy it turned out so well for that him."

[leftwithmybones]

"Don't know if it will yet," he clarifies, mild and realistic, but he'd rather err on the side of caution than get too optimistic. "Jim and Spock got him back to me in time that I could operate," he does guarantee. "Took a long time, but I caught all the damage the slug did."

[fear_no_words]

She opened her mouth, but shook her head and looked away. He didn't understand what she was saying, which was frustrating if only because it required her to say it again and more clearly. "Even if he never walks again... In my world, there was an accident. He suffered severe delta ray radiation. He was.. scarred practically beyond recognition, couldn't walk, couldn't speak."

His life on Talos IV was better than what he had before, but even so it was only an illusion. A very nice pretend, but only pretend. A man like that deserved a real life. "Walking or not, your Pike is lucky."

[leftwithmybones]

"Suppose he is," McCoy agrees, because if Uhura is saying that, he's going to do the smart thing and believe her. He doesn't think she's the type to exaggerate and so McCoy affords a small spot of sympathy for that Captain Pike and, not for the first time, starts to wonder. "...how much did you know about me in your world, Uhura?"

[fear_no_words]

"Hmmm," Uhura noised thoughtfully. "Well, you've been friends with the Captain for what seems like forever. You and Spock got along just as well as you do now. You're from Mississippi, divorced. ..Why? Are you afraid I know too much, doctor?" she asked with a teasing smirk.