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[thatsnotaknife]

[There's a low, pleased sounding hum over the phone line one morning. Then a chuckle. Australia is obviously amused by something and then he starts to sing:]

Once a jolly swagman camped by the billabong,
Under the shade of a Coolibah tree,
And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boiled,
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me!

[He

Comments

[wybrows]

I told ya not to sing in public--oh, ya finally got your ear back?

But don't sing in public.

[thatsnotaknife]

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda,
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me,
And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boiled
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me!

[wybrows]

I hope Sam bites your ear off!

[thatsnotaknife]

Oh, come on! Take a chill pill, sweetheart. You're named after one of the best songs ever, be proud! Sing along! Now!

[wybrows]

I'd rather sing Nothing Succeeds like Succession. It's a much better, well-respected song.

[thatsnotaknife]

How's it go?

[wybrows]

Principality of Wy secret. See, Oz, when you're a recognised nation, ya gotta keep yourself mysterious.

[thatsnotaknife]

Not your songs and culture, sweetie, you're supposed to advertise those. For tourism and stuff, you know?

[wybrows]

But if people don't know 'bout it, they'll want to come check it out. You're not very good at this.

[thatsnotaknife]

If people don't know 'bout it, they won't know to go check it out.

[wybrows]

... So you start tellin' people 'bout me, then they'll see for themselves. [ Laziness yes. ]

[thatsnotaknife]

... I'll tell them to go visit ya and stuff if you sing one whole verse of Waltzing Matilda.

[wybrows]

But I don't wanna. Who needs ya anyway? Everyone likes me better than you already.

[thatsnotaknife]

They can't when they don't know you exist, love.

[wybrows]

They... they must've seen my website, right?

[thatsnotaknife]

The internet is a big place, chicky babe! Can't be sure.