Coming and Going

[the_7th_guest]

So it sucks how some people just come in and out of your life, and some that you think are the most important really are not in the scheme of things, and some that may not seem as important to you really are probably the best thing for you. I have had many people whom I have called friends come and go, and it's just a fact of life. It's painful when it happens for me in most cases if not all cases because sometimes I feel like things are out of my control, but then as time goes by I realize that it's for the best. That those people really weren't good for me in the long run. It's hard to miss people and sometimes people come back and sometimes they don't. Sometimes you just have to cut all ties and sometimes there's always that little opening where you leave things off to where there's always that chance where they may come back someday. It's then where you have to figure out if it is worth the pain and aggravation, whether or not things will be the same or if things will have changed. I recently broke such a tie with a friend that I had known for over a year. I had feelings for this person that they didn't have for me and I tried to stay friends and it just wasn't going to happen. There were other circumstances involved as well, but in my heart of hearts I knew that it just wasn't going to work out and that I would just have to break all ties to this person eventually. I had even tried, but there was that little opening that allowed me to stay in that person's life and for a while it was okay. But I knew that eventually I just couldn't handle things the way they were and things would eventually take the course they did. This time it was mostly their decision, and I think when that happens it makes me feel worse because then it feels like it is out of my hands and that makes it hurt more somehow. I miss this person everyday, and it's very hard not to pick up the phone and call them or email them and talk about every day mundane things that we used to talk about and share with each other.
What's funny, is that just around the same time I was ending one such friendship, an old friend resurfaced who I haven't heard from in a little over a year and have missed a lot, and we are talking again. Like I said, people come and people go. I guess it's ultimately the decisions we make that shape how things turn out within our relationships.