(Untitled)

[scientificsnark]

It had been exactly a month since the...weekend debacle, and everything seemed to be fine with Jill, which meant Rodney McKay didn't have an excuse to stay hidden in his hut for much longer. Avoiding Sheppard and everyone else seemed a little immature, and Rodney did not want such an unflattering adjective attached to his name

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[flyboy_shepp]

"Look what the cat dragged in," John announced from the doorway.

He knew Rodney had been hiding out, and part of him kind of respected his need to duck and cover, but the rest of him was upset he'd constantly been denied any opportunity to needle Rodney.

[scientificsnark]

"I don't mind cats," Rodney said through a mouthful of banana, without looking round. "Cats are very clean creatures. I like cats. And they usually leave things outside instead of dragging them in. My cat used to leave leaves on my doorstep; I don't think he ever got the hang of catching anything that was alive. What's with your sudden obsession with cats, anyway?"

The trouble with deflecting was that Rodney usually tried to start before anything had actually been thrown at him.

[flyboy_shepp]

Over the course of Rodney's babbling, John had managed to walk to the fridge, get some juice and was pouring himself a cup when the stream of chatter stopped.

"I was just a figure of speech," he replied, smirking down at the counter. "Relax."

[scientificsnark]

"Uh-huh." Rodney turned a little and eyed Sheppard suspiciously for a moment, but when nothing happened - such as Sheppard starting to hum the Wedding March, which was on par with his intellect in Rodney's opinion - he turned back and started in on his third banana.

[flyboy_shepp]

John turned and leaned against the counter, cup in hand as he tried not to watch Rodney scarf down a banana. "I mean, I was just commenting on how scarce you've been since you nearly got married."

[scientificsnark]

Rodney's shoulders hunched and he gritted his teeth, fist clenching on the end of the banana, the contents of which flopped sadly and squishily onto the surface of the table. He should have known Sheppard would strike just as his guard went down.

"That wasn't me," he said, refusing to look at him. "It was Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel possessing my body."

[flyboy_shepp]

John just grinned, entirely too pleased at Rodney's reaction.

"Looked like you," he shrugged, and took a long sip of his juice.

[scientificsnark]

"So did that teenage girl who seemed to think I have the perfect legs for short-shorts," Rodney said. He still hadn't forgotten that. Watching someone else in your body was even worse when it was someone else who was still going through puberty.

[flyboy_shepp]

John inhaled, then choked on a mouthful of liquid.

If there was anything he never wanted to remember ever again for as long as he lived, it was Rodney McKay in short shorts.

[scientificsnark]

Rodney smirked, satisfied that he'd shut Sheppard up, albeit temporarily. He wished he didn't have to do it in such a traumatizing way - for him as well as Sheppard - but he'd asked for it.

[flyboy_shepp]

When John got use of his lungs back, he fixed a glare on Rodney. "Thanks for that. I'm going to have nightmares for days."

[scientificsnark]

"You think I didn't? For weeks I was pursued in my dreams by a pair of giant hotpants with teeth," Rodney said. He was perfectly happy to keep talking about this particular horrifying topic, because at least they weren't talking about the more recent horror.

Sheppard was bound to come back to it eventually, he bet.

[flyboy_shepp]

"Alright, stop, I get it!" John waved a hand in front of him, as if that would do anything to stop Rodney talking, or the words reaching his ears.

[scientificsnark]

"You started it," Rodney pointed out, smirking. "At least I know what I'll be wearing to your wedding. How is Alice, by the way?" he asked nastily. "Did she turn into a demure, shy little mouse who doesn't threaten to kill people for no reason?"

[flyboy_shepp]

The thought of Alice being anything like that actually made John's eye twitch. "Uh, no. And if I ever get married," which was entirely unlikely, "I dare you to wear them."

[scientificsnark]

"You really want me in hotpants to be the thing you remember from your happy day?" Rodney asked with his eyebrows raised. "Well, okay. But don't say I didn't warn you."