Mar 14, 2006 15:29
Spring break is over. It was warm and sunny in Florida and it is cold and snowy in Michigan. Go figure. I almost forgot how gray it is here, how it looks like a bomb exploded and killed everything; only skeletons remain. The birds are coming back so I wake up to them singing and that makes everything all right.
I read the book Middlesex (Jeffrey Eugenides) and had serious gender-identity wonders about myself. (brain says "do you want to put this on the internet where everyone can see it?") Am I a man in a woman's body? Kind of a weird thought, one I've had before, but never considered more than a passing bit of embarassment and repression. Is there something more to me being a tomboy? To the fact that I wear bras only when there's no possible way I can get out of it? Do I only like boys because I'm afraid to like girls? There's a good possibility this is only a fleeting thought - like watching the Matrix and wondering if reality is all it seems. I guess it's a challenge to everybody to examine how much their sexuality is determined by society and how much they would change if there wasn't anyone around to condemn them.