And All The (Joey's) World's A Stage
Joey loved the stage more and more every lesson. Standing right in the middle, arms spread wide, taking his loyal minions under his wings and imbuing them with every. single. little. thread of acting talent that he possessed. That was the good part - the adoring looks he received (he chose to perceive them that way, anyhow), the rapturous applause at the end of every ninety minutes……..that he imagined in his head… The pride that radiated from him all day and night.
Joseph Tribbiani. University Professor. Him! A Professor! Take that, Ross and his 64567345235436534 on his SAT results. This just went to prove that you didn’t have to go to university…or finish high school…to be somebody.
The bad part? Eight lessons in and Joey was already quickly running out of things to teach. He’d used up his Smell The Fart Acting tips in his first week, taught his students how to get around having to learn their lines by writing on the props in the second, practised working with broomstick robots and moody actors in the third, ass-acting and tap-dancing in the fourth, accents in the fifth… That had been a particularly impressive lesson, even if he did think so himself. Now he was just finishing up teaching his pupils French before moving onto his new topic: Fruit Acting.
“So, disciples, in conclusion,” Joey clapped his hands together, weaving between his students, “abloom blah ble bleh blub pom nume.” He winked at a student, “floo flah flay!” and kept moving. “Now you’re all set for French auditions and guys, remember the ladies like a bit of the ol’ romantic lan-mama-guage-ay so use it on them too. You can thank me after you’ve got some.”
Hopping off the stage, Joey bound over to the pile of fruit sitting in the corner, making a beeline for the pineapple sitting there. Even he could guess who’d brought that to class. “Next lesson,” he called out, turning around and beckoning everyone to the edge of the stage to listen up. He held the fruit high above his head. “Fruit acting. This is really, really important, so you gotta pay attention; the number of times I’ve run through my lines opposite this prickly little buddy, phew, I’ll tell ya. We got half an hour left, let’s use it wisely! Grab your fruit, grab a partner, and make it up as you go along. All the best actors do that,” he waved a hand dismissively. “I mean, I do that, so…” Point made.
“Those of you who forgot your fruit, or uh, have sadly found that it somehow ran away,” he stepped in front of an orange rind and tried to subtly kick it off to the side. His stomach rumbled for some more; fruit never satisfied it. “Then you’ll be trying out some kissing scenes, ready for next lesson. Guys and girl, pair up and let’s do this thing, yeah!”
He pumped the air to infuse some excitement into his class and hoisted himself up onto the stage again. “Don’t mind me, I’ll come round to all of you, see what you’re working on. Remember, all this is going to really help when we put on our big awesome show at the end of term so I wanna see you all trying your hardest. And no-one leaves before I’ve seen you do your acting exercises to cool down at the end!”
Sometimes Joey even amazed himself.
[ooc: Acting class! :D Feel free to have had Joey teach your pups other outrageous lessons. Any and all tags are welcome, ST/LT are hearts. Post is open to all - tag Joey, tag each other - and especially pups who specifically signed up for acting classes. Those are: Cuthbert Allgood, Ariel, Bran Davies, Tony DiNozzo and Shawn Spencer. (Stephen Colbert too?) Joey and I would LOVE to see you there! Even if it’s just to wonder why the hell they took this class in the first place XD All other pups welcomed and encouraged! Rubber-neckers, people who want a laugh, hecklers… I’m sure popcorn can’t be too hard to find… :D Have some fun and enjoy!]