Perpetual Performances
We're all actors. We have been since we were kids. Let me explain: You were only truly you when you where in the early stages of Middle School. Maybe even before then. After a certain point in our lives, we learn what’s socially accepted. We learn what to do and what not to do. We're laughed at, made fun of, and do our share of mocking as well. Eventually we start building up these masks. Slowly, but surely, I think we all start acting to not only please others, but satisfy how we want to be perceived as well. We get better and better at acting as we grow. When you see someone now in high school, you’re not seeing them for who they truly are. Get to know people. Truly do. Only when we acknowledge that our actions, thoughts, outward feelings, and words cover up who we are, can we set apart what’s us from what we’ve built ourselves up to be. I find myself saying things to people that I know aren’t me. Ill mentally disassociate myself from my body and watch in third person as some fake conversation unfolds before my eyes. I’m disgusted at what I say or at what other say. It’s because I know it’s not me. Its not you either. We’ve become so good at acting that I think we’ve lost our true identities. The two have blended together. Well I’m tired of this shit. I’m tired of not even feeling like I’m in control anymore. I’m tired of watching my life unfold without a real grip on the reigns. Sometimes I just want to scream, pound on the walls that I’ve built up and just break them down. I’ll tell you what... I’ll be real with you if you’ll be real with me. Because you know what?
... I’m tired of acing.
... I’m tired of acing.