No stranger to loss

[hnb_hustler]

Hunter hadn't seen Michael every day, or even weekly. They did their own things, they sometimes sat with each other at meals and sometimes not. Michael gave him his space while making sure Hunter knew he was always there if he needed him. He was old enough to take care of himself, but he had a family, as fractured and reassembled as the island had

Comments

[spd_green]

"More like forward," Bridge commented as he strolled down the beach, catching Hunter's comment on the wind. "Or maybe straight. With a little curve to the left."

[hnb_hustler]

Hunter groaned and turned. "Dude. That wouldn't be funny even if I was in a good mood."

[spd_green]

Bridge blinked once, twice, then his eyes lit up with a flare of understanding. He hadn't been trying to joke at all, so he didn't know what Hunter was talking about even before he could figure out what Hunter was talking about.

"I wasn't trying to be funny," he said solemnly. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were upset. Do you want to be alone?"

[hnb_hustler]

He should have known Bridge wasn't trying to be funny. It was Bridge, after all. "Whatever, it's not like it matters." It was ironic that he was even asking that.

[spd_green]

"But it does matter," Bridge pointed out, and mildly explained his thinking. "If you want to be alone, then me sitting down beside you would be something you don't want, and wouldn't help put you back in a good mood. But if you don't want to be alone, then me sitting down with you would help put you back into a good mood. And I don't want you to be unhappy."

[hnb_hustler]

"Yeah, well. It's a little too late to ask if I want to be alone." Of course, he didn't mean at the moment, and it occured to him quickly that he should probably clarify before Bridge went off again explaining why it may have been too late to prevent him from arriving but blah blah what the fuck ever. "My d--Michael's gone. He was someone I knew back home, and he's gone. And no one asked me if I fucking wanted him to go." He scowled and looked out at the water again, eyes wide to prevent the stupid fucking tears stinging his eyes, letting the ocean breeze dry them before they could escape.

[spd_green]

"They should have," Bridge said somberly before making the decision to sit down beside Hunter. He thought that being alone without a choice was worse than being with someone and not knowing what you wanted.

"I'm sorry he's gone," he said. "I've known some people here that have gone too, but no one that I knew from home. That must make it worse."

[hnb_hustler]

Hunter shrugged, not wanting sympathy but at the same time...kind of wanting it, after all. "It's not the first time for me." It was just the last of his connections to the home, the family and the life he'd started to build back in Pittsburgh, the life he'd half-lost coming here. The life he'd hoped to have again, or something like it. "Now it's just me. Ben, Michael, Brian...they're all gone now." And Roger had moved out, and Claire was long gone...all he really had left was Dairine.

"Whatever. It's not like I need anyone. I've been on my own for years."

[spd_green]

Bridge considered this and Hunter's situation, and ultimately had to agree with him. "You're right. I mean, you don't need anyone to help you breathe or eat or keep hydrated. You might need a doctor if you ever got sick or badly injured, but we still have lots of those. We don't have dentists though, so keep good care of your teeth."

He stopped his ramble before it really got started, because that wasn't actually the point he was trying to make and he knew it. "But it's been my experience that it's easier with other people."

[hnb_hustler]

Hunter stared at him for a minute. "...Dude." At least getting frustrated at Bridge was distracting him from his own stupid life. "Do you have to take everything so fucking literally?"

[spd_green]

"I just do," Bridge admitted, pulling his shoulders up in a meek shrug. "I'm working on it. But the last part wasn't literal. Friends really make life easier."

[hnb_hustler]

Hunter nodded and let it go. At least he was working on it. "Yeah, I guess. But I get so fucking sick of losing people, and that's all that ever happens here. You care about someone and then they...poof. Fuckin' disappear."

[spd_green]

"More stuff happens here," Bridge said. "There's still the parts where people aren't disappearing, when you're having fun and sharing meals and watching movies and swimming and just talking. That's good, isn't it?"

[hnb_hustler]

"Yeah. Until the people you do it with are just suddenly fuckin' gone one morning," Hunter growled. "It's stupid. Why even bother having friends here when they can just be gone all of the sudden?"

[spd_green]

"Because there's no point in living if you don't have friends," Bridge replied. "I mean, yes you breath and eat and live on a purely biological level without others. But how boring and empty and sad to be without them. Not just to lose them but to never have them ever." He shook his head, not liking the sound of that at all. "Besides, friends are a naturally renewable resource. You lose some, but you can still make more."

[hnb_hustler]

"Great. And then I can lose them, too," Hunter muttered. He just didn't see the fucking point, when it hurt this much to lose them, over and over. He was fine alone. He was better alone.