(no subject)
I wasn't paying all that much attention to anything but food when I went to the kitchen. It's funny the things you gat used to and miss. At SGC we had these handy trays. You'd pile all the food you wanted on them and carry it to your table. Here I had to carry my plate and silverware, set it down, then return for the rest. When I came back with my juice, right by my plate--which hadn't been there just a moment ago--was a very familiar box. It was mine, I'd have known it anywhere. The only time in my life I hadn't had it was while Qetesh was in control and while I was in the Ori galaxy. When I came back to SGC, it was under my bed, still.
I sat slowly and opened it and inside were all the things I'd never admit I held so dear. Even the most recent trinket Jacek had given me to curry my favor. I wanted to close it and go on about eating, but instead I found myself picking up piece after piece and remembering. Remembering when I got them. Remembering every time I hadn't traded them, even when I'd have certainly gotten the better end of the deal.
One ring I remembered quite clearly. Just a small thing. It didn't fit my finger anymore. My father had been gone for months and when he returned I had leapt into his arms. I'd been so angry at him, but as soon as he walked through the door all my anger simply evaporated. My mother wasn't so understanding. She had slapped him and sent me to my room. I'd listened to them fight for quite a while. Finally, after things were quiet, Jacek came into my room, kissed my forehead and called me sweetheart. He slipped the ring on my finger and sat with me until I fell asleep. In the morning when I woke up, he was gone. Again.
The worst part of having it here was that it made me happy. For all the memories I tried to forget and all the hatred I held for the man I called my father, these stupid, worthless, gaudy things still made me happy...and that was enough to close the lid with a bang and return to my breakfast. I could shove the box under my bed when I was done.
I sat slowly and opened it and inside were all the things I'd never admit I held so dear. Even the most recent trinket Jacek had given me to curry my favor. I wanted to close it and go on about eating, but instead I found myself picking up piece after piece and remembering. Remembering when I got them. Remembering every time I hadn't traded them, even when I'd have certainly gotten the better end of the deal.
One ring I remembered quite clearly. Just a small thing. It didn't fit my finger anymore. My father had been gone for months and when he returned I had leapt into his arms. I'd been so angry at him, but as soon as he walked through the door all my anger simply evaporated. My mother wasn't so understanding. She had slapped him and sent me to my room. I'd listened to them fight for quite a while. Finally, after things were quiet, Jacek came into my room, kissed my forehead and called me sweetheart. He slipped the ring on my finger and sat with me until I fell asleep. In the morning when I woke up, he was gone. Again.
The worst part of having it here was that it made me happy. For all the memories I tried to forget and all the hatred I held for the man I called my father, these stupid, worthless, gaudy things still made me happy...and that was enough to close the lid with a bang and return to my breakfast. I could shove the box under my bed when I was done.