(Untitled)

[sir_samuel]

He'd found it when he had come into the rec room. An octagonal board covered in little checkered squares, populated with eight tiny trolls and thirty-two minuscule dwarfs, all set to fight their little imaginary battle. The pieces were carefully made, the small troll figures walking rocks with clan lichen painted on in minute detail, dwarfs bearded

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[rebellious_lady]

It isn't a game Marian has ever seen, but the pieces are all carefully crafted, making her think that it cannot be something someone on the island has simply made. "It is a game, is it not?" Marian settles with her tea across from Vimes. "I didn't picture you to be the game playing type."

[sir_samuel]

"It's called Thud," Vimes said grimly, not looking up from the board, still frowning at the pieces as if they would divulge some secret if he stared long enough. "And 'm not. S'problem is that no one actually cares about that, including the island."

He scowled. "It really shouldn't surprise me anymore."

[rebellious_lady]

"Likely not," Marian sipped at her tea, considering the board herself and having it make no sense to her whatsoever. "I think this place enjoys mocking us all, but some more than others."

[sir_samuel]

"You can say that again." Vimes looked ceilingward despairingly and sighed. "All right, all right. I get the damned picture, you can stop now," he announced to the powers that be, though he held no real hope that they would listen.

[rebellious_lady]

Marian fought hard to hide her smile. "Let me know if it works, please."

[sir_samuel]

"Mmph." Vimes glared at nothing in particular. "Don't get your hopes up."

[rebellious_lady]

"Believe me, I will not," marian did smile then, her cup of tea resting lightly on the edge of the table. "How is it played?"

[sir_samuel]

Vimes sighed and absently picked up one of the troll pieces. "The point is to capture as many of your opponents pieces as you can. But dwarfs and trolls are different, right? So the way you play depends on which side you choose."

He replaced the piece. "The trick is that you play both sides before you can win."

[rebellious_lady]

"Play both sides?" Marian asks with a hint of wonder in her voice. "How does one manage that?"

[sir_samuel]

"Two games," Vimes answered. "So you can't just think like a troll, and you can't just think like a dwarf. You have to think like both.

"I'm guessing it's someone's idea of being clever."

[rebellious_lady]

"Quite possibly. I cannot think it would be easy to try and think as both." Not that she was entirely sure what either a troll or a dwarf were. "Are they from different countries? Troll and dwarf? Like Saracens, and Englishmen?"

[sir_samuel]

"Er, not exactly." Whatever Saracens and Englishmen were. "They're different races, but you can find 'em all over the Disc. Trolls," he picked up a piece, "Trolls generally come from the mountains and generally look like the rocks they were born around. S'matter of fact, it can be damned hard to tell the difference. Dwarfs," he held up another piece, "are short and bearded, unless you're Carrot, and like to mine rocks."

"You can see where the problem comes in."

[rebellious_lady]

"They look like... Rocks?" Marian is stuck on this point, quite obviously.

[sir_samuel]

Vimes shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much." When you came from a flat world supported by four elephants that rode on the back of a turtle, walking rocks were nothing.

[rebellious_lady]

"Walking rocks are normal then? I assume these... Dwarf things do not get along with the rocks. Hence the game." It seemed bizarre, and part of her would have wondered if this were some joke were it not Vimes talking to her.

[sir_samuel]

"Only when they're trolls and not actually rocks." There was a difference, as much as troll physiology made you wonder sometimes. But anyone who had implied otherwise, or been with someone who implied otherwise, or heard of someone implying otherwise, definitely knew the difference.*

He snorted. "Nope, not at all. Since the beginning of time, more or less."

*Rocks couldn't pick you up and throw you across the room, for one.