Clearly my throat, I stare over the rims of my glasses at the woman sprawled on the sofa. "Do you mind?"
People fall asleep in all sorts of weird places all the time. Or at least that's what I've noticed during my time here. It results in sunburn and unfortunate fabric burns and things like that.
"I do mind, actually," Emma says, sitting up quickly as she looks at the girl. It's not to give the child the satisfaction of acquiescing; she simply doesn't intend to deal with whatever this while stretched out on some ghastly couch that may or may not be older than she is. She minds a great deal. She minds not having noticed the girl as she approached, she minds the realization that there are others, she minds the distance at which she feels their presence. Everything seems suddenly, painfully dull. "Would you mind telling me exactly what's going on here?"
She wants to reach out and take the information for herself, just to be able to do it, but there's nothing there - not even the absence of information, just the absence of the ability even to reach for it, jarring.
Oh lovely. I mean I don't exactly resent new people because I was once new here and stuck in nothing but paisley dresses for weeks on end.
This one seems to be suitably surly about it though. Which makes sense, especially given that I wasn't exactly all sunshine and roses myself when I arrived.
"Today's your lucky day, because you're now stuck in a place with no magic, no powers, no seasonal changes and a questionable sense of history. Welcome."
Oh, fantastic, the child has a sense of humor. Emma hates that in a tour guide.
The part about no powers hits hard, even if she's already felt the truth of it. This, however, is no time to dwell on the problem. Of course, that's easier said than done.
"Yes, wonderful," she deadpans, "terribly welcome. I'm sure I'll be ready to sing 'Kumbaya' any moment now. I don't suppose you know how I got here?"
Apparently someone didn't have her coffee this morning. Unless I'm the lucky one and this arrival is always such a peach. If she is, then God help those who end up permanently stuck with her.
"The same way everyone else does: by not trying to get here. It's mathematically unreasonable for people to just arrive and yet we all do. So I'd start practicing your songs."
"I'm less interested in the math than an exit," Emma says. There can't be anything unreasonable in that, she's sure. "But you don't know where one is, do you?"
She can't imagine anyone would be here if they knew how not to be.
"That's what I'm saying." Staring at the woman, who definitely needs to think about wearing some clothes, I try my hardest to not roll my eyes in exasperation.
Clearly mutton dressed as lamb didn't get the hint. "There is no exit."
Emma stares blankly at the girl. "Yes, thank you, I understand." It isn't her fault the child doesn't believe in being clear enough Emma doesn't have to ask for clarification. "What is known about this place? Who runs it?"
The child's speaking another language, or may as well be, babbling in acronyms. Emma doubts she'd make sentence even if she bothered spelling things out. "Good for them," she says, only half-listening. "They all sound so efficient."
I'm not an idiot. I can tell when I'm being ignored and you know what? I don't care if miss "I dress like a low budget prostitute on my day off but other dress is a suit" listens to me.
It's her fault. "Efficient isn't a thing here. There's no crime in the first place."
"No wonder, then, that there's no exit," Emma says. They don't even have the attention span for proper governance here, so how on earth are they to find a way out? "I'm relatively certain being stuck here is a crime in its own right."
That doesn't sound quite right. Emma's not entirely fazed by the idea of dinosaurs, as such, but if nothing else, she imagines there have to be people stupid enough to get eaten by them. "Why isn't the place overrun with them then?"
"There's an electromagnetic fence that triggers a sound or something that keeps them on the far side of the island."
I haven't exactly had the time or the desire to pick apart McKay's brain for his tech but that doesn't keep me from sharing what I have heard around the proverbial watercooler.
Emma makes an appreciative noise as she nods. "Not bad for the middle of nowhere," she observes. She hadn't actually thought a place like this would be able to pull something like that off, mostly because she doesn't know where they'd get any kind of tech. "That's fairly clever."
People fall asleep in all sorts of weird places all the time. Or at least that's what I've noticed during my time here. It results in sunburn and unfortunate fabric burns and things like that.
"Cause you're kind of being a cushion hog."
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She wants to reach out and take the information for herself, just to be able to do it, but there's nothing there - not even the absence of information, just the absence of the ability even to reach for it, jarring.
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This one seems to be suitably surly about it though. Which makes sense, especially given that I wasn't exactly all sunshine and roses myself when I arrived.
"Today's your lucky day, because you're now stuck in a place with no magic, no powers, no seasonal changes and a questionable sense of history. Welcome."
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The part about no powers hits hard, even if she's already felt the truth of it. This, however, is no time to dwell on the problem. Of course, that's easier said than done.
"Yes, wonderful," she deadpans, "terribly welcome. I'm sure I'll be ready to sing 'Kumbaya' any moment now. I don't suppose you know how I got here?"
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"The same way everyone else does: by not trying to get here. It's mathematically unreasonable for people to just arrive and yet we all do. So I'd start practicing your songs."
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She can't imagine anyone would be here if they knew how not to be.
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Clearly mutton dressed as lamb didn't get the hint. "There is no exit."
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Which is to say not far enough to prevent all of the really weird things from happening.
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It's her fault. "Efficient isn't a thing here. There's no crime in the first place."
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"There are dinosaurs but that doesn't lead to any trouble either."
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I haven't exactly had the time or the desire to pick apart McKay's brain for his tech but that doesn't keep me from sharing what I have heard around the proverbial watercooler.
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