A "House of Wax" theory
First of all...today is May 10, which means it's the day we've all been waiting for...ALONE IN THE DARK COMES OUT ON DVD TODAY!!!!!! Pick up two copies, so you can lend one out to friends and show them what a film is supposed to be like.
Anyways, saw "House of Wax" last night. And I actually enjoyed it, because it was ridiculous and gory, and most of all, erotic. But I was, how shall we say, "to' up" after a visit to the docks, so I was quite analytical, so I started thinking about this last night and have since continued it, because I think it's one of those things that not too many people would consider about the film.
During a key scene in the movie, the local psychopath is abducting Elisha Cuthbert's character. He pulls her into his garage, and turns on the radio. Marilyn Manson starts playing; according to the soundtrack, it's the song "Dried Up, Tied and Dead to the World." End of story, right? Wrong.
Now, whatever town they were in was busted as fuck; to illustrate, their main attraction was a fucking House of Wax. And when the psychopath turns on the Manson, he does it on his old-ass radio. By the style of the radio, the only way this thing was playing music was either through radio (which I didn't consider until today, but more later) or tape.
But, let's consider. After more research, it turns out that "Dried Up..." is on Manson's 1996 album "Antichrist Superstar." Think about the advances in technology we've made in the past ten years: pre-recorded cassettes were slowly fazed out to make way for both CDs and MP3s. Now, how did this psycho find a copy of "Antichrist Superstar?," especially on a pre-recorded cassette? According to the press kit (that came in the mail today for the Beacon, sweet), the film takes place in the fictional town of Ambrose, which is located in the murky bayou of rural Louisiana.
What kind of respectable record store is going to be in East Buttfuck, Louisiana? You're not going to find the equivalent of a Newbury Comics or a Best Buy down there. The best you're going to get is a Wal-Mart, and it would be highly unlikely that such a family-oriented, right-wing store would dare to sell anything by Marilyn Manson, even if edited, and especially because it's called "Antichrist Superstar," and Wal-Mart hearts JC.
But let's just say that the psycho did find "Antichrist Superstar;" the only way he'd do it would be on CD, most likely. So now, he must have the following: a CD player and a blank cassette tape to put "Antichrist Superstar" on. He would then have to deliberately take time out of his day in order to transfer the music from the CD to the tape. Of course, if you've seen the movie, you realize he doesn't have much to do in town unless a group of stranded, sexy teenagers rolls through, but regardless...
SPOILER ALERT - if you care to see the movie, stop reading, but chances are I am actually the only person who had any interest in seeing the movie, so fuck it, keep reading...So basically the psycho takes people and encases them in wax because of something to do with his mother, but forget the why, accept it and move on...so he's been creating this wax town or something for years after his mother died and lived a sequestered life with his deformed brother (again, don't ask questions). So where the fuck did this guy hear of Marilyn Manson?!? The motherfucker certainly didn't have MTV or anything like that, which leads to...
Option B, which is that he heard the song on the radio. Nate brought up the interesting point that their cell phones work in these shit ass towns, which we all know is bullshit. So if they can't get cell-phone service, where is the radio signal going to be from? Okay, they might get one AM station if they're lucky, but again, let's consider the potential audience in the backwoods of Louisiana... they are not the angsty little 16-year-olds who dye their hair black and wear black in a vain attempt to be "different", the ones who cry for help from their "tortured" life of having to go to high school and having mommy and daddy pay for their hatchbacks by slicing their wrists (across, of course). The type of people who would listen to the radio in buttfuck Louisiana are ones whose main ambition in life is to finish a six-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon before they violently fuck (and consequently impregnate; the word "condom" isn't in the vocabulary) their sisters. They are not going to want to hear some pasty white motherfucker singing hymns of hatred to his Lord and Saviour Satan.
So let's assume there is one radio station, WQPS, that still broadcasts to this area. QPS isn't goign to be playing today's alternative hits; they'd want to appease their audience with a constant stream of Johnny Cash and Patsy Cline, possibly injecting some new blood with the occasional Garth Brooks or Kenny Chesney. Besides, wouldn't it have been creepier if, instead of your standard goth-rock track, this torture occured to something older...something sort of peppy, like "A Boy Named Sue." It'd be much more effective if a psycho could get himself pumped to some upbeat country track, instead of the clash and bang of hard rock.
So, all I'm saying is that it's damn near impossible for this guy to be listening to Marilyn Manson. Let this also be a cry for help from me to anyone who might read this; do you realize that I've had time to give such a retarded subject serious thought. This is practically a graduate thesis, all based upon the fact that some d-bag at Warner Bros. thought their soundtrack might push a couple more copies with some Manson attached (although I'm farther impressed by the fact that both the Stooges and Joy Division are mixed in with the My Chemical Romances and the Disturbeds of the world). So please, just talk to me...call me, IM me, just save me from my life of sitting around considering the most asinine parts of slasher films. Because I could probably do this forever...
Anyways, saw "House of Wax" last night. And I actually enjoyed it, because it was ridiculous and gory, and most of all, erotic. But I was, how shall we say, "to' up" after a visit to the docks, so I was quite analytical, so I started thinking about this last night and have since continued it, because I think it's one of those things that not too many people would consider about the film.
During a key scene in the movie, the local psychopath is abducting Elisha Cuthbert's character. He pulls her into his garage, and turns on the radio. Marilyn Manson starts playing; according to the soundtrack, it's the song "Dried Up, Tied and Dead to the World." End of story, right? Wrong.
Now, whatever town they were in was busted as fuck; to illustrate, their main attraction was a fucking House of Wax. And when the psychopath turns on the Manson, he does it on his old-ass radio. By the style of the radio, the only way this thing was playing music was either through radio (which I didn't consider until today, but more later) or tape.
But, let's consider. After more research, it turns out that "Dried Up..." is on Manson's 1996 album "Antichrist Superstar." Think about the advances in technology we've made in the past ten years: pre-recorded cassettes were slowly fazed out to make way for both CDs and MP3s. Now, how did this psycho find a copy of "Antichrist Superstar?," especially on a pre-recorded cassette? According to the press kit (that came in the mail today for the Beacon, sweet), the film takes place in the fictional town of Ambrose, which is located in the murky bayou of rural Louisiana.
What kind of respectable record store is going to be in East Buttfuck, Louisiana? You're not going to find the equivalent of a Newbury Comics or a Best Buy down there. The best you're going to get is a Wal-Mart, and it would be highly unlikely that such a family-oriented, right-wing store would dare to sell anything by Marilyn Manson, even if edited, and especially because it's called "Antichrist Superstar," and Wal-Mart hearts JC.
But let's just say that the psycho did find "Antichrist Superstar;" the only way he'd do it would be on CD, most likely. So now, he must have the following: a CD player and a blank cassette tape to put "Antichrist Superstar" on. He would then have to deliberately take time out of his day in order to transfer the music from the CD to the tape. Of course, if you've seen the movie, you realize he doesn't have much to do in town unless a group of stranded, sexy teenagers rolls through, but regardless...
SPOILER ALERT - if you care to see the movie, stop reading, but chances are I am actually the only person who had any interest in seeing the movie, so fuck it, keep reading...So basically the psycho takes people and encases them in wax because of something to do with his mother, but forget the why, accept it and move on...so he's been creating this wax town or something for years after his mother died and lived a sequestered life with his deformed brother (again, don't ask questions). So where the fuck did this guy hear of Marilyn Manson?!? The motherfucker certainly didn't have MTV or anything like that, which leads to...
Option B, which is that he heard the song on the radio. Nate brought up the interesting point that their cell phones work in these shit ass towns, which we all know is bullshit. So if they can't get cell-phone service, where is the radio signal going to be from? Okay, they might get one AM station if they're lucky, but again, let's consider the potential audience in the backwoods of Louisiana... they are not the angsty little 16-year-olds who dye their hair black and wear black in a vain attempt to be "different", the ones who cry for help from their "tortured" life of having to go to high school and having mommy and daddy pay for their hatchbacks by slicing their wrists (across, of course). The type of people who would listen to the radio in buttfuck Louisiana are ones whose main ambition in life is to finish a six-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon before they violently fuck (and consequently impregnate; the word "condom" isn't in the vocabulary) their sisters. They are not going to want to hear some pasty white motherfucker singing hymns of hatred to his Lord and Saviour Satan.
So let's assume there is one radio station, WQPS, that still broadcasts to this area. QPS isn't goign to be playing today's alternative hits; they'd want to appease their audience with a constant stream of Johnny Cash and Patsy Cline, possibly injecting some new blood with the occasional Garth Brooks or Kenny Chesney. Besides, wouldn't it have been creepier if, instead of your standard goth-rock track, this torture occured to something older...something sort of peppy, like "A Boy Named Sue." It'd be much more effective if a psycho could get himself pumped to some upbeat country track, instead of the clash and bang of hard rock.
So, all I'm saying is that it's damn near impossible for this guy to be listening to Marilyn Manson. Let this also be a cry for help from me to anyone who might read this; do you realize that I've had time to give such a retarded subject serious thought. This is practically a graduate thesis, all based upon the fact that some d-bag at Warner Bros. thought their soundtrack might push a couple more copies with some Manson attached (although I'm farther impressed by the fact that both the Stooges and Joy Division are mixed in with the My Chemical Romances and the Disturbeds of the world). So please, just talk to me...call me, IM me, just save me from my life of sitting around considering the most asinine parts of slasher films. Because I could probably do this forever...