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[milfweed]

The weather kept Nancy in the Compound most of the time these days. She wasn't really sure what to do with herself. Mostly, she read romance novels and made brownies (the normal sort) and kept the coffee brewing. She thought about asking someone to teach her to play the piano (she could remember very little from the year of lessons she took as a

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[wayward_dad]

John had been doing a hell of a lot of reading lately. Well, a hell of a lot of reading when he wasn't busy making really shitty coffee or hiding from everyone. He mostly did the latter, though in the past few days he had been more visible.

Two days ago the bookshelf had given him a copy of Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment. While he'd looked at the title and snorted derisively when it had, John had walked off with the book just the same. It took him a few hours off and on to read it. For a guy who studied Latin and all sorts of ancient cultural aspects as part of the job, it sure was hard to read a book shock full of long, unwieldy Russian names.

He'd ended up liking the book in the end, however, and headed into the rec room to return it. Wondering what the hell the bookshelf would give him today, John strolled into the rec room--

And promptly stopped.

There was a screen with a video of some sort playing. A video of a woman who looked exactly like Nancy and a man who looked exactly like him (when he was clean-shaven) obviously having sex.

The book dropped to the floor with a clatter while John just stared.

[milfweed]

Nancy heard the clatter of the book behind her, and she turned. Her hands, holding the coffee cup, were trembling, and coffee sloshed out and burned her skin slightly.

For a split second when she saw him, after looking at the movie - but no, it was John.

Her cheeks went pink, and behind her, she heard herself moan. John still seemed to be frozen, and she could imagine what he was seeing.

"I - I - " she stammered.

[wayward_dad]

Although she was standing right damned in front of him, John didn't see Nancy at first. He was so intent on staring at the screen that he couldn't focus on anything else. It felt like the walls were closing in around him, like he couldn't breathe. There was an uncomfortable twisting in his stomach; he shouldn't be watching this. That up there, that wasn't him, though it damned well looked like it -- when he took the time to shave. He did clean up well, though John knew that man wasn't him. It had to be an island trick of some kind, a trick of the cruelest damned sort.

Nancy's stammering broke into his thoughts. Wrenching his gaze away from the screen, John stared down at her, his head shaking almost imperceptibly.

[milfweed]

"I don't know how that got here," Nancy whispered. She could hardly look at him, not at those eyes, not right now.

From behind her, she heard Judah's voice rasping, "I love you."

She winced. "I should... try to turn it off..."

[wayward_dad]

In that exact moment, John understood what the hell was going on. It was some kind of film Nancy had made with her husband, her dead husband who looked like him. Anger roiled red-hot in John's veins just then, anger at how malicious and screwed up this island was.

"I'll do it," he said thickly, moving past her toward the projector.

[milfweed]

Nancy took a couple of steps forward so that she could set her coffee down on the table, afraid that she was going to drop it.

She leaned on the arm of the couch, looking back to the screen as John knelt by the projector.

...right, there were her breasts.

[wayward_dad]

It took him a few moments to do it, but John figured out how to turn off the projector. The sounds on the screen shifted into a warbled, drawn-out sting of noise until, mercifully, it and the images came to a halt.

Exhaling slowly, John inwardly counted to five, giving Nancy a little window in which to compose herself, before moving to face her again.

He didn't have to ask what the hell had just happened. John was a quick study; he got it.

Noticing the mug she'd set on the table, John motioned to it before pulling out a chair for her.

"Sit down, Nancy," he said quietly.

[milfweed]

Nancy shook her head, not refusing to sit (though she wasn't), but just in sheer disbelief at the whole situation.

"That," she said, gesturing sharply at the screen, "is fucked up is what that is." She sounded almost angry, but there was an edge of hysteria to her voice.

[wayward_dad]

John nodded shortly in agreement. No way in hell anyone could argue with that.

After tapping the back of the chair again, John leaned over to grab her cup. As he pressed it into her hands, John met her eyes with a steely gaze. "I'm guessing this is the first time the island's screwed around with you, huh?"

[milfweed]

Numbly, Nancy sank into the chair, gripping the cup hard since her hands still seemed to be trembling.

She wished he wouldn't look at her like that. It made her just want to climb onto his lap and...

She took a deep breath. "I thought nothing would surprise me after Halloween, but that wasn't... personal."

[wayward_dad]

"Maybe for you it wasn't," John said tersely, damned near his entire body stiffening at the memory of it all. Veronica on the ceiling, their hut burning, the Demon... It had been personal. Very personal.

Remembering himself, John pulled a chair out from the table and set it so it was directly opposite her. Their knees bumped slightly as he sat down, though if it bothered John in any way, it didn't show on his face. Leaning forward, his hands on top of his thighs, he took in every last bit of her features.

"You didn't deserve that."

[milfweed]

God, he was so intense. And the way he was looking at her, like he was memorizing her face, studying every inch of her... Did he even know what he was doing?

She forced a weak laugh. "I don't know, maybe I did. Maybe somehow he knows that the man i chose to share my bed after he died turned out to be a psychopath."

[wayward_dad]

"Your husband loved you, Nancy," John said evenly, unconsciously twisting his own wedding ring now. Even without having seen the video tape of Nancy and her husband together, John knew Judah had to have loved her. From the way Nancy had talked about him to John, to the look in her own eyes when she talked about it, it was blatantly obvious. "No matter what mistakes you make, you've gotta hold onto that." He'd made enough damned mistakes of his own. But even in his darkest hour, even when he was sure he'd disappointed Mary and let her down, John knew that she would have loved him no matter what.

[milfweed]

Nancy's eyes flicked to John's ring, then she looked back up at him. "That must have been... strange, for you, too. I'm sorry you had to, um."

[wayward_dad]

Wanting to deter her from further embarrassment, John met her gaze head-on, a wry smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "Don't apologize. You're not responsible for what just happened." Having stopped the fidgeting with his ring, John splayed his fingers out atop the curve of his knees.

Imagining how he would feel if the island brought him a very sudden and personal reminder of Mary like that, he tilted his head as he regarded her. "How are you holding up?"

[milfweed]

"Um... okay, I guess." Nancy shook her head. "The last time I saw that tape... I don't know, a couple of months before I showed up here. I was having a hard time, I thought it might make me feel better to see him, but... I just ended up in the floor of my bedroom in my bathrobe crying like a baby."