(no subject)
"Masked Menaces!" the headline reads. "Costumed Caperers Could be Kinapping Your Children!!!" A picture of some poor slob dressed up in a frankly terribly Spidey costume takes up a good chunk of the page. The caption? "POISONOUS INFLUENCE: This man is clearly up to no good. Look at him."
In light of what had happened during those three days, I'd nearly forgotten about the fact that my reputation has apparently preceded me. I must've accidentally grabbed the article during my latest trip to the bookshelf. I don't generally go out of my way to read my bad press.
No, I just go out of my way to provide photographic evidence to help sell my bad press.
Jolly J. Jonah Jameson would be proud -- probably with less typos, sure, but proud nevertheless -- that his vendetta against me lives on without him. Reading the article now, though, I can't help but think my only consolation is that, picture aside, Spider-Man's not mentioned by name. The writer couldn't even spell his own name consistently. I can't even imagine what sort of new and exciting ways he would've messed up 'Spider-Man.' I mean, most people already forget the hyphen,* let alone the proper capitalization.
Yanno, I betcha Cap never runs into this problem.
Still, it just goes to show that it's the same story no matter where I go. Oh, I could wax philosophical on how nothing changes or how history repeats itself but the fact of the matter is, I'm as much a philosopher as I am a poet -- which is to say, not in the slightest. For all that I spent my days swinging by a thread and playing dress up, I've always been a scientist at heart.**
Which probably explains why I'm on the roof of the Compound surrounded by medical references and biology textbooks and not the collected works of Robert Frost. As for why I'm on the roof instead of in the rec room? Well, I guess I've just always had a thing for heights. It's not the Empire State Building, but it'll do. Glancing once again at the picture, it's with some morbid sense of satisfaction that I rip the paper clean in two. I'm about to leave it at that and go back to reading something legitimate when the wind picks up and sends the papers flying. Clambering forward, I'm half-dangling over the edge of the roof before I consider immediate retrieval a lost cause.
"Watch this place have litter laws.”
*Spider-Man and Doctor Octopus: Negative Exposure
**The Amazing Spider-Man #290
In light of what had happened during those three days, I'd nearly forgotten about the fact that my reputation has apparently preceded me. I must've accidentally grabbed the article during my latest trip to the bookshelf. I don't generally go out of my way to read my bad press.
No, I just go out of my way to provide photographic evidence to help sell my bad press.
Jolly J. Jonah Jameson would be proud -- probably with less typos, sure, but proud nevertheless -- that his vendetta against me lives on without him. Reading the article now, though, I can't help but think my only consolation is that, picture aside, Spider-Man's not mentioned by name. The writer couldn't even spell his own name consistently. I can't even imagine what sort of new and exciting ways he would've messed up 'Spider-Man.' I mean, most people already forget the hyphen,* let alone the proper capitalization.
Yanno, I betcha Cap never runs into this problem.
Still, it just goes to show that it's the same story no matter where I go. Oh, I could wax philosophical on how nothing changes or how history repeats itself but the fact of the matter is, I'm as much a philosopher as I am a poet -- which is to say, not in the slightest. For all that I spent my days swinging by a thread and playing dress up, I've always been a scientist at heart.**
Which probably explains why I'm on the roof of the Compound surrounded by medical references and biology textbooks and not the collected works of Robert Frost. As for why I'm on the roof instead of in the rec room? Well, I guess I've just always had a thing for heights. It's not the Empire State Building, but it'll do. Glancing once again at the picture, it's with some morbid sense of satisfaction that I rip the paper clean in two. I'm about to leave it at that and go back to reading something legitimate when the wind picks up and sends the papers flying. Clambering forward, I'm half-dangling over the edge of the roof before I consider immediate retrieval a lost cause.
"Watch this place have litter laws.”
*Spider-Man and Doctor Octopus: Negative Exposure
**The Amazing Spider-Man #290