Room 505, Monday after 4th Period
Francine unlocked the door to her room after class and let out a "Katchoo?" that she couldn't quite keep from sounding hopeful, even though if Katchoo was here, they'd have to find another place to talk. There was nothing, though, and the other bed was still as empty as it had been when they moved to the cabins. ...Of people. Not of crap. It was Katchoo's bed.
"No Katchoo," she said quietly, beckoning Merlin in and dropping her books on her desk.
"She might be running late," Merlin suggested, looking at the other bed nervously.
"I guess." Francine eyed it as well, as she sat down on her own. Then it was Merlin she was eying.
Merlin looked away quickly. "I'm sure she'll be back soon."
"Yeah." Ooh, look at her very interesting (and slightly sunburned thanks to sitting out in the anywhere but the house, which some people called a yard) knees. Aaaaaaand then up. "I--" No, because that would go off into her and.... just no.
"Can I help?" Smoooth, Merlin. Smoooth. "I mean--with anything?"
The right answer was 'you are, just by being here' and it was true, not just right, but it wasn't, too. Nothing could be easy. Everything had to be weird and messed up. She couldn't come back and find that things at least made sense in Fandom.
It was a testament to just how weird and messed up things were, yes, that she could even think the words sense in Fandom. "You can..." You can tell me what the hell Dinah meant last night. Except she didn't want to get Dinah in trouble, not when she didn't even know what it was.
So she cheated. "Was there the something you wanted to talk to me about?"
"Oh!" That was sooo not going to happen now. She was already clearly upset and this would only make things worse.
Merlin took a careful seat on Katchoo's bed, pausing to see if she would burst out of the closet to murder him for doing so. Nothing so far, so he may be safe. For now. "I--"
Words, Merlin. Words were good.
"--I think our books came to life that one weekend," he blurted out.
"..." That was so not what Francine was expecting, not that she knew what she was supposed to be expecting but that wasn't it, that she mentally paid Arthur a quarter and said, "What?"
"Books," he repeated helplessly. "They were laying on my bed. With a bag."
Oh god, the bag.
"Our books," she repeated slowly. "Which books?"
"The---book." You know... "And my magic book."
"And you think they--" Oh. That weekend. "Because they were on the bed?"
"With a bag." Please don't ask about the bag.
Francine was both curious despite herself and getting a leeettle bit frustrated. "So what was in the bag?"
"It was from that store in town." Awkwaaaard. "The one with the books like you bought."
Get to the point, Merlin.
"There were... things in it. They buzzed."
Blink. Blink. "It was a bag of bees?"
Merlin stared at her for a long moment. "What?"
"You said it buzzed!" Go Francine with the pointing and the blowing hair out of your face. Way to be unflustered.
"They were shaped liked..." He waved toward his crotch. "You know."
Oh, Francine might as well just sign over her allowance to Arthur now, get it over with. "WHAT?"
(Look, it could be so much worse. She could have said IT WAS A BAG OF BEES SHAPED LIKE PENISES??)
"I don't know! It was just there!" Flail like the wind, Merlin. Flail! "I put it all in the closet."
That would require someone more genre-savvy than Francine to laugh at it. Or just.... savvy. Francine just stared. "And you didn't buy it? Them?" Pause. "They buzzed??" It kind of bore repeating.
Merlin sputtered and looked at her like she grew a second head. "Of course not! They were just there!"
"With the books. On the bed." She just wanted to make sure she had this straight, so when she yelled about it in 25 seconds, she would know what she was yelling about.
"Yes."
"THAT'S what you wanted to talk to me about? Our books buying SEX TOYS?" Funny how when the stress meter went up, the awkward babble around sex stuff fell away (though not the blushing). That's what she'd been worrying about all night in addition to everything else she'd been worrying about all night?
She was conveniently forgetting the part where he hadn't said he wanted to talk to her about anything at all. Out loud.
"I--um--" This was going very, very badly. "--hadn't actually gotten to that part."
He was wondering if now would be a good time to flee.
Deep, deep breath. "Oh." She started to apologize for yelling, realized this meant she hadn't been worrying about sex toys which on the whole would have been a bit of a relief to be worrying about, and decided the apology would just distract him from spitting it the heck out so she could hopefully stop worrying about whatever it was that wasn't sex toys. "Then what is that part?"
Merlin was almost certain that he would not make it out of the room alive. But he bravely soldiered on with what needed to be talked about. Hopefully.
"I--we should wait until you've spoken to Katchoo about home." Or not. He was a coward.
Oh for... Francine's eyes narrowed. "Why?"
"It involves her and--you're upset and won't talk to me about it." There. It was a bit of the truth.
Francine clapped her hand to her forehead. "Yes. I'm upset," she said slowly. Carefully. Like she had a mouth full of TNT and it might go off at him any second now. "But it's not about you. It's just.... I can't right now. But I'll tell you later."
"You don't have to," Merlin replied, rubbing his face. "I just don't want to talk to you about this when you're already upset about something."
Slow. Slow. One word at a time. "I want to. I will." Hell, she wanted to tell him now and fall all over him, but it just... "I'm not gonna be any less upset about it any time soon. Worrying about something else isn't helping, Merlin. Just tell me."
"I don't want to upset you at all!" He insisted, taking a deep breath. "I--we--we need to talk about what's going on with Arthur and Katchoo."
Finally all blurted out.
Okay, look, you can't copyright a stare so she wasn't paying anybody any damn thing. "THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON WITH ARTHUR AND KATCHOO? SHE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE BOYS!"
Way to keep the volume down so people on the second floor can't hear you, Francie.
Merlin stared again. Because, really? Really?
"What?"
"You said! With Arthur and Katchoo! Why wouldn't she tell me something like that?" Francine stood up and paced over to Katchoo's bed, arms doing things that might end in more accidental broken parts if people weren't very careful. "Wait, why am I even asking that. Since when does she tell me anything these days? She didn't tell me when she was a boy, she didn't tell me she's gay--" Don't let Katchoo specifically disowning that label get in the way of a good rant, Francine. "She hasn't even told me where she is. Why would she tell me this?"
You should probably stop her before she gets to the part where Katchoo will probably forget to invite her to the wedding, too, Merlin. Catch her while she's still somewhat rational.
Blink blink blink. "Francine?"
"What??"
"I meant them and us." Okay, the mental image of Arthur and Katchoo together was terrifying on so, so many levels.
Terrifying and cute. Though Francine was possibly not the best judge of character when it came to adorably vicious children who looked and acted like Katchoo with Arthur's ego. She was also, underneath the explicable and inexplicable hurt, already moving to at least it's Arthur when Merlin interrupted her, which... basically said something else about how screwy their lives really were.
"Them and us?" she repeated slowly, tottering on the edge of nearing actual comprehension.
"Yes," Merlin replied, calm as he could. "We need to figure this out before--before someone is hurt."
Maybe in fact it wasn't the best time to have this conversation, since the half of it she almost understood made Francine's stomach clench in a way it wouldn't have a week ago. But that wouldn't change in a month or a year or, to be honest, the rest of her life, so unless Merlin counted time-travel among his spells, it was too late for there to be a best time.
The other half just kept the non-copyrighted stare on her face.
"What," she said, even more slowly, as slowly as she wanted him to explain himself, "are you talking about?"
Which was why he had tried to put this off, damn it.
"We both know what I'm talking about," Merlin said, looking away. "Things are--complicated."
Suddenly standing up didn't seem like such a great idea to Francine's legs. Rather than topple over, she went for sitting down abruptly on Katchoo's bed. And possibly half of Katchoo's laundry. "Because you like Arthur?" she asked in a very small voice. You know, the one thing here she actually knew.
"Because I like Arthur, and he likes me, and Katchoo likes you, and you like her," he muttered, trying to think of a way to make this less horrible, really.
"I knew that, what, WHAT, WHAT????" Standing again was a brilliant idea. Really.
He was going to die, wasn't he? Oh, the possibilities of that were hiiigh.
"Um. Yes."
"Um yes, what? Are you crazy?" She hadn't missed the what that wasn't in all caps; that was the what that was eating at her gut, in fact. But the other two... "I TOLD you it's not like that with Katchoo and me!"
Merlin sighed. "She loves you Francine. And I--I don't think you would have kissed her if you hadn't felt something like that in return."
Nope. Staring wasn't going to stop any time this year. "Sure she loves me. And I love her. Because we're best friends! We've known each other since we were twelve. The kissing thing was a spell, remember?"
"Francine. I spoke with her about it before." That was not going to help at all.
"You..." Mouth. Open. Hands. Hips. "You. Talked to Katchoo. About. THAT?"
Merlin would have taken a step back had he not been sitting. Francine was rather frightening there. "I--the subject came up when the... thing with Chuck happened."
Okay, one hand off the hip, because she needed one for running through her hair. And catching it in the tangles she put there the last time. "Why? What the heck does Chuck have to do with it?"
"They beat him up for you." A beat. "Didn't you know that?"
Both hands. Air. Possibly conducting the New York Philharmonic. "They did WHAT??"
"I thought you knew!"
"Chuck looked fine when I saw him!"
Merlin huffed in annoyance at that. "Because someone healed him that weekend. He didn't deserve that sort of help."
Francine shook her head in confusion that was rapidly moving towards explosion. "They beat him up. And then you... decided to go talk to Katchoo about how you think.... I don't even know what you're thinking anymore!" And if she didn't know what she thought either, well.... shut up. Your face.
"Francine, calm down. Please." Yeah, like that would help.
Merlin stood up, hands out as if to calm her. "It's not like that. The topic just... came up."
"Just came up. And she told you that... THAT?" This wasn't a badgerface. It was a whole new level of creature. Possibly a zombie were-badger.
"Well. Um." Dig the hole deeper, Merlin! We know you can! "I thought it was rather obvious how you two feel."
"................YOU said that to HER?" Zombie vampire were-badger. "So not only does nobody ever TELL me anything, you think you know how I feel BETTER THAN I DO?"
Yes, Merlin might have been edging away from her wrath now. "I just thought--"
"You just thought WHAT? And.... what do you even ...." Words, Francine. Words. Saliva is nice for weather effects but doesn't really convey all the proper nuances of expression. "Arrrgh! Are you just saying this because you don't want to be with me?" Her voice was just loud enough to cover the sound of something cracking inside her at that thought. "Because you could just SAY that and...." Get it over with. Instead of making up things that weren't true.
At all.
"I didn't say that," Merlin attempted very desperately to interject.
"Then what the hell ARE you saying?"
Well... Crap. "I don't know."
It was ball up her fists and hit him, ball up her fists and hit the wall, or just plain bawl, and she didn't like any of those options. "Well, let me know when you do!" She took a step toward him, then shook her head and turned away, stalking over to the desk to grab her purse. "If you figure out what I want, give me a call too. I THOUGHT it was you, but apparently I'm the last to know everything around here!"
Room 505 had a very good door for slamming.
Merlin stared at the door for a very long moment, not certain if going after her was for the best or not.
...probably not if he valued his manhood.
[Preplayed with the Ears again! NFI, OOC is fiiiine. *offers popcorn* That Merlin and Francine had an argument is fine for broadcast; the topic, not so much.]
"No Katchoo," she said quietly, beckoning Merlin in and dropping her books on her desk.
"She might be running late," Merlin suggested, looking at the other bed nervously.
"I guess." Francine eyed it as well, as she sat down on her own. Then it was Merlin she was eying.
Merlin looked away quickly. "I'm sure she'll be back soon."
"Yeah." Ooh, look at her very interesting (and slightly sunburned thanks to sitting out in the anywhere but the house, which some people called a yard) knees. Aaaaaaand then up. "I--" No, because that would go off into her and.... just no.
"Can I help?" Smoooth, Merlin. Smoooth. "I mean--with anything?"
The right answer was 'you are, just by being here' and it was true, not just right, but it wasn't, too. Nothing could be easy. Everything had to be weird and messed up. She couldn't come back and find that things at least made sense in Fandom.
It was a testament to just how weird and messed up things were, yes, that she could even think the words sense in Fandom. "You can..." You can tell me what the hell Dinah meant last night. Except she didn't want to get Dinah in trouble, not when she didn't even know what it was.
So she cheated. "Was there the something you wanted to talk to me about?"
"Oh!" That was sooo not going to happen now. She was already clearly upset and this would only make things worse.
Merlin took a careful seat on Katchoo's bed, pausing to see if she would burst out of the closet to murder him for doing so. Nothing so far, so he may be safe. For now. "I--"
Words, Merlin. Words were good.
"--I think our books came to life that one weekend," he blurted out.
"..." That was so not what Francine was expecting, not that she knew what she was supposed to be expecting but that wasn't it, that she mentally paid Arthur a quarter and said, "What?"
"Books," he repeated helplessly. "They were laying on my bed. With a bag."
Oh god, the bag.
"Our books," she repeated slowly. "Which books?"
"The---book." You know... "And my magic book."
"And you think they--" Oh. That weekend. "Because they were on the bed?"
"With a bag." Please don't ask about the bag.
Francine was both curious despite herself and getting a leeettle bit frustrated. "So what was in the bag?"
"It was from that store in town." Awkwaaaard. "The one with the books like you bought."
Get to the point, Merlin.
"There were... things in it. They buzzed."
Blink. Blink. "It was a bag of bees?"
Merlin stared at her for a long moment. "What?"
"You said it buzzed!" Go Francine with the pointing and the blowing hair out of your face. Way to be unflustered.
"They were shaped liked..." He waved toward his crotch. "You know."
Oh, Francine might as well just sign over her allowance to Arthur now, get it over with. "WHAT?"
(Look, it could be so much worse. She could have said IT WAS A BAG OF BEES SHAPED LIKE PENISES??)
"I don't know! It was just there!" Flail like the wind, Merlin. Flail! "I put it all in the closet."
That would require someone more genre-savvy than Francine to laugh at it. Or just.... savvy. Francine just stared. "And you didn't buy it? Them?" Pause. "They buzzed??" It kind of bore repeating.
Merlin sputtered and looked at her like she grew a second head. "Of course not! They were just there!"
"With the books. On the bed." She just wanted to make sure she had this straight, so when she yelled about it in 25 seconds, she would know what she was yelling about.
"Yes."
"THAT'S what you wanted to talk to me about? Our books buying SEX TOYS?" Funny how when the stress meter went up, the awkward babble around sex stuff fell away (though not the blushing). That's what she'd been worrying about all night in addition to everything else she'd been worrying about all night?
She was conveniently forgetting the part where he hadn't said he wanted to talk to her about anything at all. Out loud.
"I--um--" This was going very, very badly. "--hadn't actually gotten to that part."
He was wondering if now would be a good time to flee.
Deep, deep breath. "Oh." She started to apologize for yelling, realized this meant she hadn't been worrying about sex toys which on the whole would have been a bit of a relief to be worrying about, and decided the apology would just distract him from spitting it the heck out so she could hopefully stop worrying about whatever it was that wasn't sex toys. "Then what is that part?"
Merlin was almost certain that he would not make it out of the room alive. But he bravely soldiered on with what needed to be talked about. Hopefully.
"I--we should wait until you've spoken to Katchoo about home." Or not. He was a coward.
Oh for... Francine's eyes narrowed. "Why?"
"It involves her and--you're upset and won't talk to me about it." There. It was a bit of the truth.
Francine clapped her hand to her forehead. "Yes. I'm upset," she said slowly. Carefully. Like she had a mouth full of TNT and it might go off at him any second now. "But it's not about you. It's just.... I can't right now. But I'll tell you later."
"You don't have to," Merlin replied, rubbing his face. "I just don't want to talk to you about this when you're already upset about something."
Slow. Slow. One word at a time. "I want to. I will." Hell, she wanted to tell him now and fall all over him, but it just... "I'm not gonna be any less upset about it any time soon. Worrying about something else isn't helping, Merlin. Just tell me."
"I don't want to upset you at all!" He insisted, taking a deep breath. "I--we--we need to talk about what's going on with Arthur and Katchoo."
Finally all blurted out.
Okay, look, you can't copyright a stare so she wasn't paying anybody any damn thing. "THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON WITH ARTHUR AND KATCHOO? SHE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE BOYS!"
Way to keep the volume down so people on the second floor can't hear you, Francie.
Merlin stared again. Because, really? Really?
"What?"
"You said! With Arthur and Katchoo! Why wouldn't she tell me something like that?" Francine stood up and paced over to Katchoo's bed, arms doing things that might end in more accidental broken parts if people weren't very careful. "Wait, why am I even asking that. Since when does she tell me anything these days? She didn't tell me when she was a boy, she didn't tell me she's gay--" Don't let Katchoo specifically disowning that label get in the way of a good rant, Francine. "She hasn't even told me where she is. Why would she tell me this?"
You should probably stop her before she gets to the part where Katchoo will probably forget to invite her to the wedding, too, Merlin. Catch her while she's still somewhat rational.
Blink blink blink. "Francine?"
"What??"
"I meant them and us." Okay, the mental image of Arthur and Katchoo together was terrifying on so, so many levels.
Terrifying and cute. Though Francine was possibly not the best judge of character when it came to adorably vicious children who looked and acted like Katchoo with Arthur's ego. She was also, underneath the explicable and inexplicable hurt, already moving to at least it's Arthur when Merlin interrupted her, which... basically said something else about how screwy their lives really were.
"Them and us?" she repeated slowly, tottering on the edge of nearing actual comprehension.
"Yes," Merlin replied, calm as he could. "We need to figure this out before--before someone is hurt."
Maybe in fact it wasn't the best time to have this conversation, since the half of it she almost understood made Francine's stomach clench in a way it wouldn't have a week ago. But that wouldn't change in a month or a year or, to be honest, the rest of her life, so unless Merlin counted time-travel among his spells, it was too late for there to be a best time.
The other half just kept the non-copyrighted stare on her face.
"What," she said, even more slowly, as slowly as she wanted him to explain himself, "are you talking about?"
Which was why he had tried to put this off, damn it.
"We both know what I'm talking about," Merlin said, looking away. "Things are--complicated."
Suddenly standing up didn't seem like such a great idea to Francine's legs. Rather than topple over, she went for sitting down abruptly on Katchoo's bed. And possibly half of Katchoo's laundry. "Because you like Arthur?" she asked in a very small voice. You know, the one thing here she actually knew.
"Because I like Arthur, and he likes me, and Katchoo likes you, and you like her," he muttered, trying to think of a way to make this less horrible, really.
"I knew that, what, WHAT, WHAT????" Standing again was a brilliant idea. Really.
He was going to die, wasn't he? Oh, the possibilities of that were hiiigh.
"Um. Yes."
"Um yes, what? Are you crazy?" She hadn't missed the what that wasn't in all caps; that was the what that was eating at her gut, in fact. But the other two... "I TOLD you it's not like that with Katchoo and me!"
Merlin sighed. "She loves you Francine. And I--I don't think you would have kissed her if you hadn't felt something like that in return."
Nope. Staring wasn't going to stop any time this year. "Sure she loves me. And I love her. Because we're best friends! We've known each other since we were twelve. The kissing thing was a spell, remember?"
"Francine. I spoke with her about it before." That was not going to help at all.
"You..." Mouth. Open. Hands. Hips. "You. Talked to Katchoo. About. THAT?"
Merlin would have taken a step back had he not been sitting. Francine was rather frightening there. "I--the subject came up when the... thing with Chuck happened."
Okay, one hand off the hip, because she needed one for running through her hair. And catching it in the tangles she put there the last time. "Why? What the heck does Chuck have to do with it?"
"They beat him up for you." A beat. "Didn't you know that?"
Both hands. Air. Possibly conducting the New York Philharmonic. "They did WHAT??"
"I thought you knew!"
"Chuck looked fine when I saw him!"
Merlin huffed in annoyance at that. "Because someone healed him that weekend. He didn't deserve that sort of help."
Francine shook her head in confusion that was rapidly moving towards explosion. "They beat him up. And then you... decided to go talk to Katchoo about how you think.... I don't even know what you're thinking anymore!" And if she didn't know what she thought either, well.... shut up. Your face.
"Francine, calm down. Please." Yeah, like that would help.
Merlin stood up, hands out as if to calm her. "It's not like that. The topic just... came up."
"Just came up. And she told you that... THAT?" This wasn't a badgerface. It was a whole new level of creature. Possibly a zombie were-badger.
"Well. Um." Dig the hole deeper, Merlin! We know you can! "I thought it was rather obvious how you two feel."
"................YOU said that to HER?" Zombie vampire were-badger. "So not only does nobody ever TELL me anything, you think you know how I feel BETTER THAN I DO?"
Yes, Merlin might have been edging away from her wrath now. "I just thought--"
"You just thought WHAT? And.... what do you even ...." Words, Francine. Words. Saliva is nice for weather effects but doesn't really convey all the proper nuances of expression. "Arrrgh! Are you just saying this because you don't want to be with me?" Her voice was just loud enough to cover the sound of something cracking inside her at that thought. "Because you could just SAY that and...." Get it over with. Instead of making up things that weren't true.
At all.
"I didn't say that," Merlin attempted very desperately to interject.
"Then what the hell ARE you saying?"
Well... Crap. "I don't know."
It was ball up her fists and hit him, ball up her fists and hit the wall, or just plain bawl, and she didn't like any of those options. "Well, let me know when you do!" She took a step toward him, then shook her head and turned away, stalking over to the desk to grab her purse. "If you figure out what I want, give me a call too. I THOUGHT it was you, but apparently I'm the last to know everything around here!"
Room 505 had a very good door for slamming.
Merlin stared at the door for a very long moment, not certain if going after her was for the best or not.
...probably not if he valued his manhood.
[Preplayed with the Ears again! NFI, OOC is fiiiine. *offers popcorn* That Merlin and Francine had an argument is fine for broadcast; the topic, not so much.]