(no subject)
Sometimes meditation did very little for a pained soul.
Qui-Gon sat on his preferred stone near the edge of the garden, though the familiarity of it brought him little comfort just now. His eyes were open again, after an hour or so of failed attempts with the usual remedies the coda gave for deep loss, and he had unwrapped Obi-Wan's braid from around his wrist, his fingers stroking over the strands of it in the dark. Since waking from a particularly lengthy sleep and finally achieving a better balance with rest, nourishment and cleanliness, he had done his best to throw himself back into the only work available. Even so, one could only patrol the same stretch of land so many times per day without feeling utterly ridiculous.
Perhaps he would recover better if he spent less time thinking, truly. But that was the great unpleasantness of this place, he supposed--that there was nothing else to do but think, and regret, and rethink all over again. Jedi should not dwell on the past. It was unchangeable, forever set, and the future changed with every moment, waking or dreaming.
Regretting something so deeply, longing so badly to alter what could not be changed...it was a failing indeed.
Qui-Gon sat on his preferred stone near the edge of the garden, though the familiarity of it brought him little comfort just now. His eyes were open again, after an hour or so of failed attempts with the usual remedies the coda gave for deep loss, and he had unwrapped Obi-Wan's braid from around his wrist, his fingers stroking over the strands of it in the dark. Since waking from a particularly lengthy sleep and finally achieving a better balance with rest, nourishment and cleanliness, he had done his best to throw himself back into the only work available. Even so, one could only patrol the same stretch of land so many times per day without feeling utterly ridiculous.
Perhaps he would recover better if he spent less time thinking, truly. But that was the great unpleasantness of this place, he supposed--that there was nothing else to do but think, and regret, and rethink all over again. Jedi should not dwell on the past. It was unchangeable, forever set, and the future changed with every moment, waking or dreaming.
Regretting something so deeply, longing so badly to alter what could not be changed...it was a failing indeed.