Mar 24, 2013 01:44
It's so painful to watch the first season.
1) Buffy's incredibly whiny, has no sense of responsibility, and is painfully selfish. She kinda makes me want to punch my computer screen. But it really just makes me appreciate how well developed she becomes and her self sacrificing attitude towards the latter end of the series.
2) And then there's Willow, who makes me die on the inside because I can't help but be upset that she still hasn't found her self confidence and still pines after Xander while he goes after Buffy and she still believes she's a powerless nothing and just awww, bb, why do you think so low of yourself? At the same time, I can't help but compare her to Season Four!Willow who is so much more confident and self loving, but at the same time is much more scarred.
3) I feel really bad for sort of hating Cordelia because I know she has to do a lot of growing up throughout Buffy and Angel and takes it better and a lot faster than I think anyone else in the Buffy universe. But on the other I'm not excited for the painful Chordy feels that seem to hit me really hard after watching Angel, so I don't want her to grow up, if that makes any sense.
4) Everything is Giles and everything hurts. I mean, with the knowledge I have of everything he went through in the past and the crap he put up with in the first season pains my soul. I think The Witch was the worst for me because after Ehygon, he was still willing to use magic that physically pained him. But the important part here is that he wasn't even emotionally attached to Buffy yet. If anything, she was a source of frustration in not being willing to take on her duty. She was just a responsibility at this point in time, but he was still willing to open up a can of psychological and physical pain for jut anyone because he's Giles and that's just how he rolls. And then he got no recognition for it, from anyone. Buffy took the credit and he let her. Which, again, makes me want to punch her in the face.
Also, Angel amuses me because I have this little headcanon that he's only ridiculously cryptic to impress Buffy and that he even plans out exactly what he's going to say and what he's going to wear a week before he visits her. In my headcanon he even stays up wishing he had a reflection so he could practice his facial expressions in a mirror. Because truth be told, if Angel the series taught us anything it's that even vampires can be complete dorks.
Alright, I'm done with the analysis. I shall carry on with the rewatch, no matter how much it pains me!
btvs,
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